[awheeler]

We are just getting started in the adoption process. We are hoping to adopt a male toddler from Mexico. Is there anyone out there who has adopted from Mexico without using an agency just a Mexician lawyer??

[sak9645]

It is very easy to lose money and undergo heartbreak when adopting from Mexico. If you are going to do it, you will face less risk if you find a reputable American agency or attorney who can help you.

First off, there are a lot of phonies trying to "assist" with Mexican adoption. They may overstate their credentials and contacts, use unethical and illegal tactics, or simply abscond with your money. If you do go with a Mexican attorney, or with an American agency or facilitator or lawyer, be sure to contact the U.S. Embassy in Mexico to see if it has any information it can share on whether the individual or organization is reputable. Also get lots of references from satisfied families.

Remember that, if you have a complaint, you basically will be out of luck if you choose an American facilitator who is not licensed by a state and not a member of the Bar in good standing, or if you go with a Mexican attorney. There is no one who can yank his/her license, so he/she has no incentive to practice in a legal and ethical manner. And if you use a foreign lawyer or facilitator, you won't even be able to file a lawsuit, in most cases, to recover lost money.

If you do go with a Mexican attorney, make sure that he/she is familiar with the laws, and has good contacts, in the Mexican state from which you plan to adopt. Each state has different laws and/or procedures.

If you do go with a Mexican attorney, also make sure that he/she thoroughly understands and complies with U.S. immigration law. You have to understand that adopting a child from a foreign country doesn't automatically grant that child the right to enter the U.S. Too many families find this out after falling in love with a child.

The child must qualify as an "eligible orphan" under the definition of the U.S. Immigration and Nationality Act. Just because a child is currently living in an orphanage doesn't automatically mean that he/she qualifies. And if a child is born to married parents who relinquish him/her to an attorney, that child doesn't qualify, because he/she is not an orphan. Remember that, if you adopt a child who does not qualify for an adoption visa, you would have to live overseas with him/her for two years in order to apply for a regular visa for him/her to enter the U.S.

Obviously, the child must be obtained legally and ethically, and must be adopted in accordance with Mexican law. There is no way just to bring a child over the border and adopt him/her in the U.S.

You will find that few U.S. adoption agencies work in Mexico, because the process is often fraught with difficulty. Agencies tend to have a surplus of families wanting to adopt, so they are always looking for programs that would allow them to place children in need of homes. If Mexico's process was less difficult, and less plagued by opportunities for corruption, you could be very sure that the agencies would be working there in droves, especially since most families would love the fact that they wouldn't have to travel halfway around the world.

I don't want to deter you from trying to adopt from Mexico. I have been there, and have seen the poverty that leads some families to place children for adoption, as well as the children who, for want of a family that can support them, live on the streets, making their living through begging and stealing. There are definitely children in need of homes. I simply would urge you to do lots of research before sending funds to any individual or organization that purports to be able to help you to complete an adoption.

Sharon