[Rydersierra]

Hi All-
My Dh and I expressed an interest in adopting, from Oklahoma DHS, to the adoption specialist in our area. Since then, she's been calling back to 'check in' every 2 weeks, and sending paperwork and applications in the mail to us-I'm sure that's protocol(sp?).

We have 2 bio kids-the youngest is 3. I had asked about adopting a child younger than 3, and she acted like it would be no problem, even sounded excited when I told her I was a stay-at-home mom, and what
my husband's occupation is.

BUT-after taking down our preferences, she continued to ask if we would accept sibling groups(we don't have the bedrooms!), teenage pregnant girls, etc, etc-until it turned into somewhat of a sob story.

My question is--was this adoption specialist just trying to get Dh and I in the door in order to guilt us into adopting a child we are not comfortable with? If so, is this a normal/acceptable practice for DHS? How truly impossible is it to adopt a young child with only minor emotional/physical disabilities? She also really discouraged us from doing the foster-to-adopt route-is that the norm?

TIA!

[sunflower1220]

DH and I are going through OKDHS for adoption as well. We have not had any problems with our caseworker other than one minor incident. However we are hoping for a sibling group so that may be the difference. I was told that they will show and ask you about many other types and if it's not what you want to keep your foot down about it. What part of OK do you live in? I think part of the reason we haven't had too many problems is because we used a non-profit organization that supports foster/adoptive parents. If you want any more info feel free to P.M. me, I'll help where I can.

[msmoo2]

We've been in contact with our local DHS agency for over 1 year. I make monthly trips down to the office to look through the children on their monthly list that are available for adoption placement. Several times I have indicated that we are interested in a child or children that are listed there. I have never heard back on any of the inquiries that we have made. If I call to ask the SW about the children she will say that the child's worker won't call her back or that no one will return her email about the child. This summer we adopted a baby girl through a private domestic adoption after waiting for almost a year for DHS to place a child with us. We are still interested in either fostering or foster-adopting a child throught the foster care system. It seems that no one is very interested in actually placing them in an adoptive home. It's SO frustrating!

[msmoo2]

Oh... what part of OK are you in? I'm in the NE corner.

[dscarter]

Can you choose a different state. Contact that State that you are interested in and then send them your home study.. Then send you sw the home study.. Also, if you contact Adoptuskids, they will help you NOT get lost in the system. If you are an approved home, you should be having no problems.. I dont understand what is going on in your case. Here (Ar) we have a place called one church on source, They also help keep me posted and make sure things are going our way.. Try that.. adoptuskids call on us once a month to make sure that the sw is working for us, if not they contact who they need to too make sure things keep rolling..

[msmoo2]

Yes, we are approved for both foster care and adoption placements. In addition, we are even Native American, which when we started we were told they desperately need Native American homes. I'm not sure if it's just the county that I'm in or if it's an statewide (Oklahoma) issue.

[hensonden]

We have finished our homestudy in October and we have gone down to look at the books also, It seems as if it is taking forever! They say it can take a month or up to two years.... the luck of the draw they say. It is getting so frustrating!

[zjmower1]

I'm in Oregon and adopted from DHS and from what I found here, the main concern from DHS is that they have so many children who need homes and teenagers, siblings, etc are sometimes harder to place than other children. Educate yourself on different adoptive situations and decide what/who you'd be comfortable with in regards to adoption. Be open minded but if there are special needs or other situations that you feel you could not facilitate for whatever reason then make that clear and do something that may not be the best choice for your family or the child(ren).