[Kate'sMom2B]

that she's already hitting the terrible twos, LOL. She just turned 15 months old.

Seriously, it seems to be a case of Dr. Jekyll/Mr. Hyde. My sweet, content angel is turning into a little devil a lot lately. I don't remember my other kids doing this, but it's been many years since I've had a baby so I may have selective memory.

She is very clingy and hangs on me whenever I'm in sight. I do have lots of one on one time during the day as my other kids are at school. She throws tantrums now...throwing herself down, kicking and screaming. Granted, it's usually when she's tired and/or hungry. She also hits, a lot! She hits the other kids and has even started pulling their hair when they have my attention. She hits me, too, when I let her know I'm not thrilled with her behavior. If I tell her no when she hits somebody, she sometimes comes and starts hitting me and sometimes pinching! She also grabs anything nearby and throws it, adding stubborn grunting noises in cases to prove her annoyance. And when I tell her no and sit her away from me when she hits, she usually just bursts into tears and comes over and lays her head on me and hugs me which just melts my heart.

She'll always be my little angel, but is anyone else experiencing this with their toddler? Any ideas? I feel like a 1st time mom all the sudden, all over again!

Thanks! (I took this picture today...with her arm raised she could be in mid-swing, I don't remember, lol).

[Smylinatya]

Sorry, I don't have any answers for you. I just wanted to say that your daughter is very pretty...even if she is about to karate chop somebody :-)

Jenn

[frodorocks]

I so know what your saying!!My dd is 20 mnths and has been the same way for quite awhile now.I took advice from Jo Frost(a.k.a the super nanny)She says that when you are disiplining to get down to their level make eye contact and tell them what is wrong with their behavior in an athoratative voice.It has been very helpful with my daughter.Hang in there!

[resabelle]

Just wanted to say I am going through it with Amanda too, who WILL be TWO in a week. She is dong everything you have described and time outs work with her, but oh it is so hard, especially when she decides to hit Mommy (she did this once). I will be watching this thread for suggestions too.

[lisainatlanta]

I think that might be Will's sister????? Ihear ya sister, keep singing those blues: at Will's school - he get's "OH NO" reports at least 2x a week!!! Why you ask? Because he's pulling other kids down and then sitting on them!!! oh yea! They asked me if he likes to watch wrestling on TV - HERE'S MR. WWF!

[kadkins]

Sam turned 15 months yesterday, and we are starting to see that problem. At Birthday party over the weekend, he made one baby boy cry and was SO rough with the other kids. I blamed myself, as me and dh play with him a little rougher than most parents and babies, but at the dr.'s office yesterday, he followed a little girl around and pinched her over and over. He smiled like he was playing with her, but he is SO rough. He is not hitting yet, but meal time is getting harder and harder. When he is finished, he slides everything into the floor. We scold him for this (as we eat out often), so he looks me directly in the eye, says "NO, NO", as he pushes it off. We never laugh at this, but it continues to get worse. He is still very lovable, just a regular little boy, I assume!

[spaypets]

Well, one thing we did was to make sure that DD didn't get tired or hungry. Naps were pretty sacred and we discovered when she dropped her morning nap she still needed a snack (usually milk) at that time. She's pretty good at being on a schedule and we took not of grouchy times and made sure we had a snack available.

The other thing we did was sign language with her so she could tell us if she wanted something--kids that age can't speak but they do have opinions. It lessons the frustration level.

Our version of a time out was to lay her on her back and walk away to the other side of the room-- she'd usually have a fit, but we told her we weren't going to deal with her while she was crying--she soon started learning how to calm herself down and say what she wanted.

Now at 3, she's charming, happy, cooperative and almost never has a meltdown.

[KDhappygal]

Yep, I know what you are going through! The first time Gabriella threw herself down of the floor kicking and screaming it was such a shock! I actually thought something was wrong with her because she had never done anything like that.

At just two years she doesn't do that so much anymore but she does hit, push and throw things. We are using time outs and it does seem to help. Our biggest problem is she won't stay in the time out spot.

Her crying tantrums are more from anger. I know this because she balls up her little fists and gets so stiff her little body shakes. She is still adjusting to the arrival of her new sister.

I have also found that telling her if she keeps crying she won't get XYZ. This works well for us around dinner time. She is often finished eating before her sister. 30-45 minutes before her sister, who is a slow eater. Gabriella wants a bath as soon as she is done dinner and will sit on the floor at me feet as I feed her sister or at the bottom of the stairs crying and screaming 'Bath' 'Bubbles' etc. Makes meal time zero fun. In the last few days I started telling her it was OK for her to cry but if she kept crying then no bath. Telling her she would have her bath as soon as her sister was done eating had no effect.

