[MMC66]

Hi, I'm new to this site. My husband and I matched with a birthmom 2 weeks ago. She is due October 21. I have just about everything I need and now we just wait. I'm terrified the birth mom might change her mind. She is 39 and has no children. We have talked to her on the phone twice and she sounds very firm in her decision, our social worker thinks she is committed to this as well but I'm still scared. I have biological kids but have never adopted - hard to know what to expect - would love to have someone in the same boat to talk to.

Also, the baby is a little girl (mom had an amnio). The birth father is African American and birth mom is white. So I am trying to learn as much as I can about transracial adoption as well.

Thanks for listening :-)

[sherryk]

Hello!

Congrats on your match! That is wonderful! We have some similarities. My husband and I also had biological children before we adopted. We also adopted a girl of a different race so we are experienced in transracial adoption. We have been adoptive parents now for four years. Our oldest is 11 and our youngest is 5 (we have four!)

I would love to write back to you. Let me know of your specific fears/questions and I would love to answer!

Blessings,
sherryk
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[MMC66]

Talked to bmom on Tues pm - she seemed depressed. No hint of second thoughts, just generally sad. I can't imagine what she is going through right now. She has decided to have her tubes tied so this will be her first and only baby. She told me she bought the baby a teddy bear. She is worried she won't get pics and letters after the baby is born - I reassured her that we will provide her with all the letters and pictures that she needs. I feel so sad for her but at the same time am terrified that she could change her mind (even though I know how selfish that is). she is doing a great job getting all the necessary prenatal care and taking really good care of herself. She just has so little support right now.

Touched base with social worker this morning, she seemed a little "put out" and said - I know you have never done this before but we do it all the time and everything will be fine. Felt just a little patronized. I'm hanging in though - enough laundry to keep me busy today

[sherryk]

Hi there!

So sorry the sw did not respond well to you the other day. I know this is a scary time. Your dreams are just around the corner...meanwhile, you know the birthmother needs support and encouragement with what she is going through.

Hang in there! Read up on different adoption related things. Do you subscribe to Adoptive Families magazine? I highly recommend it! Do you have an adoption support group? Do you know of someone personally who has adopted? These types of things will help you while you wait for your baby's arrival.

Keep us posted!

Blessings,
sherryk
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