[shorner]

I think I'm going CRAZY!!! I am torn between adopting from Guatemala and China, and every time I think I have it figured out, I hear/read something else that makes me re-think my decision!

Anyway, how did you all decide to adopt from Guatemala vs. other countries? Have any of you adopted from Guatemala and China? How do the two processes differ? I have 3 bio sons and want to adopt a daughter. I am concerned primarily about the health of the child we adopt. Originally, I was considering Russia and E.E., but have since ruled them out based on risks of FASD and RAD. I know that RAD is a risk when adopting from China, too, so that is one reason I'm leaning towards Guatemala. Are there health considerations when adopting from Guatemala that I need to factor in as well?? Any assistance would be MUCH appreciated!

Thanks in advance,
Sarah

[foxl]

can be decisive!

There is a wait for girls, from Guatemala. There is a relative dearth of boys, from China ...

Linda

[regino]

Oh my gosh, we have the exact same story! I went through the same process of deciding on a country too. I figured an EE child would look like my sons and be a physical fit for my family. But the risk of FAS greatly outweights any appearance question. Plus, we plan to celebrate her heritage and the fact that she is adopted, not try to hide it. That left, in our case, China and Guatemala. China is the country of choice in our community. She would have tons of peers. There is also a very active Asian adoption support group in our communiity. These were big pros for China. So, I began to actively research both Countries. Then I fell in love with the children of Guatemala. They are not only beautiful, but so healthy and robust. Look at the photos. Their love of life just shines through.
I also like the fact that the Spanish heritage is very much reflected in our society. Plus, the country is very accessible for her to visit as she gets older. Another plus is the escort option. I don't think we will need to use it, but with three young boys at home, it is comforting to know it is there.
Finally, the plight of the poor in Guatemala touched my heart. I will bump up a thread that takes you to an article about the horrors of poverty for children there. The thought that my daughter will be spared such a life makes it all worth while.
Good luck choosing a country. Whatever you decide will be the right decision!

[itisagirl]

when picking a agency or country look for what will work for you i am single and could not use china unlast i wanted to have a long wait list and as for guatemala i have not flown before and it is the shortest plane trip closest to the u.s.a compared to china, russia and most country that the u.s. a . have adoption ties and the time zone is about 6 to 8 month for the whole process time compared to the other country that are 18 months to 2 years and the stay in the country is 3 or 4 days campared to 1 to 3 weeks for the other countries, with.the children in foster homes instead of orphanages the children have more one on one attention for the child development and i read that for every 3 months a child is in a orphanage they could be 1 month behind for their age because there is not as much stimulation. the children are usually baby at referral with guatemala but other countries vary, the cost of the trip and hotel you will want to compare also if the money issue is a problem because that could affect the bottom line on the fees, russia you need two trips that are maybe $1000 each person and guatemala is about $800. if you have not picked a agency yet contact a few for info package and glance at them to see what is included in their fee and read the fine print because when i did not know what country i wanted to use i had info from maybe 10 agency and notice that some show fee that other did not but you would have to pay and if you add that to the bottom line it would hike up the cost to more then i planned. i wanted a girl and received a referral a month into the process so the wait for her was not long if you want a boy it is right away compared to say china girl are the available more than boys.

[chica_latina]

It's amazing to hear someone else in the same boat as us. My husband and I are trying to decide between China and Guatemala. We won't begin the adoption process for another 1.5 years so we have some time.

My husband and I are discussing this thoroughly and this is what we are considering:

* Do we have resources in our area concerning our child's culture? (such as Families with Children from China Chapter)

* How can we integrate our child's heritage in her upbringing?

* Diversity of the area we live in

* How much time we can take off work (China requires a 2 week travel for the pick up trip)

* The age of the child at referral - This will be our first child and we would like a child as young as possible.

* Also, I hate to say it, but cost.

We are still trying to decide.. We are leaning more toward Guatemala because I am Hispanic and can easily integrate her heritage in her upbringing..But we're doing a lot of praying and waiting for what God has to say.

I hope this helps.