[1more2luv]

Oh boy! You couldn't have described our situation any better! Maria is a little over 14 months and we have renamed her "Sassy"!! She is really getting strong willed and can pitch a fit when she doesn't get what she wants. She also puts her head down on my shoulder when I scold her. She is now understanding that there are things out there she wants and is having a hard time communicating. Her world has become so much bigger. With my boys I feel like they would hit these stages right before a big developmental milestone. It would usually level off until the next milestone was in sight.
I, too, am trying the sign language. I checked a bunch of books out of the library. I'm willing to try anything.
We'll all be in this together.
1more2luv

[lisam951]

Marisol will be two tomorrow and though she doesn't hit, she is big into throwing things when she is not getting her way. She also is very strong willed. If I tell her to stop doing something or put something down, she will give me a look and then purposely put her hand on the item. All the time just daring me to stop her. It's actually hard not to laugh sometimes. Timeouts work well for her because is not one for sitting still too long. I have her sit in a chair and I put a timer on for 2 minutes. She knows that she has to calm down and then when the timer goes off she can get up. She also tends to be more like this when she is tired. She definitely still needs a nap in the afternoon. My older dd did not do this at 2, she waited to voice her opinions until she was about 4, so this is new to me too.

[DPline]

Originally Posted by lisainatlanta

I think that might be Will's sister????? HERE'S MR. WWF!

And I have their other brother and sister! When Daniel doesn't get his way he hits too, and tackling and sitting on his big brother is a favorite passtime. Luckly he hasn't tried it on the kids at playgroup - yet! And Lauren has the clingy Dr. Jekyll/Mr. Hyde thing down to a tee. All sweetness and light, and then . . . .
And she also prefers throwing things to hitting. Tired and/or hungry definetly is a big trigger with both of them. I do remember that 15/18 months - 24 months was by far the hardest age with my older son (at least so far! ) Once he was able to communicate well, it made a world for difference.
No real advice for you, but I feel for you and this too shall pass!

[alyssa&avery]

Well, at least I know I'm not alone..........

Avery is just over 16 months and is starting the same behavior. I guess I wasn't expecting it yet because Alyssa didn't do this until she turned 3 and it's been short lived. I was just wondering the other day who took my sweet baby boy and replaced him with a feisty toddler!?!?!?!

Avery absolutely HATES to have his diaper changed and his clothes changed/put on. He squirms, hollers, rolls, fights and yells NO, NO, NO!!!!! Honelstly changing him is like a wrestling match. But when he gets into something and I tell him no, he just smiles that beautiful smile, shakes his head no and says no, no.........and keeps right on doing it!

He also gets very, very clingy and won't let me put him down. Some days I'd like to just stick him to me with velcro so that I could get something done! He also throws his food when he's done eating.

It is some consolation to know that this will pass........ but the next phase is right behind it!

Good luck to everyone......... you're not alone!
Lori

[dian]

Ok now I am really nervous-- my little one is 13 months and very strong willed-- I am getting very nervous as to what may be coming-- I had better read up-- I like that suoer nanny idea I think I will buy her book. Thanks for the heads up!!

Diane

[TRBenson]

When Myra went through this stage, we found that consistency was the best approach. EVERY SINGLE time she hit, pinched, pushed, etc. she got a time-out. Even if it meant 15 time-outs a day. Eventually, she realized we have zero tolerance for her naughty behavior. In order to keep her in time-out, we had to physically restrain her there at the beginning. It was hard to do, and I felt cruel because she would cry and scream to get out, but I just held her there but without acknowledging her. I would not respond to her crying and screaming while I held her in time-out...I just let her have her fit and get no attention from me for her negative behavior.

The other thing that seemed to help was not using the word "NO" to her. Because eventually it lost it's meaning when you're telling her NO for every single thing. Instead, we could say "It's not nice to hit." "That's not okay." "It hurts Mommy when you hit her." "Please do not do that." Sounds kind of corny, but now when we do use the word NO, she knows we mean business!

Just a couple thoughts! It's an ongoing struggle though...Myra is 25 months and I'm still going through some of that agressive stage. Only thing is that time-out no longer works for her...she just sits there like it's no big deal...almost like it's fun or like she's mocking us. They get smart fast!! hahaha!

Brielle is daring, by the way!

[Dolphins1]

Our daughter also began this behavior at 15 months. I was at my wit's end for a while because we also brought her home at 15 months. She has just turned 2 and has calmed down, somewhat. We are now seeing some of her former sweet personality returning.

One thing I will say is that we timed her out for inapporpriate behavior and ignored her tantrums as long as she was safe.

Good luck to all.