[paramom]

I was wondering from those of you who have already bought babies home, did you allow grandparents to hold them when you got home or did you try to keep it more in the immediate family like mother, father, brothers, sisters? I tried to explain to my mil about the attachment issue and what our social worker said, but she thinks that is ridiculous.

[kcbailey777]

You have to follow what you think is right. I let close friends and family hold my daughter at the airport. I don't believe a few minutes in the arms of a grandparent will make any difference but it will sure make the grandparents feel good. Everyone understood it would be the last time they would be able to hold her for a while so we could bond. I stayed home for a few weeks away from others and I was the only one to feed, change, and bath her for at least 3 months.

The airport is a great place for family to be able to see and hold the baby.

Lisa

[dspakowsky]

I'll be honest, we just went about our every day life when our daughter came home, and she's doing wonderful. Yes, I am a SAHM, so I'm the one who baths, feeds, holds, etc. my daughter, but I've never avoided others from being around her. My husband also cares for her.

Ever since she's been with us, she's naturally bonded so well. I'm just saying this because I was so worried about all the things we needed to do to bond, and it has yurned out not to be an issue afterall. She'e VERY attached to me and allows me to care for her no problem. Take care.

[becky716]

My parents met us at the airport when we arrived home and our son went directly to my mom. Of course, she was bribing him with a stuffed monkey and a balloon.. lol However, he has never had any attachment or bonding issues with us. He goes to most anyone, but he knows who is Momma and Daddy are.. that's for sure!
I do think it depends on the baby though. Just go with what you feel you and the baby are comfortable with.

[iammonikasmom]

I agree that you need to follow what feels best to you. I have three, all with different levels of attachment issues, and I stood firm and personally I am glad I did. I thought my daughter from Romania had the worst attachment issues, though now I am thinking it is my latest from Guat who I kindly refer to as my velcro baby. Home almost a year, and except for mom, dad, big brother and her two sisters, you got it. No one can hold her. My in laws just love me

[KJones5]

Our baby is the first (and probably the last) baby on both sides of our family. When we got home EVERYONE was waiting for us at our house. He was passed from person to person and was a champ! NOTHING would have kept my mom from holding our baby that night NOTHING!!! He's fine and has no issues. He's been home 6 months and he clearly knows I'm mom. I'm the only one he'll kiss! When he's in need, he looks for me! He's adjusted wonderfully! I think for the first 19 days he was home we had visitors or went to visit someone. Keep in mind, we came home right before Christmas.

[Laurie5401]

We allowed anyone to hold him, because he is such a social baby (and he's attached to us very well - now that he's going through the separation anxiety stage, he'll barely go to anyone else, unless they are making him laugh!). I think you just have to see what kind of personality the babies have and go with what will make them comfortable.

[MicheleB]

We too allowed all our friends and family to hold our little ones - but our babies were really used to being held by several people being in a hogar instead of a foster family. Also, every trip we went on for visiting or pick up - we brought family with us. Our family wanted to experience Guatemala too - so they came along. It is a personal decision - I think it depends on the baby also. If he or she had a hard transition to you - his new parents, I might suggest limiting others in his life - but, if he/she didn't have a rough transition to you - why not??

Just my thoughts...

Take Care!

[widgit]

We let others hold and entertain our babies, but we made it clear that we were the only ones who:

fed, bathed, consoled, diapered, and put the kids down for nap or bed.

We also very slowly introduced visitors to the babies. This was the hardest part, but it was nice to spread out the celebration too.

[Mariais5]

We went to my mom's staright from the airport. Bryce wouldn't let anyone hold her though... She's still very picky and besides dh and her siblings, she only lets a few other adults hold her if I'm in eyesight... She just turned one and has been home for 6 months..

[WVUMom418]

I let other family members hold her but I did tell them that only my husband or myself would be feeding her or changing her diapers. She has bonded very well to both my husband and myself but she loves being held by all the family.

[jlinberger]

Oh, I was freakish. I didn't let anyone but dh and I to hold antonio for over a month. Paranoid? Controlling? Protective? Who knows. My family dealt with it, though they weren't happy. Will I do it that way again? I think I might go with how my daughter feels about it. I think I might have been a bit overboard the first time around (hey, first time parent, waited 8 years for a child- a bit like "no one touch him, he's mine!" yikes. but I was also worried about the attachment and bonding thing- he was 10 months old coming home). Do whatever is most comfortable for you.