[Vogi2002]

I thought it would be helpful to all the people just starting to hear from some parents about why they picked thier agency and what was most important for them.

Remember, no agency names here, just advice on what to look for in an agency and questions to ask.

Natalie

[Vogi2002]

I will start:

First off during my research, I thought that cost was most important. The more research I did, although it was still top of the list, it was more important how ethical they were.

Some things I looked for (and looking back SHOULD have looked for):

Cost - I personally didn't feel comfortable paying birthmother expenses to specific birthmothers. There are agencies that have a "flat" fee and that is what we wanted.

Knowledge and understanding of Open Adoption - Once we decided on open adoption we wanted an agency that educated thier aparents and bparents on this. We wanted an agency who would be there for us if we had any questions or problems.

Birthmother counseling - it was important to find an agency that counseled thier birthmothers CORRECTLY. I didn't want to feel as though they were coerced.

Ratio of Placements to PAPS - I didn't want thier to be 100 PAP's when the agency only does 18 placements a year, I also wanted an agency that would keep to this ratio, even if it meant turning away future PAP's.

The involvement and help during the whole process - how involved they were and how helpful they would be during each step (match, meeting, birth, etc).

Okay, that is the basic start of what I found during my research (and it took me a LONG time to research, but stick to your guns as to what is most important to YOU and you will find the right agency for your family). In the end, I found many agencies that fit my bill, and in that case I went with the one that I "jived" with the best.

Hope this helps!

Natalie

[emmaalso]

Great post wish I had read one like it before I started my research!

I did request information from a lot of agencies and PM's people who said nice things about the agencies they had used and others who had recently adopted fairly quickly.

I then looked at price. Although I was/am OK with paying birthmom expenses to some degree I didnt want an agency who charged astronomical fees. I also wanted to know that I would likely be able able to adopt in under a year.

After narrowing it down to just a few I received a call from one of the agencies on my short list and decided that was the one for me. I liked the lady who called and she became my coordinator.

[tweetybirdus]

I went to their website and looked it up and down, liked what I saw, how much info they put into their site.

We decided to go to one of their free information meetings and we were impressed by the level of commitment they have to expecting mothers. It was important to us that they counseled expecting mothers and tried to help them to find a way to parent before helping them form an adoption plan.

It was also important to us that they require parenting classes for all adoption programs. We also chose our agency because they offer to help find skilled attorneys for both PAPs and expecting women and they offer services for both as well, such as counseling, support groups, and classes. There was one other aspect that "sealed the deal" so to speak, the agency we chose will not turn away from a child in need regardless of the circumstances, mental and physical health, or for any other reason.

They also have a very low caseload, so each sw isn't overwhelmed trying to accomodate too many PAPs at once.

We also felt that a sliding scale fee schedule, based on income, was an important factor.

And we just have an overall good feeling about this agency.

I hope this helps someone out there. And if you want to know more about this agency please PM me.

Kat

[babydubs5]

we chose ours based on a few main points:

*the people at our agency were so personable and caring: they genuinely liked talking with us. It is a smaller agency, so they personally handled everything and they know us.

*cost. i did not want to pay 18K just for a placement fee on top of everything else.... it seemed absurb to charge that much!!! our agency is so much more reasonable, even if we did have search for our PBM on our own (which has worked out great so far)

*adoption views. They are very much in favor of open adoption, and do a lot of Aparent and PBparent counciling on adoption and all of the complex emotions and such. they don't push their views on us.

*support: they've provided so much support and flexibility with us.... they have been wonderful. I went in this week to talk to the coordinator about the PBM we're working with, and she was wonderful... she wanted to talk about everything, and really made me feel good about it. She's since emailed me and followed up to make sure I got all of my ?s answered by the lawyer today.
They've also been really flexible with our schedule since Josh's work schedule has been awful.

mainly, we just felt comfortable with everyone in the office. it was a nice feeling.

[StorkWatcher]

Nat - GREAT idea for this thread!

We wanted:

• in state (to cut down on travel and travel expenses)
• Christian-based was a huge plus
• # of expectant mothers currently working w/ them was a good ratio to # of waiting families
• relatively low fees
• fairly short wait time
• counseling and ongoing support for ALL involved

Beyond that, after receiving several info packets and talking to some people on the phone, going to the different free info sessions offered by each agency helped us find that one that we really connected with and felt we could form a relationship with.

[mommamarci]

We should have done more. My two main criteria were estimated wait time and cost. I talked to references, I looked at the website, I asked questions, but I was so naive then. Now, I would still say cost and estimated wait time would be important, but treatment of expectant parents would be even more so. (The agency we chose insisted on calling them birth parents even before giving birth and required all letters to be addressed Dear Birth Mom. Yuck!!) I also think agencies should require training or education for some people. My husband and I do not have a single friend or family member (outside of the ones I have met online and become close to!!) who has been touched by adoption and definitely no one that has been touched by transracial issues. Our agency did not even reccomend we read books or anything. Looking back I feel like as long as we were willing to pay them, they did not care and would give us a baby. How did they know we were prepared for transracial adoption issues?

I would like to say next time we will be so much pickier, but cost will still have to play a huge role...

[Vogi2002]

momma- that is funny you say that about the research. Our agency made us do research (read 3 books out of the "recomended" list and go to seminars they gave, etc) and that is one thing I thought, when first learning of they required this, WHATever, that just stinks, just one more thing to do. Well looking back thank the LORD they did because I would not be prepared otherwise.

Looking back I wish I would have known that it was something to look for. If they require the aparents to be educated, than you can be a little more reassured that they know what they are doing.... plus it will help you to be prepared, thier job should be preparing BOTH the expectant parent AND adoptive parent on adoption, IMO. Thanks for reminding me of that, GREAT point!

Natalie

[Gemqueen]

I am so overwhelmed with everything that I am not sure where to start. I live in Korea and am not sure how it all works from here if we were to adopt from China or possibly Vietnam or the Phillipines. We were told that Korea is very difficult even if you live here.

I have requested quite a few packets through the mail and even when I look at them I am not sure which to go with. We just do not want to choose the wrong one.
We adopted a little girl in Hawaii (Foster to Adopt) in July. Wish we could do that here.