[TigR8]

We've been working with a reputable agency and things have been going okay. Unfortunately, we don't feel there's a good connection between us and our counselor. We feel the counselor is too business-like and lacking in emotion. The process is hard enough without having to struggle to get along with your counselor.

Our choices are to suck it up and find a way to salvage the relationship with the counselor or change agencies. Neither choice is making us very happy, but one must be made. The obvious request for a new counselor has already been made and the agency does not make this easy.

Anyone's 2¢ would be appreciated. Thanks.

[Crane13]

I'm in Illinois too. Actually, our first case worker tried to talk us out of foster care. We complained to the higher-ups and got a new case worker who wasn't so burned out. Anyway, we have had five little ones pretty quickly, so I guess we are okay at foster care anyway.

Can you call a higher up and tell them that you did not feel a connection with the worker? I am sure they have nmore workers at that level. Our wonderful worker left and now we are stuck with the crabby supervisor who only worries about money... Not the best representation of us, but we are choosing to stick with them until we move out of state in June.

Good luck. I can't remember if you are allowed to share your agency with me... Maybe you can PM it to me.

Jill

[Linny]

I'm in Illinois too.....and frankly, there are crummy agencies, just like there are good ones too. Maybe you've got a crummy one (there are plenty.....).
If it isn't going to cost a lot of money, then I'd change. If you're in the process of having a homestudy done.....having some ding-bat write a homestudy based on 'her/his' experiences and not yours, can sometimes be a tough thing to overcome........(and if this were the case, you'd end up changing agencies anyway....)

We've adopted many times.....and three of the seven have been through the foster/adopt system (which we would not do again)..............however, it's a business......and with that definition, comes the fact that there are 'good and bad'. Do yourself a favor..........find a better agency.

Most sincerely,

Linny

[icunurse]

The agency we worked with told us a few times that we need to work with someone who understands us. We were lucky, though, and felt we had a good relationship with our SW. Sometimes the SW's are overworked. Sometimes they keep a professional emotional distance that, at the time, seems just plain distant and uncaring. And somtimes personalities just don't click. Before I would attempt to switch agencies, I would check to see what adjustments would need to be done to switch (ie. more classes? more fees? will the homestudy carry over? etc.) If you are happy overall with the practices of the agency, I would really try to just keep pursuing a new counselor. I understand that maybe they might want you to stay with your current counselor (especially if he/she has seen you through the whole process and "knows" you), but it is your investment of time and emotion and you should have the right to switch counselors. Let us know how it goes. Good luck.