[nurse_reedle]

My son has Sensory Integration Disorder too. We use a gentle parenting method that focuses on catching things before they happen, realizing that there are things they CAN do and you CAN'T tell them no....so don't...tell them what TO do instead. Eli: "I'm going to pee on you!" Mommy: "Oh, let's go do that in the potty!" and just physically take him to the potty. Eli: "I am going to throw this water!" Mommy: "You drink your water." if Eli still throws it, "Here is a towel, you can clean up your mess." If Eli refuses (and he will at first) then physically help him, if he still resists, sit on the florr and hold him and say: "Eli, you threw your water. You need to clean it up. It is ok if you aren't ready yet. I will hold you until you are." Then say nothing else unless he starts to get up, then say "Are you ready?" and only respond to his answer with ok.

Anyway, that is what we do for stuff like that. We also do do-overs.

[mommytoEli]

Originally Posted by nurse_reedle

My son has Sensory Integration Disorder too. We use a gentle parenting method that focuses on catching things before they happen, realizing that there are things they CAN do and you CAN'T tell them no....so don't...tell them what TO do instead. Eli: "I'm going to pee on you!" Mommy: "Oh, let's go do that in the potty!" and just physically take him to the potty. Eli: "I am going to throw this water!" Mommy: "You drink your water." if Eli still throws it, "Here is a towel, you can clean up your mess." If Eli refuses (and he will at first) then physically help him, if he still resists, sit on the florr and hold him and say: "Eli, you threw your water. You need to clean it up. It is ok if you aren't ready yet. I will hold you until you are." Then say nothing else unless he starts to get up, then say "Are you ready?" and only respond to his answer with ok.

Anyway, that is what we do for stuff like that. We also do do-overs.

FABULOUS! i love that idea. will start trying that asap!

[mommytoEli]

Originally Posted by Devora

Perhaps you're trying too many different things. What has worked? at all? even a few times? or at least halfway works? Whatever seems to have been the best strategy, do it (and only it) 100% of the time. Some of it sounds like testing limits (which is normal and he just may be at the far end of the spectrum of normal limit testing). He needs to know, every time, that the consequence will be the same. Otherwise it's almost a game -- what's mom going to do *this* time? what's she going to do if I do X? what if I do Y? what if I do Y three times in a row?

While all kids do better with consistency, some are more sensitive to the inconsistencies than others.

touche....i could probably choose one and stick with it. i can say i will try a technique multiple times, and when it doesn't work, i try to move on...bc i don't want to get stuck on something that isn't working. but i see what you are saying about the game...and i think that is true.

[mommytoEli]

dovelu- ok....what do i use as tokens?

[knarfmo]

We are doing some attachment therapy because Nicholas has been pretty agressive at times, doing things similar to what is described here. I think part of it is that he can't communicate very well yet and gets frustrated. Our counselor said that he is still angry about the handoff from the foster family and still trying to decide if he can trust us (it's been almost a year). He's definitely improved with some love and logic and consistency, but whew! what a temper he has! I'll have to ask about SID.

So, nothing helpful here, just want to share that we have similar issues.

[kathleenmarie]

I love the token system idea

ignoring the "yes I will" statements

no verbal responce at all if he tosses stuff just use gestue and make him clean up whatever mess he makes...........even if you have to do it hand over hand.

dont let him see you upset. kids love attention even if it is negative.

if neded I would "wrap" him. crossing his arms in front of him and standing behind him like a hug, untill he is calm ONLY IF he becomes hurtfull to himself or others.

good luck and let us know........use resouces in your area to get youself the comfort and help you need. they can send someone to your home to help with behaviors just like they do for OT or PT

{{{HUGS******