[neenasee]

We are going to be taking our first trip in the next few weeks. I was just wondering for those of you who took your first trip, did you call your baby by the name he was given at birth or the name you are going to call him? Our little boy is going to be 6 months old when we visit. Thanks!
Nina

[Ozwald]

I used a combination. I don't think the Foster moms are calling the boys by the names we chose... So when we visited, I combined the names... when I was playing with Eli (the name John and I chose) I would talk to him and say.... Eli Jose Miguel. Same with Nic.... I would call him Nicolas Antonio.

[RaeLynn]

I would ask the foster family to start calling your baby by the name that you are giving him. They are usually very happy to comply!
Raelynn

[tinaedmond]

I agree with RaeLynn, usually if you ask your foster mother will call the child by the name you have chosen for him or her. This doesn't always work, tho.

However, by 6 months of age I'm not quite sure a baby knows their name yet, so I don't think it really matters (to the baby, that is!)

Tina

[Ozwald]

We did ask our agency from the beginning to ask the Foster Moms to call them by the names we chose. I asked the Foster Moms again (via translator) if they would call the boys these names when we visited 3 weeks (has it been that long??? ago). I really liked the Foster Moms as they both had a very close connection to each child. I don't think the name transition will be a big deal anyways.

Jen

[kelleymac]

We called him Jonah while we visited, although we did refer to him as our "angel" which was his given name.

We asked the facilitator to request that his foster parents call him Jonah, but in retrospect, I'm not sure we could have chosen a more difficult name to say for a native-Spanish-speaker. (no hard "j"s in Spanish. We think they probably still call him Angel, but I know he will transition.

Best of luck,
Kelley

[Gabby's Mom]

We used a combination of her birthname and the name we had chosen for her. We kept her birth name as her middle name.

We also asked the foster mother what nicknames she called her. It was a nice little tidbit of history to be able to tell Gabby later on what nicknames they had for her. Her foster mother called her "coochie-coochie" and her little "gorditas"---our translator said that means little 'fatty' and Gabby sure does have a healthy appetite!

Have a great trip,
Maria

[Chrysanthemum]

I visited my dd at 3 months. I called her by the name I gave her. I did find out that at the hogar they called all of the baby girls "Nina'" which, I believe, is baby girl in spanish.

[szumbiel]

I visited when our son was, 5 months, 8 months,10 months, and 12 months. Every time I referred to him as his given name of Jose Manuel. During the older visits, he responded to that best. His foster family called him that as well as muchacho bonito--pretty boy!

We had long before he was born chosen the first name of Martin and wanted to call him Marty. We had agreed to keep part of the given name as his middle name. Then, we loved Jose Manuel, so we ended up naming him Martin Jose Manuel. We still thought we would call him Marty.

Then our case was caught in FC#3, Hague issues, etc... and the older he got, the more I found myself sticking with Jose as what I called him. Had I known he would come home over 12 months old, I would have kept his given name only.

Now, most people call him Marty and I do when we are around others. Yet, I still call him Jose quite a bit. Of course, my bio. kids have so many nicknames too that I guess he will just adjust like they do.

[shmouse]

For what it's worth, I'm reading a book now on child language development, and there have been numerous studies that show that children do recognize their own name, starting at about 6 months old.

We're keeping the name for our kiddo.

Best!

[crathke]

Our first visit was our pickup trip--and we began calling our son by his "new" name the day we met him. (never any troubles with making the switch, either--but that may be in part because his birthname and "new" name sounded similar)

We didn't ask the hogar to call him by his new name--in the event that something happened and the adoption fell through, we didn't want any confusion on his part. Secondly, out of respect for the hogar, we still refer to him (in letters and on picture captions) by his birthname, which is how they knew (and loved) him.

Finally, this last January, when the family visited our home, they began to call him "Aaron"--but we could tell it was a huge adjustment for them. (and, like Kelley said, I think "Aaron" is a little tough for them to wrap their tongues around--they want to roll the "r")

We also have multiple nicknames for our kids, and they respond to all of them (almost--I have been informed that "snickerdoodle" is no longer cool for my 8 year old); if I had visited, I think I would have called him either his birthname or just "sweetie", "sport" or any of those other nonsense ootsie-wootsie names that seem to tumble out of a mother's mouth without prior editing. Which probably would have confused him even more.

[kelleymac]

OMG, seriously...talk about nicknames! Poor Jonah will probably never know his given name...so far at home he is:

JMac
Baby J
JonahMac


Everytime I come up with a new one, my husband just rolls his eyes at me!!

Kelley

[Kimberj71]

We refered to our little ones by their given names which are also the names we're keeping for them. So that was an easy one for us. And believe it or not, Jeremy is pronounced the same way both in Guatemala and in the U.S. That kind of surprised me!

I have to laugh about the nickname thing! Londy's fostermom has soooo many nicknames for her! Mi Guapita (I think that was what it was)...my beauty I think it means and mi princessa Maya (my Mayan Princess) were my two favorites! Londy seemed to love all of them, then I think it was probably because it was her Mama' talking to her.

Nicknames are great for kids and I think. And it saves me too! I can always use one of my children's million nicknames and more than one will look at me! lol Talk about convient!!!

Have fun with naming and nicknaming your little ones. It's always a joy!!

Kim

[crathke]

Kelley--your husband may roll his eyes, but at least you haven't had something as awful as "Aaron-bo-Baron" pop out of your mouth! Even *I* cringe at that one!!

My husband's friends call him "Rat" (a derivitive of our surname) so there are times when we have "Ratlings", too! (I wanted to use "Lady Rat" as my user ID here but my husband thought that was "goofy" so I went with the boring ID instead)

Nick is "my darling boy" and Aaron is "my sweet prince" or my "Mayan Prince"--in addition to all the cringe-worthy nicknames!

[Kate'sMom2B]

That's too funny Courtney!!!

To those considering asking the fostermom's to begin using their new name, make sure they are pronouncing it right! With Kate, our fostermom was happy to oblige...and then months later when I heard her pronounce it she called her "Cott-tay", LOL.
When I visited, I referred to her as Kate when talking with other parents and my son, but to get her attention I would usually say, "Gladys", her given name, or "Chiquelina" her nickname used by her fostermom.

Oh my, my kiddos really have had some nicknames throughout the years...not well thought-out ones, but things that just come out of a mother's mouth...like Piper, Tootsie Pop, Pooey, Pooey-Lup, Poopin' Lup, ok you get the idea. Often it's just nonsense but becomes so fun to say.


To this day my 7.5 yo son Brychan is often called mostly by his nickname "Cheech". This name *evolved* from other nicknames when he was a baby, and it really stuck. And it had nothing to do with that famous movie either!