[hopeful3]

Hey - This is my first time on the site. We have been on the adoption journey for 11 1/2 months. We are starting to get discouraged. Will we ever get picked? Some days I'm very positive and other days I not sure it will ever happen. Any advice?

[jheald]

My first question is what are you waiting for? A full CC infant of a specific gender? Waiting varies and many times your specifications will make the wait longer or shorter. It's hard waiting to be matched. If your agency isn't providing much action with your profile I'd sure be looking into someone else for help. We actually used and agency and had just started to enlist an adoption attorney into the mix when our success occured.

Janet

[myccg2004]

I know it's easier said than done but you need a lot of patience when it comes to adopting. Our time from beginning (first mtg with lawyer) to end (taking home our beautiful son) was 16 months. We had a few situations early on in our process but they didn't work out. Some our choice, some the birthfamilie's. I thought we would NEVER find that perfect match. But one Saturday afternoon we were just hanging around the house and the phone rang. 8:00 the next morning we were on a plane to pick up our son. I couldn't believe it !! Sometimes I still can't! It will happen for you. That I can say. I tried to take the time we had, ALONE, and do the things we wouldn't be able to do for a long time ( long weekend trips, dinners out, movies, etc...) That kind of helped. But my mind was constantly wondering "will this ever happen?" It did and afterwards that 16 month wait didn't seem long at all.

Good Luck in you adoption journey. It WILL happen for you!

[cathy102]

Originally Posted by hopeful3

Hey - This is my first time on the site. We have been on the adoption journey for 11 1/2 months. We are starting to get discouraged. Will we ever get picked? Some days I'm very positive and other days I not sure it will ever happen. Any advice?

I am with the other poster. What type of things are you looking for in your child? Do you want a certain gender? Are you only willing to adopt a CC baby? Sorry for asking. We were specific with our first adoption. After we weren't getting matched after 8 1/2 months, we were opened to more Ethnicity in a baby. After we did that, we were matched 1 week later and our daughter was born in 6 weeks on my Husband's birthday... I think the more open you are with ethnicity and gender, the faster things will happen (JMO). My daughter was born Multi-Racial...AA/CC/Hispanic/American Indian..

Our second adoption happened so fast... We were matched in 1 month and born 7 weeks later. My son was supposed to be Bi-Racial and ended up Full CC with blonde hair and blue eyes...



Best of luck to you!!!

[Kristenwes]

Hi. My husband and I have been foster-adopt parents for several years. We are still awaiting a child or sibling group. We started with one agency and they were only getting children 10 years and up. We had a great desire to adopt children under 10 years old. We switched agencies. Now, we started all over again. We actually have been getting calls for possible matches. I guess it depends on the agency you work with. We noticed a huge difference with our new agency. There are many children out there and that is what is so frustrating to us. We started doing some networking on our own. The agencies are shocked when we call offering to take in these children. I don't see any reason why they would be shocked because we have an approved homestudy, very nice home and comfortable life. Keep praying for a child. God hears our prayers, unfortunately it's not on our time, it's on His time.

[tobeafamily]

Welcome,

If you're not doing your own personal networking and searching, consider it. For us, it helped relieve the 'not knowing' stress because we at least felt we were DOING something.

I've got a list of things we did, if you like, send me a PM and I'll send it to you.

Hang in.

Regina