[Joyful Momma]

Ok guys and gals, I'm stumped. I've searched the net for info on this and am hoping one of the "adoption experts" can chime in.

A friend (who knows we adopted- doesn't everyone since I loudly and frequently advocate for waiting kids LOL) called with a question. Several years ago, her stepchild (who has a minor juvenile record and numerous issues) reported them (she and her hubby) for abuse. He also had his aunt do the same at the same time. CPS (Child Protective Svcs) came and investigated their home and found them to be "unfounded complaints". They went through the system and got the stepchild into anger mgmt classes, etc.

They have found out they probably can't conceive now. They want to adopt. Before they have the homestudy conducted (and flush money down the toilet), they want to know if this will affect them. They have other children who are perfectly happy and content who can testify (and have to CPS) that life there is great.

Does this vary by state? What are the rules on CPS complaints? I know that if someone is "charged" or "convicted", then it stands on record. What about anonymous complaints or "unfounded complaints"? Where do I tell her to start?

I'm clueless on this one. I feel terribly for her-- she's lost in this. Any help would be greatly appreciated.

[LisaCA]

hi,

i'm not an expert by any means, but the fact that it was investigated and declared unfounded complaints is in your favor. I would discuss this up front with the agency before agreeing to a homestudy, they should be able to say whether they think she should go forward. My guess is that it will be fine, esp. since stepdaughter has entered anger management classes, etc. even better if this child is willing to write a letter about what she was thinking at the time.

tell your friend best of luck!

Lisa

[tobeafamily]

Your friend should disclose this in the initial interview/discussion with the social worker.

Unfounded complaints are just that - there is a record of the complaint being registered, investigated and found not valid/credible/in existence. Further, the parents in this case did not abandon the child who made the complaint, they got him the help he needed.

What's important is to be upfront and honest. Teh SW will also be impressed if they talk about what they learned from the experience, what they would do if it happened again, etc.

JMHO

Regina

[missyB77]

I agree with all of the above. They should be honest and unfront because I personally don't think that should hold them back.

[Joyful Momma]

This pretty much sums up what I was thinking too. the question is, how do I go about verifying this? Does anyone have a clue? Is there a website with this type of data (like what is included in a background check or homestudy) or a number to call?

She and her hubby are really stressing about this, and I'm anxious to give her some good news. I just don't want to give her the WRONG good news, and then her find out later that I was completely off base.

And off topic, if you're an adoptive parents, how long after you adopted did you suddenly find yourself the neighborhood guru of adoption? People I don't even know sometimes call and say "well I'm a friend of so-and-so and they said you might be able to help me...I have this question about adoption" LOL I think I need to go back to college and get an "adoption degree".

Many thanks to everyone who's helping me...

[tobeafamily]

Originally Posted by Joyful Momma

This pretty much sums up what I was thinking too. the question is, how do I go about verifying this? Does anyone have a clue? Is there a website with this type of data (like what is included in a background check or homestudy) or a number to call?

She and her hubby are really stressing about this, and I'm anxious to give her some good news. I just don't want to give her the WRONG good news, and then her find out later that I was completely off base.

They can probably call the department of Social Services in their state and speak to someone there. The courts have a minimum requirement that constitutes a 'satisfactory' home study - results of criminal and CPS reports are an element.

They could also talk with an experienced adoption attorney - one who would also know what's generally considered 'out' or 'in'.

Originally Posted by Joyful Momma

This And off topic, if you're an adoptive parents, how long after you adopted did you suddenly find yourself the neighborhood guru of adoption? People I don't even know sometimes call and say "well I'm a friend of so-and-so and they said you might be able to help me...I have this question about adoption" LOL I think I need to go back to college and get an "adoption degree".

Many thanks to everyone who's helping me...

LOL. I think it was about a week after we brought Ryan home.

Regina