[SaraAvaandLileesMama]

Please no bad comments here!!!!!!! Only good please! I am appologizing!!!!! To my relpy to Bizzie's thread! I can assure you ,my reply to bizzie's post for wanting #2 was totally innocent. I did not in anyway mean for that to sound ugly!Sorry Bizzie for ruining your thread! My heart was in the right place maybe not my words. 1 of our birthmom's has given up 3 children. I would be blessed to get any of her children. All was saying is one of our birthmom's would have to have another child for my DH to adopt again. I am not praying she has another child for us, but if she did we would love to have a bio. sibling for our adopted children.

I have been around here for a very long time!!!!!!!!!
For all you old posters you now I always mean well and I am not an ugly person or like confrontations!
But I am sorry to say that the person who took my reponse the wrong way you must be new. For I have not seen you before. To know who I am as a person read all my old threads/ post so you can know I am a good person and always mean well!

Please forgive my offending words!

[wmlaw2k1]

Nothing you said bothered me. It's unfortunate that people are always blowing things out of proportion and hurting feelings on here. With this being an adoption board, it should be more supportive, but lately, more and more daggers have been thrown over stupid misunderstandings. It's just sad.

[Candace3]

oh my, anyone who has gotten to 'know' you through this forum would know you are a wonderful person who is always full of encouragement. I have said it before, we are typing and our true meaning is often lost or confused.

[crayolamom]

I agree with the previous posters, you are always encouraging and kind. I would not worry too much about this. This forum - like email tends to bring out the best and sometimes the less that perfect in all of us. Happy New Year my friend!

[kzwief]

So much can be lost in translation. It is easy for things or statements to be misunderstood without being able to hear the intonation of a persons voice or see their body language. I didn't take offense to what you said either. Let's all make 2008 a wonderful, supportive year! This is a great forum to share our hopes, dreams, fears and of course reality and I look forward to sharing more with all of you. Happy New Year!

[cjrogers]

You are an awesome person. As you know, and as someone else on this board once told me, anything other than an announcement of "pink" or "out" can offend someone.

I read your post as it was intended by you... and it was a positive posting!!!!

Happy New Year!

CJ

[SKL]

I haven't read that thread yet, but I understand how you feel because I had a similar thing happen to me recently. Unfortunately it can be difficult to see how others will take your words until after it's too late to revise them. Sadly, when things get really tough for me I am afraid to post on here because I don't want people to confirm that I am, indeed, a lousy mother. So I have basically lost one of the most important resources I had. I wish we could all just give each other the benefit of the doubt. All of us need support at one time or another.

I know it can really get you down when this type of thing happens. I hope you feel better soon and really enjoy your new year!

[SaraAvaandLileesMama]

Thanks to ones who posted! I know there are way to many good and postitive people on here for just 1 or 2 to ruin a good support for me. SKL, don't go away, we need your support too!

[pigmom]

Now children, let's misunderstand things and fight! This is a great supportive group. It's amazing that there's not more conflict given our differences in ages, religions, areas of the world, backgrounds, etc, etc. We need to celebrate our cohesiveness!! Guess what ties us together -- THE KIDS!!!!

[amyfk]

Dear SarahAvaandLilee's

I feel the exact same way as you. I would be glad to adopt if I found out my child had a younger bio sibling, but I wouldnt wish any pain, trouble on the birthmom.
Most of it has to do with keeping biological siblings together.
Amy K, NJ

[guatemama94]

Don't worry, I know your heart is in the right place. I think it is hard to post what you mean sometimes so that it comes out sounding right to all people reading. Hugs!!!

[arepa]

[!
But I am sorry to say that the person who took my reponse the wrong way you must be new. For I have not seen you before.


Because I am new, I am not allowed to voice an opinion? This board in addition to being supportive is also a place to have discussion. I do not feel that I was disrespectful of you or rude. I simply gave my opinion, after reading a part of your post that saddened me! I responded to that. Plain and simple. I am not one to cause a posting riot, just a woman with an opinion. Free speach (thanks to those who are and have served this country) is still allowed in the US and that includes this board (as long as you do not get wild with it). Discussion is good- it brings out all sides to voice their opinion and as long as things do not get wild it is good for the soul and democracy as well. Just south of the US voicing your opinion is not allowed, we should feel happy we are able to access the internet and connect with each other and discuss things that effect us. This forum is about adoption and we should feel free to discuss and argue (respectively) what we see as the problems that plague such a beautiful part of our lives. Sometimes an original post will drift from its original thought, but that I find interesting. One thought leads to another and so on. We should have more discussions it is good for the brain! Sometimes feelings can get hurt-mine have been before-but you pull yourself back up and jump back in to it. Perhaps we can make changes in the way adoption is handled, we all love our children and want ethical adoption practices. More discussion is needed on adoption.

[crick]

Arepa - just my thought, but I don't think anyone feels that discussion is a bad thing at all. It's often hard to interpret things on line, especially when there seems to be a kind of "tone" being displayed. I don't know your posting style well, so have no idea if you have a tone or not. Just as you might not be familiar with other posters either and misinterpret their words as well. I try to assume the best rather than not though...until someone clearly shows they have no good side.

Discussion is always good...so is asking for clarification at times before assuming someone is xx or xx. No one said new people shouldn't voice an opinion..not at all. Just goes to further show how on any side of the coin, people's words can be seen different ways.

May we all breathe just a bit and see the good in everyone as we welcome the new year.

[IH8MEAT]

Don't worry about it!!

[brenda.lynn]

I read the post, and understanded exactly what you meant. I feel the same way. No, I am not wanting someone to go through the pain of giving up another child. But, like SaraAvaandLileesmama, my husband said we cannot adopt again unless the birthmom gave up another. And yes, sometimes I wish she was pregnant. Does this make us bad? I don't think so, but that is a matter of opinion.

As for the debate that happened on the other thread, I agree we are all entitled to our opinion. But, must of us come here for support. This process breaks my heart daily, as I am sure it does everyone else. I just think we are all so emotionally raw, that things that are meant to just be an opinion cut deeper than intended.