[wertygirl]

Hi!

We have been home for a little over a month, and I have been meaning to post- but time has just zipped by! Molly is doing wonderfully. She's had no issues at all. She's such a happy little sweetie. She had her first doctor's appointment yesterday with an international adoption specialist (She was fantastic. PM me if you're around Seattle and need a recommendation.). Molly's a solid 19.5 lbs. We're still waiting to see some teeth, but the drooling and biting tells me it won't be long. It's not stopping her from munching away on little bits of food.

When we picked her up, she was just starting to crawl, and now she's working on cruising! My son took his first steps on Christmas at my parents' house in Colorado, and everyone is predicting she'll do the same.

Our 4.5 yo son is having a MUCH harder time adjusting than Molly is. He's so conflicted. He adores her, but there's a lot of jealousy and acting out. He's been trying to get attention in the worst ways, and there seems to be no reasoning with him. We've been trying to give him extra attention and patience, but he's wearing me out. I thought Molly's adjustment would be the biggest initial challenge, but it's our son who's giving us the most concerns. My parenting confidence is at an all time low. If anyone has any tips, I'd love to hear them.

That's it in a nutshell. Here's a little photo album with a few shots from pick up and the last month. She loves the camera!

I'm going to try and catch up on all the news I've missed. Congratulations to those who've had good news and I hope those waiting get good news soon. I've been thinking about you guys. We started our process 2 years ago, and it's still surreal that it's finally over. I haven't forgotten about the hardships we went through, but it was, of course, all worth it.

[JustBarbara]

Sounds like your little girl is settling in very well. I can't say I'm surprised about your son - I can only imagine him being an only child and then all of a sudden there's competition for your attention. DS is now 20 months - he's been home since he was 5.5 months and only in the last few months has his boy cousin started to really warm up to him. Cousin's twin sister has been soooooo happy to have a baby in the family and from the get-go has been more than happy to help feed, bathe and change diapers. Hang in there - I tried looking at your photos but it says I'm timed out.

[wertygirl]

Hey Barb!

I saw you guys at the airport in GC going through security, but you were too far ahead of us to holler. Too many stern guards around to shout "Hey, I know you from the internet!" I recognized your cute boys.

Whoops, maybe this link will work instead.

[ourjourneytwo]

Oh, what a little doll! Those are great pics. She looks very happy!

[mattecook]

Barb

Congrats! Don't beat yourself up. When I brought my youngest home my then 2 year old was biting her like crazy. Elly (the little one) would just scream and Emma would cry because she was jealous and didn't know what to do. At one point in time I was sitting on the floor all 3 of us crying wondering what I had done to both of these precious children. The struggles lasted about 3 weeks and then all of a sudden one day it all fell into place. This is a huge adjustment for everyone and some people have a tougher time of it than others. 4 1/2 is a difficult age to have to adjust to a new sibling. Hang in there brighter days are to come just take it hour by hour.

Ami

[dilgra]

Molly is a little doll! No advice on the sibling rivalry but you have a beautiful family. Congrats!

[CEB]

What a gorgeous smiley little girl you have there - thanks so much for the update on Molly!

I have no words of advice for you on DS - just best wishes that his adjustment makes good progress soon as well

[CurlysGirly]

Kim! I was just wondering about you guys! I adore Molly and her groovy leg warmers. She is a doll!

My son is 4.5 (and has that same Spiderman costume!! LOL). He did much of what you are talking about. I would say that it took him about a month or so to get over the obvious conflict of lovin' on her and disliking her within the same 5 minutes...lol. Luckily Devon is persistant and made it impossible for him to dislike her For the longest time I didn't leave them alone together while I left the room because he would do things like test her gravity skills, steal away toys, etc.

I'm so happy that you guys are finally all together!

[arthymom]

So happy to see your post!

I still live on this forum...Can't get enough still.

Our 4.5 year old has had huge issues since dd's homecoming in July. Same as what you're describing.
For us, it's getting a lot better at home but he's acting out at school instead.

Someone in early childhood ed. said: You take a kid whose most important influence is now no longer able to meet that kid's needs the majority of the time right away. That will rock his/her world. Some kids snap back fast, others (mine) don't snap back quite as fast.

I found that instead of reprimanding ds for minor things (non-physical) I instead remove dd from the situation. She whines but I figure it's better for him to know that I'm not alwyas going to "side" with her (for lack of a better word?) If he does somethign like hit her, push her, etc...I do an immediate time out with a lot of praise about what he does well after, and ask him to hug and kiss her.

After 3 1/2 months, things are better at home but he's saving the bad behavior for school unfortunately.

Best wishes,

[saranbr]

She is so cute!! I'm happy for you that she's adjusting so well, hopefully big brother won't be too far behind.

[purplecat]

Molly is so adorable!!!