[DesertMom]

We have a name aleady picked out for our son when we accept the referral. However, seeing as how it's always a possibility that something could happen and we could lose the referral, I was wondering if we should hold off until further in the process before we started calling him by his new name. Did anybody wait before calling their child by their new name?

[cnshornsby]

We named Delaney long before we had a referral. We named Brea right after getting her referral. I would have changed names if we had (or do) lose one of them. They have seemed like their names from the moment I saw them. Everyone is different though. I always named my babies in utero. Some people have to see them first, which I think is crazy! A newborn never looks like a Sam or Abby or Caitlin to me! I had different girls names picked out for each of my boys. I never kept my original name, so I figured by the time a new referral came along (if I needed one), I would pick a different name.

But, to each his own. Do whatever you feel is right for you!

[Smylinatya]

We had named our first referral right away. We knew what name we wanted when we started. After we lost him, we knew we'd need a new name because the one we had chosen was our 1st referrals. When we got pictures of our 2nd referral it took us a while to figure out what we were naming him but once we did, we all started calling him that. I even asked that the foster family start calling him by our chosen name. I don't think they did...but I asked :-)

Good luck.
Jenn

[beachdreams]

We named Bailey before we received her referral. Now that we might be losing her referral, we know that if that happens we will be changing the name of our new referral because the name Bailey will always be attached to our first referral.

If we do have to accept a new referral we will temporarily call her R3.2 until we have progressed further into the process.

The R stands for our last name
3 means the 3rd member of our family
.2 means second try

[cobblehil]

I named my daughter right away -- if I had lost her (shudder) I would have picked out another name.

[geekster]

Our first adoption was basically a domestic newborn adoption and we named her Ashley Ann from the moment we were matched with the birthmom. This is what we referred to her as from git go. Once she was born we traveled and arrived at the hospital and I scooped her up. The social worker asked did we have a name picked out and I said Ashley Ann. She looked at the baby and looked at me and said Does she look like an Ashley to you? Nope! hehehehehe Her name is Camille. hehehehe

We picked Carlos's name at referral and will not be using it again with the next referral. Not sure if we will call him by the name we pick out or a nickname yet. Will have to see. I think it is easier once you see their face. Carlos just looked like a Carlos to us. Don't ask me why! It wasn't a name we had even discussed.

[brinawynne]

We had a named picked out from the beginning, but when we got our referral we decided to use his given name instead. We have yet to tell anyone what it is. It will be a surprise that we will announce when we are out of PGN and his birthmother has signed for the last time.

[jnancynancy]

Our agency told us we had to pick a name at time of referral for it to go on all the documents. I'm not sure if it is just this Guatemalan agency, but those I've talked with have been given referrals with out a name from the birth mom.

I believe if we were to loose a referral I would want to remember the first referral with the name we are thinking of now and start fresh with the next referral.

Good luck....if you see my thread I'm looking for any suggestions for little girls!

Nancy

[Bexter]

I wanted to use an ancestor's name, and settled on Eric long before his referral. When I saw his referral pictures, he didn't look like an Eric! But the name stuck, and now he looks exactly like an Eric.

[MLRJ]

We are just closing in on our names- I think we were hesitant here after losing our first referral.

MLRJ

[brink]

Names are so personal, not only for the child, but especially for mothers, I think. When our children hear us using their names, I think they need to hear our love of their name, also. For our three bios, I'd played with names from the beginning of pregnancies, narrowing it down to favorites. Not until we saw their faces, did we decide if any of the names fit. We decided on our fourth daughter's name soon after we recieved the call that a domestic birthmom had chosen our family. Since we would be meeting her in four short days and since she was alive and well and would so soon be joining our family, it somehow, seemed so much more urgent that she have a name. We went to Guatemala, armed with our favorite choices for both our two sons, both 4yrs at the time of their referrals. We felt we needed to meet and see their faces and personalities before being certain if the names fit. We took a short list to Guatemala for our 10yr old daughter in Feb. Once we chose and we were home, we began by using both her new name and the name she was used to. We dropped her Guatemalan name before much time had passed, since it was too awkward to always be using two names and she was ready for her new name by then. We've since discovered her given name is not what she was called for 10 yrs. Though it's very similar, it seems it might have been a typo. When we finalize next month, we will by then have made the final decision on her middle name(s). She hasn't really understood the concept of a middle name, though we have talked about the options. It's taken me this long to be sure to give her the middle name she will be pleased to have in years to come. It will be a variation on the spelling of her given name, to make pronunciation correct...and possibly a second middle name that I would have chosen and to make the cadence more pleasant with her new first name. My number one rule is to never tell anyone until you are absolute certain that is your child's name... for us it was after they were born or came home. My mother-in-law cured me of the desire to share their names ahead of time!

[brink]

[quote=brink]Names are so personal, not only for the child, but especially for mothers, I think. When our children hear us using their names, I think they need to hear our love of their name, also. For our three bios, I'd played with names from the beginning of pregnancies, narrowing it down to favorites. Not until we saw their faces, did we decide if any of the names fit. We decided on our fourth daughter's name soon after we recieved the call that a domestic birthmom had chosen our family. Since we would be meeting her in four short days and since she was alive and well and would so soon be joining our family, it somehow, seemed so much more urgent that she have a name. We went to Guatemala, armed with our favorite choices for both our two sons, both 4yrs at the time of their referrals. We felt we needed to meet and see their faces and personalities before being certain if the names fit. We took a short list to Guatemala for our 10yr old daughter in Feb. Once we chose and we were home, we began by using both her new name and the name she was used to. We dropped her Guatemalan name before much time had passed, since it was too awkward to always be using two names and she was ready for her new name by then. We've since discovered her given name is not what she was called for 10 yrs. Though it's very similar, it seems it might have been a typo. When we finalize next month, we will by then have made the final decision on her middle name(s). She hasn't really understood the concept of a middle name, though we have talked about the options. It's taken me this long to be sure to give her the middle name she will be pleased to have in years to come. It will be a variation on the spelling of her given name, to make pronunciation correct...and possibly a second middle name that I would have chosen and to make the cadence more pleasant with her new first name. My number one rule is to never tell anyone until you are absolute certain that is your child's name... for us it was after they were born or came home. My mother-in-law cured me of the desire to share their names ahead of time, after a very negative response to the choice I had for our first daughter! Didn't end up using it, though every part of my body wanted to go ahead with it! Changed my mind for a shorter, easier version my husband was going to be able to spell.

[bjmom]

We are in PGN, and we still haven' decided on a name. My husband wants to wait until we get out of PGN, and the birth mother signs off. We have narrowed the list down, and there is one name that if we will likely go with.