[angelical]

Well, here we go....

We turned in most of our application packet today so our social worker can begin working on our homestudy. And it has already been a small rollercoaster....

Over the weekend, I finally got my husband in front of the computer to look at some of the photolistings. I have been searching them for the past couple months, trying to get an idea of what is out there, but he has not. Well, wouldn't you know it, we found 3 different sets of kids that SEEM like they'd be perfect for us.... and my husband got all excited (so did I).

I was hoping that since the "best" of the three are actually from our county, that our social worker would be able to - - at least - - find out if they were actually still available and at best let their SW know that she might have a family for them....eventually.

As you all may be able to predict... NO SUCH LUCK.

She cannot (or will not) do anything at all until our homestudy is done. (Even though she has told us that SHE was more-or-less matched with her adoptive kids before her homestudy was complete. )

So, I sort of figured on that, but my husband did not. He seemed like he had no sense at all of what a process is involved. So now I'm a little disappointed and he is crushed.

But at least she has confirmed that our HS will be done within 30 days. ... but I wonder how long all the background checks, etc, will take? and is there any chance that those kids will still be available then?? (nope, no way.)

Oh well... here we go!

[lucyjoy]

I never got matched with any of the children I asked about, but all the children who are here are the ones that belong here. Do you have to take classes for your homestudy? We did, but I never found them very helpful. I've heard they've improved. I found it's best not to set your heart on any child's picture. It only makes the process more painful. The children who will become yours may not even be on a list yet.

[faith_amom]

I try to look at the home study as part of my "adoptive labor pains." It hurts, but it's something you have to go through to become a Mom.

Hang in there!!

- Faith

[Cde3girl]

My middle name is "impatient", and boy, was the adoption process really hard for me. I was on a mission last year and though I achieved the ultimate goal, I paid a hefty price in the process. Adoption is an emotional roller coaster so you must excerise as much patience as you can. It's SO HARD I know, but we had a very expeditious process and we are finalizing in a couple of weeks.

Here's what happened:

I checked around local agencies for the homestudy. Went to one "information meeting" and based on the number of annual placements they did for biracial/AA I did not think they would be able to help us quickly. So I found another one at least to do just the homestudy and they were known to do a great job and fast. It still took 2 1/2 months to get through the SW interviews, fingerprinting, physicals, etc. Ok, we started in March and finished early June.

During that time, however, I was making it a full time job doing searches all over the internet at agencies. I wanted to work with a private adoption agency since they place pretty quickly, but tend to be more expensive.

Along that road, I definitely ruled out facilitators!!!!!!

Found 2 agencies that I was willing to send a fee to in order to be considered once our homestudy was finished. I sent a profile and they were looking for us in the meantime!

However, still by July I couldn't seem to find what type of situation we wanted. I remember my husband and I looking out over the valley on July 4th of last year, and said "somewhere out there is our baby, and I wish God would lead us to him soon". The next week we moved into our new house. One week later, a woman emailed me and I don't remember how she found out about me but I was spreading my name and email address EVERYWHERE to agencies, networking businesses, etc.

Anyway, she told me about a situation, and it was the PERFECT one. That next day, we talked to the birthmother, and we were blessed in August with our son and brought him home 24 hours after birth. He's been with us since and has been a blessing.

So, the entire process including the post-placements, and the final report, all in all took 11 months to finalization.

Yes, I was on a mission!!! But though the ink was barely dry on the homestudy when we were matched, it still took too long.

I know, I have no patience, and yes, that's why it was so hard for me but worth every sleepless night.

I guess that's our "labor" until delivery!