[jldaoakes]

There is no way nice about it... go with your gut feeling (well at least mine) nice but FIRM. I was totally LOL when I read this post in that your DH's X is exactly like my sister-in-law and DH's X wife. "It's all about me". I swear they will do anything and say anything to make everything about them. People like that make me sick.

Good luck

Julie

[GuatMommy2Be]

I admit, when I first saw this title the first thing I thought was "oh dear god!!!!!" LOL.

Maybe you could say that this is a family event....

[kacmom1]

Give me her phone number, I'll give her a call for you!
HAHAHAHA!

Is she crazy? Why would she WANT to be there???

[lockharts]

I totally understand what you are feeling. I had that same situation with my Ex. We switched our weekends... I would just find a way to speak to her in person and let her know that this is truely a PRIVATE family moment that you do not want to share. IT is a once in a lifetime moment that is stictly meant for your family. NOT her former family.... YOUR FAMILY.. I'd tell her that you are not meaning to insult or hurt her feelings, but you want to be perfectly clear... Please do not come to the airport. Please do not show up uninvited to our home. I hope this helps. Good luck. God Bless

[Bug-n-Bears-Mommy]

There is nothing in this world worse than an EX wife!! If I had known then what I know now...well, I just don't know if we would be together. She is a HAG!!

Honestly, if DH doesn't want to address the situation, I would do it myself. I know that is what I had to do. The girls wanted to join Girl Scouts, and the meeting was on the same night as one of our PRIDE classes. Bad Kitty...the nicest nick name I have for her...told us that she would have nothing to do with the girls joining because she didn't have the time. I told her that I guess they would not be joining then because it was the night of one of our classes and quite frankly nothing was going to stand in the way!

She of course called DH whining to him that I said the girls were not important. This from the same woman who told me...while we were trying to get PG..."don't try too hard because once you have your own you sill stop loving mine." It was about that time I realized that there was no shrink in the world educated enough to take care of HER problems!

Stick to your guns...no EX is worth ruining YOUR moment! Best of luck to you!

[AddisonsMommy]

OH OH OH!!!

I have an even BETTER idea!! Do you watch the Ellen show?

Sometimes she has had people on there who need someone to "make a call" for them. So, Ellen gets on the phone, ON the air with the person sitting right next to her on the stage, and Ellen herself does the deed of telling them whatever it is that person does not have the guts to tell them. I saw once where a young bride had Ellen to tell her new mother in law that the dinners were just GROSS and to stop cooking, cause she was not eating them any more. It was so hilarious! The MIL was quite receptive. Who could be nasty to Ellen? There was another one where a guy had to admit something to his boss and Ellen did the calling. Also very funny.

I also believe I have seen Dave Letterman do this!

Could be fun.............heheheheheheeeeee!!

Jen

[deninew]

I can understand how awkward this must be for you.... My only thought is that if you start making exclusions right from the gate when she wants to be involved that things could become less than friendly...I know that sounds good, but with two families coming together mabey letting her be there may not be that bad. Just have your hubby set some groung rules. Please dont beat me up...it was just an opinion

Good Luck
Denise

[AnasMama]

You have all had bery good suggestions, and you gave me a few chuckles too! I am hoping we will be able to make the pickup trip, and never have her know that we left the country! I definately will not have her at the airport though... If she happens to have the boys the week of our pickup trip, I will have my mom ask if she can pick up the boys and bring them to the airport. MY mom is pretty direct, and can let her know that it is just not appropriate. We have to have our boundaries after all!

[brinawynne]

Tell her what day your coming home, make it a day later then you actually are, and let her wait at the airport for...nobody! You can always say "oops, we made it home a day earlier"

[devildogwife]

I agree that this is definitely your moment. Make those boundaries clear so she does NOT show up at the airport. If she doesn't like that, oh well. She'll get over it.

[GabeMom]

You have to do what you and your family is comfortable doing. The other side is that to be honest all of those things seem REALLY important right now, but at least for me they don't matter that much anymore.

I missed my baby shower b/c it kept getting put off and when they finally planned it we left the same day for our Pick Up Trip. Then we had a bunch of people that were planning to meet us at the airport. We landed in Houston to go through immigration the day before Rita hit and our flight home was cancelled. At that point, all I cared about was making sure that my son got home safely. We wound up getting out of Houston much later than planned and flying into an airport several hours away from home and missing out on the welcome home that I dreamed about, but I felt so truly blessed to be away from the hurricane it didn't matter.

All of that to say that your feelings are very valid and it sucks that she is intruding on your happiness, but if it is going to cause WWIII and create more drama let her try to be awful. Expected mothers are highly emotional, but in the end the Ex can't ruin the joy you will fell--she can only try. She is the one that will look bad.

I hope that makes sense. I wish you the best of luck and the sweetest joy in bringing home your new baby girl.

[disneycrazedhubby]

send her a invitation for both.. to meet at the airport and the baby shower but change the dates and places , i think she'd get the message .
I hear my wife mentally telling me ... " now be nice ! mister" but hey i agree she has no business being at either. good luck!