[Noi]

I'm really frightened of home study. I've read all of the info about what should happen, but I'm just really frightened. Mainly I'm scared because a few years ago I was extremely depressed and I hospitalized myself for five days because I was afraid for my own well-being. I'm on medications now, and stablized, and not depressed, and haven't been (clinically) in a long time, but is the home study person going to understand this or just label me as 'former mental patient' and therefore unsuitable to be a parent? Does anyone have experience with prior mental health issues and home study/adoption?

Best of luck, and please wish me luck as well,

Noi

[FamilyBound]

Noi, the fact that you took your own initiative to get help is a huge positive step and I'm sure your social worker will recognize that. You may have to get a letter from your doctor saying that you are in a good mental state to adopt a child now, but that really depends on the requirements of your state.

Don't give up hope!

[Noi]

FamilyBound,

Thank you so much for your words. I'm still really frightened--it's like a nightmare scenario--you know, that everything will be going well until I tell them about a past history of major depression, and then all doors will be barred to me. As for getting a letter from a physician, hopefully the doctors as well will not label me 'former mental patient who's still on meds' and give me up for lost. *I* know how to view depression; *I* know that it's an illness like any other; *I* know that maintaining myself on antidepressants is just like a diabetic maintining him or herself on insulin--I just hope that the social worker will know that, too, and that if he or she doesn't, that I can make him or her understand.

Thank you again for your response.

Wishing you all the best,

Noi

[FamilyBound]

Social Workers are there to help prepare you to become parents. I have heard of very few cases where prospective adoptive parents were 'turned down' to become parents, and the two cases I can think of offhand were because of recent felony convinctions and arrests, not related to medical conditions!

Have you talked to your physician about your desire to adopt? One you talk to him/her about it, you'll know what they would recommend and that should put your mind at ease, a bit.

[leannh]

i'm with familybound. the SW is there to Help you become a parent. they are not there to trick you are get you to show them how you cant be a parent. i was REAlly worried about our HS when it came to my DH telling our worker about his drug use in the past. it was before he met me, and it was Pretty severe. i just Knew that there was no way a SW would say he could be a parent. BUT what he did was talk to DH for A LONG time, so he could get an understanding of where he was(mentally and physically) when he was doing the drugs and where he is now.
our state requires a physical and there is a comment section for the physician and it asks if there is any reason the DR thinks we could not be adoptive parents, our just wrote No. and that was that.
Dr.'s and SW are trained in just these areas and they Are on your side in this. i Honestly think that once this HS is over, you will laugh at how scared you were.
please let us know how you are doing and how is all goes.
hang in there
leannh

[MomTo1]

Noi....

I think the answer will lie in weather or not you need your medicine to live normally again. Will you always be required to be on these meds? Was your depression a result of a tragic event (such as death, infertility, accident) or was it a result of a mental imbalance in the family, with a family history.

I know of one woman who is biopolar who tried to adopt. She could not. That is a huge difference then someone voluntary checking themselves into a facility for some help.

[Supersport]

My DH and I have just been turned down as parents to a waiting child. I am an incest survivor. As a teenager after I disclosed DSS became involved in my life and I received the help I needed. Our homestudy has been a long process, we have not been "approved" yet, but are told it is a matter of formality at this point. Our SW does not see any problems in our approval because of the way I have dealt with my own issues. I was required to get medical and psychological documentation about my stability and ability to parent. My social worker did ask me on more than a dozen occaisions wether or not I take medication. The answer for me was no, I haven't taken medication since I was a teenager.

It has not been an easy week for us, but we were prepared. I guess what I am trying to say is if you get approved by your agency or social worker you may face other social workers who will question you as a parent resulting in you not being chosen for a child they are representing.

Best of luck to you, I wish I could be more positive about the situation, but I wanted you to know the reality that I am currently facing.