Blessings,

Myrna

[Bonitabonita]

Hi Sarah,

Sounds like you are struggling to hear yourself. Since I don't even know you, it is probably easier for me to see something that seems obvious.

You wrote "I am concerned primarily about the health of the child we adopt." If that IS your primary concern, you will undoubtedly choose Guatemala. However, if you are confusing yourself with 100 different "priorities" . . . well . . . then, you're pretty normal!

FWIW, I am waiting for my daughter from Guatemala. I specified no gender preference, and waited 1 1/2 months with one agency. I switched agencies and received an immediate referral for Maria, who had been born 6 days prior. So, overall, there is a greater demand for girls from Guatemala, but it is the agency that determines how long your wait will be for a referral.

Best of luck . . . do try to let go of the decision-making angst as soon as possble, if you can!

Boni

[kelleymac]

Our choice wasn't between China and Guatemala, but we did everntually have to decide among three countries before we adopted from Guatemala. This sounds so awful, but what we did was make a list, rate each item and then decide how important it was to us. Here is the list we used:

Foster vs. orphanage
(related to above) Known health issues or "suspected health issues"
race (we decided we were only comfortable raising a child of caucasian or hispanic/indigenous descent)
proximity of country (travel both now and later)
"understanding" of culture

The above list led us to these three countries:

Guatemala (Hague mess last year)
Republic of Georgia (closed after we applied)
Colombia

We went all the way to dossier for Colombia and then found it was two years for an infant referral. At that same time, Guatemala had reopened and adoptions were proceeding smoothly. I think it was fate's way of getting us to Guatemala to find our son.

Best of luck...this was a decision we AGONIZED over.

Kelley

[mattecook]

Sarah,

Many people struggle with the decision of where to adopt from and others know without a doubt that they were meant to adopt from ____ (fill in the blank). For my husband and I the decision was discussed many times. I think the children from China are beautfiul but we were too young. So we moved on to Russia and that was it. We were going to adopt from Russia I guess in our minds it was either China or Russia. We were VERY new to the process and didn't understand that there were many other countries to choose from. My husband and I went on vacation were he told me that for many reasons including; FAS, length of stay, length of flight etc., Russia was not for us. I said OK?? ANyways long story short our Agency called us and after a long conversation about our desires in our child she told us to look at the Guatemala program. One that we had just skipped over many times for no reason. We turned to that page in our agencies booklet and knew that our children were there. We brought our little girl home over a month ago and can't wait to start the process again. I think this decision is very internal between you and your husband and even your immediate family.
Good luck in your decision you will not make the wrong one.

Ami

[dl]

Last June Lisa Ling did a special on the National Geographic Discovery Channel "The Lost Girls of China". It was a very well done documentary and showed the process that people go through to adopt in China. If you want to read more about that show, go to the thread "Interesting TV Program ~ "China's Lost Girls" http://forums.adoption.com/showthre...+Girls+of+China

Watching the show, one could see how much Lisa was affected by what she saw and learned. Oprah is having Lisa on her show today and from the preview it appears that Lisa returned and adopted a little girl herself.

While I'm not at all connected to China Adoption, I found the story very interesting. What these little children, mostly girls, in China go through before being adopted is so sad.

Anyway, just wanted to give a "heads up" to those that might be able to catch "Oprah". In my area "Oprah" repeats late at night and I set my VCR if the show looks interesting.

To those that are "trying to decide", this might give you some perspective.

[dixiemom]

if you spoke with some agencies who have both a China and a Guatemala program. That way you could ask questions or voice concerns and you'd have someone who is familiar with both to sound off of. Just a suggestion. I know the agency we are using handles both programs and although we thought about China for only a short amount of time before switching to Guatemala, it was so nice to know that we had a great agency behind us whichever we chose.

Best wishes!

[Devora]

We went through this for a short while when we were deciding between Guatemala and Korea. In both countries children are mostly in foster care (therefore, fewer developmental and social delays/risks) and they both tend to come home at fairly young ages.

The advantages to the Korean program were that they have excellent medical care, the program is SO stable and there's no dossier required (just a homestudy). These were good points for us.

