[Foradoption]

I was wondering what any of you do with a toddler, who is my sweet precious little buttercup, but really likes to run wild in stores and if I hold this sweet buttercup, she becomes a squirmy wet fish and decides to throw a fit. When I put her down, she thrashes around on the floor and has a temper because she can't run around the store. I just give her the look as to say "at least I don't have to run around the store after you as long as your just lying on the floor!" But, I would like to know if there's anything else I can do, beside lettering her get her frustrations out while lying on the floor because she refuses to stand up, once I won't let her run around. Sometimes, its not convenient to walk out of the store when there's a temper, so I usually try to just let her have it out and just give her the look of "are you done yet?" Any suggestions?

[JohnnaMJH]

I think the most common advice for that problem would be to leave immediately when she starts either running around and/or having a tantrum. This could be very hard, especially if you need to get something, so you may have to also try to go without her if possible.

On the positive side, you could give her some sort of incentive for good behavior. Personally I don't like to reward what should be normal behavior, but that is one way to handle it.

I think everyone who has kids has had to deal with toddler meltdowns in the store at some point. It is hard!

Good luck,

[NeeNee]

Hi,

My suggestion would be to make it very clear before you go into the store that if she starts this behavior you will take the cart to the counter(service desk) and then you will leave the store and sit her in her carseat until she can behave the way Mommy wants her too.

This brought back memories of my now five year old girl. At the time she was about 16 to 18 months old and my little one would have been 2 to 4 months old at that time. The older one started throwing a fit. I waited to see if she would stop as we were half way around the grocery store at this point. She didn't. I told her we had to leave, this didn't make her any happier believe me, and I went to the desk and asked if it would be alright to leave the cart for a little bit, but I would...I stressed "would" be back to finish shopping. We went out to the car, I buckled her in her carseat and told her we would finish shopping when she was done with her fit. It took a few minutes, 10 or 15, she was done. There have been times where one or the other girl will need to be taken out, but that's how we handle it and they know they can expect that if they start that behavior when we're out.

I might suggest you save the freezer section for the end of your shopping trip just in case you have to make a trip out to the car.

Good luck!!!

[pmgor]

That is what happens with Miguel everytime. He is starting the understand that he has to hold on to the cart or my hand or else he gets buckled up. He will scream and fight so hard people must thing I'm the worst mom but he has already gotten himself lost in the store once. NOT FUN! If he won't mind then it's the store cart or the stroller. If I can't leave because I need stuff that day really bad then other people just have to stuff their ears because I simply have to shop. He is getting better but it has been plain'ole persistence that has helped with this. Stick to your guns.

[csw]

We are also having a hard time with this..esp like the last 6 months or so..
I took one forum members advice and let her help me get the item off the shelf and then she gets to take the pen and cross it off my list..so she has something to focus on and it keeps her busy..also try not to take her if she is hungry, or close to naptime etc..
With our son, he would dart off and it was dangerous..he would jump out of the cart etc..it got to the point I just couldn't take him anywhere or I would end up in tears..we had to "lock down" a store once when he did this and turns out he was in the bathroom..feet up so no one could see him in the stall..I would give him time out right in the store..promise him he could have a quarter for a treat from the machines if he listened etc..
Funny, before I had kids I would see kids having a temper tantrum in a store (mostly because of that candy at the checkout line and them not getting it) and I would say to myself..My child will NEVER act like that..
right..

Ana is 33 months old now and is getting slightly better in the store, mainly because of her getting to cross things off and I also let her have an ice pop at the end..she even helps me put food on the conveyor belt..
Good luck..its not easy..our son was the temper tantrum king..now he is a teenager and it's a whole different ballgame now!

[brandydawn]

My daughter isn't nearly to that point yet, but when she won't behave either in my arms or walking by my side she gets strapped in either cart in a grocery store or the stroller in a department store.

I make sure I have snacks, sippy cup and toys to keep her busy.

I talked to my mother just yesterday (she had five children) and asked her about tantrums since most advise you to ignore it (my husband hates this advise) and she said it was made very clear when they first started that they wouldn't be tolerated. She never ignored them, she addressed them (w/o violence) immediately.


Regards,
Brandy

[Slatond10]

I appreciate these post cause it helps prepare me and gives me advise on how to handle.


Sabrina is 17mo old and I am sure I will have to deal with this eventually. Currently we always eat before going to the grocery store that way I know she is not hungry and then I usually get her a cookie to eat while in the grocery store. They almost always have some broken ones for children in the bakery department.

I do hand her things and she puts them in the shopping cart to help me. When she is really bored with riding in the cart then she can get down as long as she pushes the cart or holds my hand.

So far this has worked... but thanks for preparing me for the day it does not.

[dyardley]

In theory, I agree with the setting expectations and leaving when the tantrums start.

That said, in reality, I bought a bag of sugar free lollipops that only made appearances when I had to get shopping done. Lollipop rules are -in the store only, only when safely seated in the cart with the seatbelt on. This is the only time that ds was allowed to have any candy other than xylitol gum (good for his teeth/preventing cavities).

DS is now 4 and I still enforce the in-the-cart rule (until he is too big) simply becuase I hate the grocery store on a good day, him wandering and helping himself to things would drive me mad.

[jennzyc]

My son is 21 months and I have the same problem. It was so bad in walmart yesterday that everyone was looking at us. The funny thing is that I didnt know it but my mother in law was in the store and on her way out saw us and said I knew that was Christopher screaming. He does that same thing. He wants to get out of the cart. I let him out and try and hold him and he squirms. Let him down, but he can't run, he dropos on the floor and starts thrashing around. I am very interested in the answers to this one.

Good luck

Jennifer

[etaag]

Watch this commercial of one mom's solution to this age old problem.

Mother of the year!

I know I wish I would have had the courage! LOL

Melissa

[jennzyc]

Melissa,

I wish I had the courage to do that cause sometimes I think it would feel so good. That is just how I feel when my son has a melt down.


Jen

[TLC]

Om My Gosh!!
That mother of the year is HILARIOUS!!
I am laughing out loud.
What other good clips do you have?
TLC

[etaag]

I have others, but not about kids (fishing and stuff). I just had to share this one with you guys. It had me laughing hard.

Melissa

[brandydawn]

Too funny! I might actually be brave enough to do something like that if I had too.

[Foradoption]

Okay, that ad was hilarious!