[diamondinruff55]

I got a voice mail today from my half sister telling me that my birth mother has passed away. I met my birth family 10 years ago and got to know my birthmother a bit.

I dont know what to feel. I feel - empty, but not having the strong emotions that one would feel upon news of a mother passing away. I feel very weird and dont know if I should grieve....or how!!!

Any one else gone through this, and should I contact my birth family or leave them alone? I feel Im an outsider and should respect their privacy during this time, but at the same time, the person was my closest relative still living, and now she is gone. My adoptive mom died 4 years ago.

Well, I think the fact that your half sister called you to let you know makes it okay for you to contact them. But if you really feel uncomfortable and like you would be intruding, wait a week or so and then contact them. That will give them some private time, but also allow you to be part of the grieving process.

My suggestion of a way to grieve for her would be to write a letter to her...get out your feelings toward her, any regrets you had, and say goodbye to her. I think that's a good, personal outlet for grief if you are worried what others will think about the way you grieve.