[jpeel99]

Well the sweet little baby and IS NOW A TODDLER....with a mind of his own...He was never one to really cry much....but these tantrums are quite another story. What do you advise on dealing with them.

thanks

[jennynabee]

Oh yes, tantrums! My son started at 1.5 and had them until he was about 4 or so. Aren't they just a joy!? Well, my son would not be held during a tantrum--it would make it worse! So the holding and rocking advice I tossed out the window. sometimes I would just sit next to him and attempt to soothe him...not always successful. I did find a book that helped...The happiest toddler on the block. (can't remember the author..Harvey?) and also a book called positive discipline--not much on discipline, but lots of good ideas on giving choices. Just remember that this too shall pass! Be thankful he is so determined and strong-willed...it will be great later in life. Of course, my neighbor just walked out of the room when her son tantrumed, but that again only made it worse for my son. I think as my son was better able to express himself the tantrums began to go away! Hurray!

[jalavimi]

Tantrums are a pain - I agree with you. Every child has them though. Some more than others. Like the previous poster said, choices are a good thing. It could be like, "Do you want to wear your red hat or blue hat?" Or, "Do you want to walk to your room or do you want me to carry you?" After they have made a choice though, and they still have a tantrum - I would suggest not even giving attention to the child until the tantrum stops. Even if they are flinging themselves on the floor at the store - walk a little ways away and "pretend" to do something else. Or, just leave (that's what I do). Different kids require different solutions. My firstborn would stop a tantrum when I said, "That is enough!" My second born would stop a tantrum only when I left the room. My third born stops the tantrum only when I don't acknowledge him. Just go about your business and let them be. When they have had enough with the tantrum, they will stop - at that point, start playing with them or whatever. They then figure out that the behavior that gets your attention is the positive behavior, not the negative one. Does any of that make any sense? There is a good book out there, by Kevin Leman. Making Children Mind Without Losing Yours. Good luck!

[jalavimi]

Of course, when I said that I just leave when the kid has a tantrum in the store - I meant I take the kid with me and leave. :-)