But when we thought about our priorities in terms of what would make things easier (potentially) on us in the short-term versus would would be better for our child in the long-term, it was clear that Guatemala was our choice. The fact that our child will have Hispanic/Latino aunts and cousins weighed FAR heavier than the fact that we would have an easier adoption process with Korea. Short-term anxiety for us is nothing compared to the long-term well-being of our child.

That doesn't mean that if we had adopted from Korea it wouldn't have worked out well. Our families would love our child, we would still celebrate our child's background, and we would find Korean role models outside of our family. But you have to make a choice at some point!

I think Boni had a good point about trying to figure out your TOP priorities versus the 100 other considerations. For us that's what made the decision clear.

Good luck!
Devora

[thesojourners]

We are on the fence with the same decision. China is much cheaper (15-18K vs 20-28K) and their program is very, very stable. We don't mind the extra time before a referral (we're hearing 6-8mos) . . . compared to the anguishing wait AFTER the referral in Guatemala (for how long???) while the folks in PGN review the paperwork multiple times. Also, assembling the correct paperwork for China seems a bit simpler, especially since we are living outside the US right now. (It will be quite difficult to re-collect documents that PGN could kick out.)

BUT our older daughter is Hispanic, we speak Spanish, we can travel to Guatemala in the future. . . so we're headed that direction at the moment. We may change course, though . . .

Good luck with your decision!

Anne

[shorner]

Thank you all SO much for your feedback... I can't tell you how much it meant to me!

This is a very tough decision to make, and I guess what's hardest about it is that I'm sure we'd be thrilled if we adopted from either country. There are definite advantages to each, and the things that are great about Guatemala (travel, foster-care, general health of babies, etc.) make it incredibly attractive to me. My DH is also very drawn towards Latin American culture, and has always wanted to travel to Guatemala.

All this being said, however, I somehow feel in my heart of hearts that China is where I'm supposed to go... Believe it or not, I think it stems from a 60 Minutes story on Chinese orphanages that I saw just after I gave birth to my oldest son in 1995. I was incredibly moved by the plight of all these sweet little girls who had been abandoned and were alone in the world, and I recall thinking to myself that if I never had a daughter biologically, that I should pledge to adopt one someday...

Anyway, we will think about it some more before we make our final decision -- and perhaps next week I will have resolved for good to adopt from Guatemala again! I just want you all to know what a wonderful, supportive, insightful group you are, and that I truly appreciate all your words of wisdom. I definitely came to the right place with my questions!!

If anyone has additional feedback -- or if the people who are still on the fence about adopting and would like to share experiences -- please feel free to PM me anytime... I'd love to chat more about the adoption journey!

Take care,
Sarah

[Gabby's Mom]

Good luck with your decision---

I had always wanted to adopt a little girl from China ever since in middle school I learned about the child quotas and the abandoned little girls. I just knew I would someday adopt. My husband and I discussed it even before we were married. We decided to start our adoption journey, and went to the first class where the social worker did an overview of different country's adoption programs. Neither my husband or I said much. We got back in the car and he said, "Well, what did you think?" And I said---"I think we should adopt from Guatemala." He was so relieved because he felt the same way. For us, it was the foster care, the travel and the health of the children among so many other things. I just knew in my bones that Guatemala was the right decision for us. It's funny--because I had always imagined my family with a little Asian girl as the youngest....now I can't imagine our family without my little Latin beauty! She is meant for us, and us for her, I truly believe.

There is obviously no right or wrong choice---search your heart and follow your gut. Your daughter is out there; you just haven't found her yet!

Good luck on your adoption journey, and keep us posted on getting your daughter if she is from China or Guatemala.

Maria

[sak9645]

... I am the older single Mom of a wonderful daughter from China. I adopted her when she was 18.5 months old, and she is now 9 years old! We are having a great time.

I'd be delighted to talk with you about any of your questions/concerns about China adoption, raising a Chinese child, etc. So please don't hesitate to contact me.

Since this is a Guatemala board, feel free to e-mail me at sak9645@starpower.net.


Sharon