[caileigh]

my boyfriend is legally blind in one eye although he sees fine out of the other which resulted from being born premature. He is intelligent, has no criminal record and is graduating from college early next year with two bachelor's degrees. I have been told by doctors that because of polycystic ovarian syndrome that my chances of having a baby are slim based on my medical history. We want to get married and have children eventually but a few people have told me that his vision problems are going to restrict us. I can't find any resources about this and I'm scared that we will be limited in adopting a child because of this. He already has a 5 year old daughter that was born before we knew each other although she lives with her mom and stepdad.

Anyone have any advice for us? We're open on race and age although would prefer a younger child since I am 23 and he is 24 and don't feel we would be ready to parent an older child for a long time although we would prefer an infant. We don't mind mild special needs such as ADD or dyslexia but we would like a child that will eventually grow up and be able to take care of themself.

He thinks it is ridiculous that anyone would consider his vision a reason to not let us adopt and I'm just terrified.

[mlbsands]

I would seriously doubt that this would pose a problem overall.. you may find some agencies unwilling, but I cannot imagine you won't be able to find a cild to adopt.. especially given that youa re open to race and other possible issues..

I have know of other people with disabilities adopting so I think you should be fine.. )

Also.... as someone with PCOS as well.. I wish you good luck.. we have never been successful with getting pregnant\, but we are now matched and lookinbg forward to meeting our new little one in about 6 weeks.. )

Mandy

[sunphlowers]

I am not an attorney and cannot give you legal advice.

However, from an academic perspective, both government and private adoption agencies should be covered by the Americans with Disabilities Act.

Categorically rejecting anyone with a disability (including someone who is legally blind) is illegal. The agency can reject an applicant only after looking at their personal situation, including how well their home is adapted, if they conclude that a child would not be safe there. However, they cannot reject a couple outright because they are blind or have any other disability, nor can they automatically infer that the home of a person who is blind would be unsafe.

For more information, see:
http://www.adoptioninstitute.org/policy/ada.html

Again, I am not an attorney, so this is not the advice of a lawyer. I encourage you to contact a lawyer in your state if you have concerns on this issue, and especially if you encounter any difficulties adopting.

[tobeafamily]

As Sunphlowers said, prospective adoptive parents are protected under the Americans With Disabilities Act against discrimination in cases of US domestic adoption. International is different - foreign countries have different requirements.

For domestic US adoption, both of you will need to provide statements (usually a form) from your physicians attesting to the fact that you are both reasonably healthy and have an average chance of survival to a child's age of majority. They will also need to attest that you have no physical or psychological issues that would prevent you from raising a child.

Does this help?

Regina

[crick]

I wouldn't worry about it. I am hearing impaired and have adopted 4 children. The agency asked me some questions regarding it but nothing out of the ordinary.

It's possible some bmoms might not consider you as parents for their child, but it's no different than a bmom not choosing a couple because of different religious beliefs etc.

We adopted via foster care and all our kids were under 5, so there are younger children to adopt, just need to find the right match, just as you would in an infant adoption.

Think positive!
Crick

[newMafamily]

His vision will not be an issue. Let me tell you my mother was legally blind and raised 7 kids as if she had eyes in the back of her head. You have the ADA to stop this kind of discrimination so issues that years ago might have been big aren't any longer. It sounds like you are generally worried that for some reason you won't be able to fufill your dream of a family. Keep asking questions and read some of the threads here it will give you a feel for what the issues are.

It is great that you two are talking about the idea of adoption now. Sometimes people don't have the same views about children and how to build a family. Talking with your boyfriend is the first step to set your mind at ease.

[caileigh]

he dumped me in july. thought i'd add that in as people are still replying and since the loser left me for a young little high school girl any advice given in here is irrelevant.

hurts reading this and realizing how badly he lied to me. nice guy talking one week about getting married and having a family then the next saying he was leaving me for the girl he had cheated on me with 2 years before and supposedly no longer saw.

can't believe I didn't see him for the abusive, immature, childish monster he really is... I spent a long time lying to myself about him.

5 months after things ended with him and I am still hurt so probably will be seeking counselling soon to get over the years of mental abuse that he caused.

thank you for the advice. maybe it will help a blind person more deserving but I pray every day that he will never be another child's father beyond the one he neglects and allows to live with a junkie mother and child molestor grandpa.

someday I will still adopt either alone or with a better man