[adoptguatemalablog]

Sweet! I've beenway with our Middle School on a retreat for the week. Thanks for the responses. I'm going to post them as "Free Advice" over on the Guatemala Adoption Blog. I won't be specific as to who said what but will try and keep it pretty much to what you said. If you have issues with me using the advice on the blog, PM me and let me know.

Check it out when it's finished!

Guatemala Adoption Blog

[redru2004]

Best piece of advice I got was "Don't dwell on all the firsts that your missing during the wait. You'll still have you OWN set of firsts...the first time you hold him, the first time he smiles at you, the first time you rock him to sleep, the first time you feed him...etc". It's not always easy to remember during this wait, but I know I'll cherish every single one of our firsts with our son.

[arthymom]

Don't worry over what you can't control. Work on what you can. Find out what is happening on your case but don't bug the agency constantly. Do your part and let them do theirs. And if something doesn't go your way, know there are all of us in the same boat, maybe at a different step of the way. None of this is easy.

[SadieAnn]

The best adoption advice I ever followed I actually gave myself.

We followed the domestic adoption road to our son. 4 months before he was born we had a painful failed placement. We had a newborn in our arms and lives 30 min. after he was born. 5 wks later, after spending Christmas a New Years with him, his bparents changed their minds. We were devestated, and for a moment considered giving up all together.

I looked at my dh and said, "NO... the ONLY way we'll never be parents is if we give up... so that is NOT an option". We went forward and 3 months later brought home John (now 17 mos).

Lori

[Hopingsoon]

My best advice so far? Don't sweat the homestudy. I made this up in my head to be the worst thing that could ever happen to a person, and reacted accordingly. I had near panic attacks before, and then after, when I know things had gone well.

I am a very, very private person. To invite a STRANGER into my home, and into my mind is inconceivable. But, guess what? The pain of cleaning my house to the point that I thought would be acceptable to the SW was far more painful than the actual interviews. Did I go overboard? Yes, but truthfully, the basement was WAY overdue to be scrubbed down, LOL (and I made DH do it!).

Another thing I liked.........

However you feel is ok - don't worry that it's the wrong feeling - you may not fall in love with the baby right away, you may resent the baby at night when you're tired, that's all ok - your feelings are your feelings and you don't need to feel guilty if you're not full of love every minute of every day with this child.
__________________

I have a feeling this will come in handy when DS is home :-)

[stillwaiting]

The best advice I have ever heard actually came from a man to my husband. He said, "I can live with out being a parent but my wife can't, so we are going to adopt."

I will never forget him telling that to my husband when we were trying to decide if we were going to adopt.

I am so greatfull to him. He nudged hubby in the right direction.

[coachmom]

Check out the agency you want to use very, very well... research, research, research..
and
You can never afford to have kids, but God provides..
each one is a blessing to someone..who knows..they might be the president one day.....
Doretta

[sweetjourney]

The best advice I ever received was from our paster. God's timing is best, even if something seems like a setback to you- it could be that it's a crutial step to the best outcome.

[saranbr]

Not that I was convinced at the time, but..."she'll come home at EXACTLY the right time", God's time which is always perfect, that is.

[mummi2be]

Two things

1. (told to me by several adopters and my mom) don't just have/adopt one child 'you will never regret adding another child to your family, but you may regret not adding one'

2. From someone I just met who adopted from guatemala and came home last month 'Just embrase it, let go of the need to control the time/process, it will happen just relax and follow'