[djb_97]

Hi everyone -

Last week we got our first call that an expectant mom wanted to meet us and she was due this week!!

We were so excited that someone wanted to meet with us, we had only been in the books less than 7 weeks and hadn't heard a thing, we were really looking forward to the meeting and of course we were nervous too.

Well the meeting was scheduled for Monday morning ( the 12th ), we arrived early so we could speak with our social worker before meeting with the expectant parents and their worker. The meeting time came and went, no show, no call from the expectant parents. At first we thought may be her doctors appointment ran long, then we thought may be she was in labor. The agency tried to track her down and left messages on her cell phone, after waiting over an hour, they sent us home and said they'd call when they knew what was happening.

Around 2pm, we found out she had the baby and according to the birthdad, they decided to try to parent. It's a little hard to accept since she is already parenting 3 and wanted the adoption, but her boyfriend wasn't sure about adoption. We're happy for them as long as she is sure this is what she really wants too.

It's sad that now we won't be as excited about the next meeting we could have, if we ever get another call, and we will be more guarded. Oh well, we'll survive and our baby will find us.

Take care,
Deb

[PetersMom]

I am very sorry about your loss. My dh and I have had similar situations happen 5 times in the last 8 months. Two times I got to hold the babies. We've been trying for 3 years and each time my 4 year old asks if this is going to be his baby brother or sister. My heart cannot break anymore. We are going to China in about a year. I'm tired.

It's too bad that they are not married. I often wonder how a child can feel secure that their parents are committed to them if they cannot be committed to each other first.

[djb_97]

Thanks for your thoughts. I too am sorry for your heart breaking situations, good luck with your journey to China.

Hugs,
Deb

[conman50]

Although I cannot relate to having an adoption fall through at the last minute, I can relate to waiting! We waited over 13 months before we had ANY contact of any sort from any potential birthparents. Then we got "the call" and met our first birthparents and love them! They are both teenagers and have desires to go to college and have careers. We have been matched for almost 2 months and we have used the time to get to know them and build a great rapport with them. Our son is due in July so we counting down the days and using our energy to work on the nursery and things we want done to the house.

I guess what I am saying is that the "right" situation will come along and when it is meant to happen it will. It may be weeks or months away so don't get discouraged

[djb_97]

Thank you so much for the encouragement, I really do appreciate it.

I'm doing ok, still a little sad that it didn't work out, but it's a good thing that we didn't get to meet them and form a bond, it would have been so much harder.

We're trying not to dwell on it and remain positive, our day will come, hopefully sooner than later.

Best of luck with your adoption journey, may the next two months go by quickly and your baby is healthy.

Hugs,
Deb

[enerad]

Oh how hard to have that happen. We are in a matched situation right now, got the call 3 weeks ago... and the baby is due in mid-may. This wait is so-o-o-o-o hard. I worry about just exactly what happened to you. Our situation is similiar. There are other children. I love this idea of open adoption, getting to know the expectant mom, but... the waiting, and worrying seems to get more difficult each day.

Darene

[djb_97]

Hi Darene -

I know how hard it is not to worry, I'm sure everything will turn out just fine.

Does the expectant mom have support from her family and the expectant dad?

I don't think the expectant mom in our situation had any support, except from the agency, her boyfriend wasn't sure about the adoption and I think that had a huge impact on the situation. I just really hope she is doing ok with the decision and the baby is doing well.

Hang in there, it's great that you're keeping busy as an expecting mom yourself, that's what you are! Make sure you take care of any projects you want done before the baby comes.

Best of luck!

Hugs,
Deb