[pundyrose]

I am finally out of PGN and getting ready for pickup (in 3-4 weeks). I am thinking about giving my FM some money, not due to contractual obligation but because she was good to my baby. Has anyone done it and what would be a proper amount?

[guatparents2be]

Hi there. We were going to give cash and our lawyer and agency both said they preferred that we not do that. We ended up having the lawyer ask what the fm wanted and we got them a digital camera. Not to dissuade you from giving cash, but I know there has been discussion about it before on the forum...you can do a search.

[LucaBella]

Yes,
We gave our FM money. I know the agencies say not to give them a gift, but if they need money they will sell that gift.

So just follow your heart.

[TerriBB]

We handed her cash...she loved her 11 months. I kept in mind that if Flora was home, we'd be paying $1200+ per month for daycare.

When I got copies of the pictures developed from the cameras that we had sent, I really realized how poor they were and that cash would provide food for her and her two teenagers. Each month, the photos from our agency showed the foster mother in the same shirt - it must have been her "good" outfit.

We also brought several Gerber bottles, extra nipples, small baby clothes/onsies/socks and fun wrist watches. Baby items cost the same as things do here.

Her daughters made a few scrapbooking type things with a few of the photos! They are precious to me.

[redru2004]

We just saw our FM yesterday when she brought Lucas to us. She has loved him for over 10 months now, and she has kept him safe and healthy and happy, I can't pay that back. We got gifts for the entire foster family which included FM, F GMOM, FSon and Fsister. We also gave them cash. A couple hundred dollars means a lot more to them than it does to me, and quite frankly I'll never be able to pay her back for the gift she gave me...a healthy, happy and secure son! As far as the amount, I don't think there is a proper amount, its whatever you're comfortable giving. We gave our FM $125 on our visit trip, and $200 on our pick up trip, along with a digital camera, an engraved photo album or Lucas and some See's Chocolates.