[JenniferB11]

We have been with our facilitator for just over 4 months and today we got our update and I am not sure what to make of it! We have been shown 12 times since we contracted - some of those moms have not made a decision on a family yet. Is that bad? At first I was excited to think we have been shown and that we have some profiles out right now but then the obsessive part of me came into play and I started thinking wow 12 people have seen our profile and passed - is that a lot to say no? Is there something wrong with our profile etc? Has anyone else been through this and if so does 12 seem like alot to pass on us?? Thanks for any help!!!

[BrandyHagz]

Jenn,

That depends...do they show ALL of the profiles to EVERY pbmom that inquires? I know the agency I worked with (when I placed) did. I think some agencies/facilitators do. You might want to ask about that...

If that isn't the case, then maybe you should ask for some feedback on your profile on the Networking forum...there are a TON of helpful people here who might be able to point out some issues that you might not be aware of.

Either way, I wouldn't get to freaked...sometimes it just takes some time

[kllee4]

I personally wouldn't be too worried about it. There are so many factors that can be attributed to you being seen. One positive I thought of is that maybe your family is one that would be sought after by a majority of bmoms that they are currently working with, or, like Brandy said maybe your agency has a policy that they make it a "free for all" for the moms to see everyone waiting.

Our agency only sends out the profiles that the moms ask for. We have been shown 3 times in a year. I almost freaked out, too, feeling that something must certainly be wrong with our family when I found out that they haven't had too many moms this year, the fact that we are requesting gender and some moms don't know the gender, and the fact that 8 baby boys have been born an placed in this time.

Hang in there. I know that it's tough, but don't overanalyze it too much or you'll drive yourself crazy. I stay positive by thinking that there is a child out there that is meant to be with us. We'll find her soon and so will you!

[JenniferB11]

Thanks for the help!! She only sends out our profile if the potential birthmom matches our criteria. And yes, our criteria is pretty narrow as far as race is pretty narrow and our budget is on the smaller range so I am thinking that the other adoptive parents she works with would also be shown with us as well. So I did think of those factors as well. Thanks again!

[santitam]

i think 12 times be shown is great. we have been waiting since january as well, but our agency has only shown us about 3 times, so we contacted a facilitator and she has shown us 4 times in the last month. to me the more times its shown the better chance of matching.
my criteria is also pretty narrow...but i was hoping a hispanic baby would not be this hard to find.

waiting since 1/05 sandra