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I am just beginning to look into the adoption process and wonder why it is so complicated and expensive. All the time I hear about people abandoning newborns in trash-cans and on the freeway, yet here I am - happily married for 5 years (with lots of experience with children as the oldest of 12 and many years as church nursery worker,baby sitter and now as a nanny)desperately wanting to have a baby of my own or one of these that are thrown away and I find that I have to be rich and jump through legal "hoops" just so that I can have what someone else has thrown away!

Any help or encouragement to continue in this process?

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Originally Posted By Lori

First, you have to remember that children aren't given to just those who deserve them. Life isn't fair that way, I had many years to think about that! I too felt that I deserved a baby more than those people who just abandoned or neglected their children. But, unfortunately, nature doesn't work hat way.

You have to look at the positive reason that adoption is so complicated. They are doing what is best for the child. If birth parents had to go through such a complicated process as well, we wouldn't have the abuse you hear about on tv and in newspapers. Just think about how lucky your future child is to be going to a safe, secure, and loving family. The agencies have to do all of the security checks to ensure that.

As far as the costs go, it is pretty high. If you look at adopting an older or special needs child through your county, you would find much smaller charges. For infants though, it is quite costly.

Good luck, and don't lose spirit.