[ImtheMomtwo]

I am curious to see if anyone has used one of the stepparent adoption "kits" I've seen listed for $300. My husband and I got custody of his two preschoolers 2 months prior to our marriage a little over 2 years ago. The biological Mom doesn't want to be financially responsible and is willing to sign off on them so I can adopt them. I would like to get the adoption done but in contacting a lawyer was told I was looking at $2000 in fees plus court costs. Any feedback from someone who has used these would be greatly appreciated.

Thanks!!!!

[markmm]

My wife and I are in the midst of my adopting her two daughters in Broome County Family Court here in NY and we don't have a lawyer and did not purchase a kit. We got a pre-packaged set of forms right from the office at the county courthouse. Maybe that's unique to our county, but you should check to see. Or there's a website where you can download the forms: http://www.nycourts.gov/forms/family...adoption.shtml

We filled them out ourselves to the best of our ability and turned them in. We just met with the judges aide this Monday (not sure if she was an attorney, or paralegal or what). She told us that we filled the forms out better than most lawyers do. There are a couple of forms to be fixed and a couple other documents she told us we needed.

We haven't shelled out a penny to make this happen, not for lawyers, forms or anything. You can do it yourself. If you do something wrong the courts will let you know and tell you how to fix it.

We have had tremendous support from our county court employees and public servants. They're so used to dealing with divorces and custody battles that they welcome the opportunity to do something good like an adoption.

Best of luck.

Mark

[ImtheMomtwo]

Thanks for the reply. I am in Steuben County but have decided to hire a lawyer due to the Biological mom signing an Extra Judicial Consent form that was revokable for 45 days - didn't want there to be any question about the legitimacy of the document. Today I went to get fingerprinted and start the investigation.

[markmm]

We had the same thing with the Extra Judicial Consent form. We actually just waited the 45 days from when the biological father signed it and had it notarized before we even filed the petition to be sure he wouldn't change his mind.

Even with that the judge's assistant we met with this week told us that the judge may prefer a judicial consent form. For us this doesn't represent much of a problem 'cause the bio father thinks it's better for the girls that I adopt them too. I just hope that if he has to come to court it doesn't have to be something the kids have to witness. They've been hurt enough by this and to have to see him again and watch him sign the paperwork saying that he's giving them up would just bring all that back.

Well, good luck to you with your adoption. I hope it goes well for you and doesn't take too long. I think in the smaller counties like ours it can go a lot faster. The folks at the courthouse seem to think we might have the final hearing before the holidays. But we haven't done the home study yet, so that might be a little bit of wishful thinking unless the home study can be done quickly and easily. Which, maybe for a step-parent adoption it can 'cause it's not as involved. We'll see...

Best regards,

Mark