[Summerbaby06]

I just want to say I love my daughter very, very much and am struggling here to do what is best for her long term physically and emotionally. Saying that, when we brought our dd home 1.5 years ago, she was classified as obese. She is extremely short-she was in the .46% for height at her recent exam. She's not even 1%!!! Which is fine...but we have huge food issues with her. She is 4 years old by the way.
It is like she has no self regulation. She will eat every single thing put in front of her, so now we have to actually portion out her food calorie wise to make sure she isn't overeating. I'm really serious, if you put a whole carton of ice cream in front of her, she would finish it. She also has the tendency to sneak food when she thinks no one is watching, eat old food off the floor, lick her plate clean, etc....
The part that makes this so difficult is she has 3 siblings who are very tall and thin and they are allowed more food. They are also extremely active and our dd is very sedentary. She would love to just sit all day and not play. I'm sure a majority of this was due to the year she lived with her foster mother before coming home...her FM was also very overweight and we know she took our dd to church every day for several hours where she would have to just sit quietly.
Our other dd is also from Guatemala and she is 2 years old. She is now as tall as our 4 year old and they are wearing the same size clothes. This is becoming a huge issue with our dd as she is starting to notice differences in how much food everyone is given, etc.
I feel like i lose either way... I could let her eat to her heart's content and watch her balloon again (we have her to a maneagable weight now) or keep her food portions different from the other kids and have her resentful....This is a huge stressor for me and it has been difficult for us in attaching as this issues is always there.
Has anyone else experienced anything like this at all with your adopted kids from Guatemala???

[mevertin]

Hi,
I am a special ed. teacher and in no way a medical person, but has your doctor mentioned the possiblily of a syndrome called Prader-Willi Syndrome? Some of the behaviors and issues you described sound like some of the things a student of mine exhibited. He was a nice little boy, but had no control around food. He was obsessed. His parents literally had to padlock the fridge and the cabinets. He had some mild developmental delays and I remember he was quite short. I am not trying to freak you out and I may be way off, but you might want to Google it and read about it or talk to your doctor about it. I think this particular little boy's family had some success working with a behavioral therapist to help them set things up in the house to deal with the food issues. Might be worth a shot. Good luck. I'm sure it is so hard.
Mary
Mom to Bobby 11, Bridget 9, Angela 7, Eddie 3 (home from Guatemala in 2005) and Reginaldo 10 months, home since February.

[dance_muffin]

Can you enroll her in soccer or a dance class? Those activities both start at 3yrs.

Can you serve her meals on a slightly smaller plate than the rest of the kids? Pile up the veggies. What about a salad to go with her meal? Skim milk and lowfat yogurt. All snacks should be lowfat. Water down any of her juices. Lots of fresh fruits.

After meals if the weather is permitting, take her for a walk or the park to run around.

I would also take her to the supermarket and direct her to some healthy snacks that she can pick out. This will give her some control about what she can eat.

I would definitely distract her when she has finished her meal and is looking for more. Take out an art project for her to do or a game that you can play together.

Talk with your ped. maybe they will have suggestions for you.

Good luck. Let us know how your dd is doing.

[Summerbaby06]

I just wanted to add that she does not have Prader-Will syndrome. I was worried that she may have had that and her doctor said no. She is in gymnastics which she enjoys, but hates playing outside with her siblings or any other kind of "activity." She does get all low fat snacks, skim milk, etc. The hard part is her tall, thin siblings get more food than she does. And they get seconds if they are still hungry and we just can't do that with her. I also model very healthy eating and exercise. She sees me go to they gym daily or I go running for miles. I also eat extremely healthy so she can see. We have had to instruct her to only take bites at meals when her sister does, or she will gobble her whole plate down in a minute.

[susy...patience]

I think they often have different perspectives than other doctors...there are several throughout country & if you aren't close physically, they can do phone/video consultations.

[bamaya]

We have some similiar issues w/ our 10 yr old bio son. My other two bio sons are built completely different, thin, active, barely eat. Cameron will eat anytime he sees food, hates to share, and will only get up and play outside if we force him. When he eats, he's "zoned" right in on the food, he won't hear you talk, etc. It's actually kinda embarrassing in a restaurant. But his problems stem somehow from his Obsessive Complusive disorder. It's part of the hoarding thing. Have you checked into that at all? PM me if you want more details.

Brenda

[joshsmom]

Sometimes kids that have in the past not had enough to eat will horde food or eat excessively for fear of being hungry again. You didn't say how old your daughter was when you brought her home or what her situation was before she lived with her FM so maybe this doesn't apply. I agree with seeing a doctor that specializes in International Adoption, Behavioral Therapist, or maybe even a psychiatrist. Maybe there is an underlying reason for her eating this way.

I hope you are able to find the help you need for your daughter.

[Adoption_Ally]

I'm not a doctor either, but I've had to educate myself about health issues for these kiddos because of issues with my two.

It is not unusual for children who have been malnourished early in life to have the kind of eating problems that you are talking about. Even though your daughter was obese when you brought her home, is it possible that earlier in life she could have been malnourished? When we brought my son home at 2 1/2-ish, he would stuff entire bananas into his mouth. My son was about 10 before he could tell the difference between hungry and too full! Even into high school we had to do some portion control stuff, otherwise he wouldn't be able to stop himself.

Has your daughter had a workup with a pediatric endocrinologist? And another question - is the .46% for height using the caucasian chart or a hispanic chart (if she's hispanic)? There are different height charts for different ethnicities. Has she always been in this % for height or is she falling back?

If her hormones are out of wack in some way it could explain her size issues - both height and weight. A regular ped isn't going to be able to diagnose or treat those problems.

Your daughter also sounds at risk for precocious puberty as well. There's a whole thread talking about it here: OT: Puberty at age 7?

My daughter is both on hormone supression therapy for precocious puberty and on growth hormone due to her tiny size. They have been very effective for her. Whe we first went to the pediatric endocrinologist he did a complete evaluation of all her hormone levels, including cortisol and insulin.

Of course, if you've already been to the pediatric endo and he's done all this, then forget everything I've just said!

Good luck with this - I can see why it's not a lot of fun for either of you. Let me know if there is any way I can help.

[angelkisses0102]

One other avenue may be sensory processing disorder...my DS has an issue with internal regulation. Meaning he does not know when he is hungry or full...if he is hot or cold...etc...the interoceptive sense. Interoceptive Sense

[Summerbaby06]

I have had her bloodwork done several times to check for anything out of the ordinary...nothing shows up. You're right, the height chart is not specific for Guatemelans, but her sister (not bio) who is also from Guatemala and is only 2 years old is the same height as her and is normal on the scale. Our dd seems to be falling back on the chart for height. It is extremely possible she was malnourished before living with her foster mother. We just don't know anything about her past which is really hard. I don't think she has sensory processing disorder. I read through the whole checklist and it just doesn't fit her profile at all.

[SKL]

Hi! I don't have any advice but I wanted to send you some moral support. This is such a delicate matter.

My parents have 6 bio kids, and one girl was different from all the rest, in that she was the only one who liked to overeat and became obese. The rest of us were skinny and very active. Although my sister was in no way underfed, she frequently felt deprived and would beg, fight, and cry for more food. My dad used to give in, my mom took a hard line. Ultimately her issues did not get resolved and she continues to struggle with her weight and her self-image. One thing she says is that it never did any good to be told she was too heavy and needed portion control, as she already knew that and it only made her feel worse and eat more. So frustrating and painful for everyone involved.

I wish I could tell you what "worked" but my family never really found it. I wish you better luck, and commend you for making the effort to help your daughter at an early age.