[Katies_mom]

After being with Sara a week and one day, her birthmom changed her mind. I am crushed and my heart is broken in a million pieces......

[iss36]

Katies_mom.
I am so sorry. I know your heart is breaking into a million peices. I have been there with a failed adoption. But your situation is different. If you need to talk please email me or instant message me . (yahoo is italiansweetsoul )and (aol is bayshoremama74)
My heart is breaking for you I will pray for you and your family. I want you to know it is ok to feel anger, resentment and hurt and sad it is completely normal. I know I felt like that little boy that was suppose to be ours. She made us feel like he was our but in the end we didn't get him. I was so crushed and hurt by her. I mourned him so much I still think about him.
you are in my thoughts and prayers
kimemail

[dl]

As an adoptee and simply as another human being I wanted to offer my prayers and sympathy. I am so sorry that you experienced this heartbreak.

It would be easy to understand a lack of faith after what you have experienced. I don't know how you can get past that, but I believe that there is a child that needs a loving home that will find its way to your home and heart.

Take care and the best of luck! Good thoughts and prayers are with you. Warmest regards!

[shirleyville]

I am in Indiana....and I just wanted to hug you extra tight!
You are in my prayers!
(((EXTRA TIGHT HUGS)))
Sally

[sspete]

What a heart breaking loss for you--My blessings and Prayers are with you!! This is a very sad situation, and there are no words to express how sorry I am for you and your family. I just wanted to send ((((((BIG HUGS))))) to you because you deserve them! Please know my thoughts and sympathy are with you! S Pete

[double r]

I understand your pain. We had a failed adoption ((((HuGS)))) and prayers.

[laucks]

I am so sorry for the loss you have experienced. As Kim said, it is normal to feel sad, angry, mad, depressed and much more. You are entitled to those feelings. That said, I do believe that you will find the child you are meant to be with. Hugs. I am also in northern indiana. If you would like to email me, feel free. I am an adoptive mom with 2 children.

Melissa

Melissa_and_madalyn@yahoo.com

[niece]

Dear Katie;
I can understand your pain. The little boy that I was supposed to adopt was one year old yesterday. I was present at his birth and his bom gave him to someone else. I trusted her she was 'friend" or so I thought, so there was no contract at the time. She let a different couple adopt bc they could pay all of her "expences".
I hope that you know that you are in our prayers.

[Mommy2amiracle]

Dear Janice:

I'm so sorry to hear about the failed adoption. Did the birthmom sign consents at the time of placement? In Indiana, I thought that consent was irrevocable once signed? You are in my thoughts and prayers!

Mommy2amiracle

[Katies_mom]

Our birthmom /my cousin signed consent to guardianship before Sara was born. But we hadn't had our court hearing yet because the baby wasn't due until July 3rd. I talked with our attorney for a long time before we took Sara back, and she said it was just postponing the inevitable in fighting it.

This has been a hard hard month.........

[MissKarenR]

Dear Katie's Mom,
So sorry to hear about your loss. Your post caught my attention because I am traveling to Indiana from New York to adopt this week. The birthmom has had the girl for 14 months but doesn't want the responsibility anymore. I talked to her again tonight and she seems sure of her decision. However, there's always that chance she'll change her mind. I'm so scared especially since I will lose lots of money if she revokes. Not to mention the risk of a broken heart. Just curious why you didn't try to fight for her in court. Indiana has a 30 days to revoke but she'd have to go to court first right? In my case, I'd probably lose because the Mom had her for 14 months before placement. Wondering if you could let me know anything about the system there. Feel free to email me
KBlumer1@twcny.rr.com

[dl]

Just a suggestion - there are many that take offense to the abbreviation of "birthmom" for birthmother. If you think about it you'll realize that it is an abbreviation for a bodily function. If you don't want to type the complete word birthmother, "bmother" or "bmom" or "bio-mom" is frequently used and much more pleasant to everyone."

I was adopted at 13 months and have no memory of life prior to being with my parents. How sad a mother would decide she just doesn't want the responsibility anymore. Of course, it's better she acknowledges her limitations instead of ignoring them and neglecting the girl.

Hope all works out and this little girl ends up safe in your arms!

[Sharon]

DLouis, thank you for pointing that out. I completely agree that birthmom has an unpleasant ring to it. Birthmom or B-mom sounds so much more respectful and caring.
Karen, I wish you the best of luck with your adoption. I hope everything works out well for you.
Sincerely, Sharon

[bajohnson]

I am just astounded at how much adopting parents go through to parent their children. I have recently drifted over into your "area" of the forum, and am dumbfounded at how much heartache and pain you go through. I can't imagine having a baby placed in my arms, taking him home with me, and then having someone say, oh I changed my mind. I can't even imagine making it through the home studies, scrutiny etc. I'd never pass. My house is a mess, sometimes I swear, and I've been known to yell at my kids a bit! I just want you to know that you all have my support and sympathy. If anyone doubts your sincerity in wanting to be parents after all you go through, they are nuts.
My deepest sympathy on your loss. There are no easy answers here, just keep on hoping and I wish there was something I could do to make it better.
Hugs,
Beth