[Sandy Harboe]

For those of you who went through this time. Did you also hear these Rumors? Was any of it true? Were you told by your agency that it wasn't going to happen & everything would be okay?

I guess what I'm trying to ask is if you were told the same stuff that us new beginners (again) are being told.
Thanks for sharing your story.

[jalavimi]

Bumping - I would love to hear people's experiences too. Thanks!

[jose'smom]

I was told about the shutdown and that NO ONE knew what would happen. I was offered to switch countries which we refused b/c I was in love with my little boy already. I guess I was naive, but very grateful when they opened back up and I brought my son home. So basically, they informed me and left the decision up to us.
Amy

[moelladeville]

I'm a Hague 2003 survivor, and my case went to PGN the day they shut it down. We missed being grandfathered in by ONE day. We had no idea and did not see it coming. Our agency told us NOTHING.

I was not as well integrated into the Guatemala adoption community as I am now, but I had no forewarning -- not even rumors -- that there might be a shutdown. My agency told me zip (so either they didn't know, or they didn't tell) until it happened, and then they downplayed it.

My younger sister was dying of cancer at the time, so that whole year was a blur. If that hadn't been going on, I know I would have been glued to the computer. I got my son's referral in February, and he came home in December. His/our attorney is one of the ones that signed the Amparo that let adoptions continue.

If you want to read the history, you can go to Guatadopt and look in the archives. They were my source of information during the Hague.

One thing I will say is that although my first adoption process was scary as heck, my second and third were no easier. I am single, and I went into both of those adoptions with amplified fear that singles would be banned -- both times there was legislation pending.

People have asked me two questions about my experience. One is would I start another adoption now. I, personally, would not. Although if I didn't have my children home, I am sure that would be a different story. I desperately wanted my son to have siblings from Guatemala.

The second question I get asked is, "How did you manage the risk during your adoptions?" The answer is, you know your children are meant for you. So you take chances. You know there is risk. You hope. If you're religious, you pray. In international adoption, there is never a "safe" time when you are "guaranteed" that your adoption will be smooth and effortless. Risk is inherent in the process. But I can tell you first hand and three times over that the risk is worth it.

For those of you just starting or waiting, I am wishing you all the very best. Hang in there, it's worth the wait, the scariness and the risk.

Marjorie

[knarfmo]

Originally Posted by moelladeville

In international adoption, there is never a "safe" time when you are "guaranteed" that your adoption will be smooth and effortless. Risk is inherent in the process. But I can tell you first hand and three times over that the risk is worth it.
Marjorie

I don't think this applies only to international adoption.

Our first adoption was out of Oklahoma, supposedly an adoption-friendly state. We definitely had risks and bumps in the road. With a private domestic adoption, the cards are stacked in favor of everyone but the adoptive parents. We have a system aimed at placing kids for adoption as a last resort - not so much because I think we have anti-adoption states, but because they want adoptions to be as secure as possible because when it's final - it's supposed to be final.

[Clare'sMom]

Read the monthly archives on Guat Adopt, they explain things much better than I could...... It's realy sad to read

We actually started our adoption Journey in early Spring of 2003 and hadn't acepted a referal when everything went nuts..... Thank God we spole to a wonderful agency who told us what was happening before we got to far into it. That agency no longer will do adoptions from Guat....
We thought about China for about 10 minutes and just knew that we should wait it out. I'm really glad we did. It was a long, hard wait (over a year), but it was so worth it.

Now with all of this recent mess I have to keep reminding myself to be patient. But my Baby is there and I am here and Im not a patient person any more....

Ann

[Sandy Harboe]

Thanks for all your replies. I would love to hear for more of you.

When you say "Grandfathered" isn't that when you have turned in you I600A? or I'm I confused as usual?

[tinaedmond]

We accepted a referral in Jan 03, but weren't paper ready yet. We were paper ready in March, but of course missed the "cutoff date" - that our agency never did tell us about. I believe they didn't really understand what was happening - not that that is an excuse, but I never felt they lied to us or withheld info. I did learn things much faster than they by frequenting the board here and the Big List.

