[Bella082]

Hi everyone. We are getting started with our Home Study for a domestic infant adoption. Unfortunately, my husband has a few alcohol-related misdemeanors from when he was younger, the most recent being 7 years ago, which is dropped from his record due to court supervision. All of this was before we met, however it will obviously impact our home study. We have been up front with our agency all along so they are aware of it, however, is this something the birth mother will find out? Do birthparents see the background checks? If so, I would rather be upfront about it rather than be passed over because she sees this in our home study. Any advice would be greatly appreciated.

[tweetybirdus]

Expectant mothers do not see your homestudy or background checks. The homestudy is just for the agency to determine that you are fit to raise a child. Also, during finalization, the judge may read it. I think that if you've been open and honest with the agency and they're still working with you to go through the application and homestudy process, you have a great chance that you'll be approved.

I really think that it's totally up to you if you want to tell the emom about it. The agency shouldn't disclose it.

[belleinblue1978]

Originally Posted by tweetybirdus

I really think that it's totally up to you if you want to tell the emom about it. The agency shouldn't disclose it.

How could you not tell an emom about that? That was something that I did ask, and I expected honesty as I was asked about my criminal background. I would be hard pressed to choose a couple with several alcohol related convictions, old or not.

[tweetybirdus]

Maybe I should clarify what I meant.

I just meant that it is not the agency's place to disclose this sort of information. It's up to the the PAPs.

Our agency didn't tell S's bmom what was in our background check and they didn't tell us all about bmom either. I wouldn't expect them to. I think it's up to the people involved to discuss it or not.

[minibus]

Originally Posted by tweetybirdus

Expectant mothers do not see your homestudy or background checks.

I think that depends on the agency. Ask your agency. Our children's birth mother said that she read our homestudy. Now, whether she read our actual homestudy, or our profile, I'm not 100% sure - it didn't matter to me, so I didn't clarify.

[GoddessDanu]

I agree that you should be up front about it when meeting the emom but I don't think it's going to be an issue for you. We all do stupid things when we're younger and as we get older and settle down we're more wiser. I couldn't imagine that an emom wouldn't understand that.