[aunt Ceecee]

Hello Everyone,

Boy, I have to say after I read the "Roll Call" post the other day I closed out my computer and ran far,far away....... I was shocked to see there were only a hand full of others in our age group...(40 - 50 ). I thought my age was the majority not the other way around. You see I took an extra long time deciding to adopt because I thought we were too old. All of my friends and family thought we were nuts at first because their children are all growen and they are now grand parents. I have a 23 year old step-son who we raised along with his Mother and her husband. But too many hands on with that many parents......you know the saying too many cooks spoil the pot. Well it is true in this case as well. I spent my child bearing years caring for my elderly parents. So I had no time for babies, untill now. All of our family and friends know how much we wanted our own family and how badly we wanted to be a mom and dad. We were caring for everyone elses kids but never our own. So here we are and when I saw most of you are 40 and under and under.... I kind of shreeked a bit. I don't know what I thought but I was knocked off my chair. So for a few days I had to re-question this again...are we doing right by this child? Are we going to casue her harm by being older parents? Are we too old? I had older parents and I turned out fine ( mother was 43, father was 49) but I also had 3 brothers and 1 sisters.( I was the baby) I don't want this child to be an only child so we are VERY INTERESTED in hearing from anyone who adopted their first and turned around and did it again back to back...or a bit of time after. I would like to now the process of re-adopting and if money was an issue how did you manage it? Did you use the same Home Study, finger prints or did you start all over....you get the idea of what I am looking for, so if you could share your story with us we would greatly appreciate it. Thank You so much for your time.........CeeCee
Sept 2005. Signed w/agency
May 2006, Excepted baby girl
July 2006, Mother/Foster Mother Interviews done,
Waiting for Family Court report, DNA. Ready to enter PGN anyday.....

[dspakowsky]

Just a thought - I bet there are many forum friends who felt the same as you and didn't post their picture because they were thinking the same.

[TyAva]

I think that you will be able to provide your baby with a loving, stable home and that makes you a wonderful mommy! I know of a lot of people who become parents in their 40's. DH is 29 and has a 7 year old sister and we all agree that his parents (now in their upper 40's) are able to provide for her a life that dh just didn't get - both financially and emotionally. Being a certain age doesn't make you a good parent. Don't doubt yourself! Your baby is lucky to have you!

[jeannecr]

I think there are more over-40s than you know. I'm one!

[AnasMama]

Aunt Cee Cee,

You are doing the right thing! Don't worry about it for one second!

[Mindybeth6]

Awww....don't feel that way. Good parents come at all ages! It doesn't matter. My MIL and FIL have FOUR adopted siblings....our son is the same age as one of them and they do it just fine!!!!!!!

Many hugs to you!

[susanandgrace]

Hi there!

I am 37 (soon to be 38) and my husband is 43 (soon to be 44). We have one biological daughter who is 2 1/2 years old. I do NOT think you are too old. I think it is wonderful that you are willing and able to add a child into your life. Love and commitment is the main thing. And it certainly sounds like you have it.

God Bless you!

[devildogwife]

I'm so sorry you felt that way after reading the roll call! I am sure that you and your husband will be wonderful parents. My husband and I are on the opposite end of the spectrum, people (and many many agencies) think that we are too young to adopt, but I do not listen because I know in my heart that we will be great parents, just like I'm sure you know for yourself.

[Tamiswaiting]

I'm sorry you felt that way after reading the Roll Call thread. I'm 42 and single and am not worried in the least about whether I'm doing the right thing. I know I'll make a great mom .

[Mariais5]

We brought our daughter home 5 days before I turned 40. My husband is 42. We are starting the process over again now.. We do have older children, but I'm not sure that makes a difference.. I met a lady in Guatemala that was 54 and picking up two infant daughters. She was single... We all do what we feel is right for our family...

We do have to start the entire process over because it's been over a year since we had our homestudy, filed 1600-A etc...

We are really wanting to adopt a toddler this time around. Our daughter was 1 in June..

[iammonikasmom]

We have completed 3 adoptions two thru Guat within the last two years and we are 48 and 46. Yup, I am the older one. I have a 23 and 18yo stepsons, the 18yo lives with us, a 9yo, 3yo and 1yo. So you are not alone, enjoy, you have the best days to look forward to. Nancy

[Willispc]

I'm going to be 50 this year and have the same worries. All we can do is trust that God will help us every step of the way. Also, I was an only child and didn't want our son to be an only child so we recently accepted another referral! We don't have to do our homestudy or fingerprints over; just everything else.

I was glad to see there were people over 40 in the roll call. It's always nice to know you have company.

[Guatmom2006]

Oh no! I think the older we are the the better equipped we are to be parents. Not to take anything from young parents, because I think good parents come in all ages. My 12 year old stepdaughter and I (I'm 33) tease DH all the time that we're going to have to pick him up from "the home" to go to our son's graduation (DH is 40)! It is a complete tease though. I've had the unique opportunity to see him grow as a parent over the 8+ years we've been married, and I have no worries about his age or the gift of parenthood he will give our son. You have life experience that your children will benefit from. All children need is someone to care for them and who loves them unconditionally. I wouldn't worry another minute about it!

[TerriBB]

September '02 - I turned 40, my mom turned 60 and our son was born!!! You aren't too old ~ I'll be 44 when Flora gets home. I think it gives you grea perspective...what is really important for kids. I'll be 65 when she graduates from college - she can take my place in the workforce .

So many of my friends have had their kids spreadout - my bestfriends have college seniors - and they had those kids after we all graduated from college. The also have kids in early grade school.

My great grandmother had her 10th child at 45!

[caltaylor]

I didn't reply to the roll call...I am 41 and my husband is 40. We have a 17-year old and a 15-year old. Many, many people wondered why we would "want to do it all over again".

The answer was, "We weren't done!"

Being parents is the best thing we do. I like playing Santa Claus and I love legos.

Now that my son is home, honestly, I can say it is much easier this time around. I think I know myself better, I think I am a more relaxed parent, I think I appreciate my time with my son more. The harder part, is that I do get a sore back now and then, and maybe I get a little tired more quickly. But, all in all, it's wonderful having a toddler in the house again.

Coleen