We didn't really realize what was going on with the Hague until about May or June 03, and then in July the Embassy stopped giving DNA authorization. We didn't have ours yet. That's when it kind of hit how long of a wait we may be in for, although we were always hopeful it wouldn't be so long.

As for the rumors, there was something new every other day for a few months, that either lifted your spirits or dashed your hopes on the rocks. It was a horrible time.

Our lawyer also signed the amparo, but it doesn't mean he was a good lawyer!!

Thankfully, although we waited forever for DNA authorization (October 03), we had a relatively short stay in PGN of about 7 weeks, even with one kickout.

Wouldn't change a thing, to be honest with you, even though the wait was excruciating and I wish I hadn't missed so much of our daughter's young life. Things happened at the end of our process that we were directly involved in, that we may not have had the opportunity to be, had our adoption not taken so long. Also, it helped us to form a lasting bond with our foster family, who we now consider an extended part of our family.

So, whatever happens is what is destined to happen, even if we don't understand it at the time!

Tina

[rlt]

We were kept informed by our agency. As a matter of fact, our agency is in Massachussets and some of their representatives traveled to Baltimore to talk to their Maryland families (all these meetings also involved our home study/local agency). They were honest and told us that they didn't know what would happen and gave us the choice to change programs (they actually encouraged us to do so...). We decided not to, couldn't do it after having fallen in love with our son.
Our lawyer also signed the Amparo. I think we were lucky, because we brought Cristian home almost 8 months after referral.
Grandfathering meant that referrals that were accepted prior to a specific date (I believe that in our case was sometime in March 2003) would be processed... they would be "grandfathered in" using the old rules.

Don't get discouraged! Good luck!

[spidermanteache]

Yep,
Hague Survivor here!! We were actually waiting for DNA to be done throughout the Hague time, but everyday was new rumors and everything moved super slow! I wouldn't have done it any other way, either, but it was tough and not easy to get through.

[BrooklynsMom]

It truly was a nightmare...I fortunately had gotten dna done before they stopped that part so our daughter came home relatively soon after the country opened back up....
I for one...would not start an adoption from Guatemala at this time...You will lose all your money and although I am sure agencies learned alot during tht time on how to keep their families more updated....there is nothing even a good agency can do...to get your baby home if the country is shut down...and there is NO guarantee it will open back up...It is different now in the sense...that the shutdown will come from the U.S side as well...
Everyone involved in the 2003 shutdown...never knew if our babies would come home...we were all so blessed that they did come home...but..if I did not have a referral....at this time...I would either wait and see what happens....or choose another country...it even hurts me to type that...Our hearts are so in Guatemala and all the children...but Cambodia still hasn't opened back up and look how many yrs have gone by....

Beth

[tricecm]

Another survivor here too!

No, we didn't hear anything, but like Marjory we were not as knowledgeable about Guatemalan adoptions as we are now. We accepted our referral 3 weeks after the Hague shutdown began. I don't believe our agency knew anything about it. They were very INexperienced with Guatemalan adoptions.

It took a full year to bring our daughter home. She came home 4 days before her first birthday (2 weeks old at time of referral).

If I had it to do over again what would I do? I would work harder to find a super experienced agency that had a good rep, and ask them. A friend of mine (who is on here frequently) waited until the Hague stuff had blown over before accepting a referral. She ended up bringing home her baby 3 months before we brought ours home. He was about 3-4 months old.

I say that I would wait NOT because I needed to have our child home at a younger age, although if she had been much older it would have been more problematic. I say it because of my own peace of mind as a waiting parent.

For those of you who are people of faith---I'll tell you this (and I'm not kidding or being sarcastic about this)---my faith and prayer life was never better than that year we waited for Rosie. I spend more time in conversation with God and trusting Him than at any other time in my life. I need to work on that now.

Good luck!