[jsjs]

My husband and I currently have no children and we are working with an adoption agency. We are leaning towards adopting a toddler or slightly older child from Costa Rica. We are also seriously considering the idea of adopting more than one child at a time--that is, a sibling group. **However, the likelihood of being referred a sibling group of three or more children is much greater than a sibling group of only two.** We have some concerns about taking on an adoptive family of that size all at once. I would greatly appreciate any and all feedback from those with experience either adopting from Costa Rica, adopting 'older children', and/or adopting sibling-groups! Thanks!!

[floridacpl]

hi JSJS We are considering Costa Rica also. If you or anybody find any information on this program please PM me

[floridacpl]

I am not sure where you got your information kentuky or how have you been waiting for 4 years to adopt from costa rica when the program opened just last year after it closed back in 2003. Let me be clear costa rica stopped all international adoptionr in 2003 and it just reopened in 2008-2009 time frame. According to most agencies adopting from there is fairly quicker than the 3 or 4 years from Colombia however the law says kids have to be 5+ to be elegible for international adoption

I am looking to adopt from costa rica and I have 2 agencies that I am interested in but havent made the jump yet.

[tulip100]

I tried to PM both of you but it didn't go through. I guess I did something wrong. We are also adopting from Costa Rica. PM me!

[jsjs]

Hello to the others, and thank you for responding. Congrats to all of you whereever you are in your adoption journey and best wishes!
My husband and I live in Connecticut and are working with a local agency. We've narrrowed our program choices down to either Costa Rica or the Philippines. The agency says Costa Rica reopened in the Fall of 2009.(I believe that's when their program reopened.)
We are open to a child toddler-age through school-age (up to 6 or 7 y.o.). And we are open to adopting siblings. But I guess I still need convincing that we can 'handle' THREE siblings--all at once!--especially adopted children, each of whom may come with issues common in adopted kids. :-)

[tulip100]

It sounds like we may have the same agency. They have a list of clients you can contact who've adopted older kids and sibling groups. Talking to them might help you decide about siblings.

Remember though that your homestudy and immigration approval will say the number of children you can adopt, so if you say 2 children then you will not be able to adopt 3 without updating your paperwork. In other words, you won't get a referral for 3 kids unless your paperwork says that you are approved for 3 kids. Of course, you may have a longer wait from CR for 2 siblings than for 3 siblings. But then again, the CR program is so new that the agencies are just going by what CR has told them, not based on what has happened with other clients. I don't think that any children have been adopted yet since the program re-opened.

Good luck!

[jsjs]

tulip100, thanks. yes, we do realize that about the homestudy and immigration approval. so, my husband and i really have to make a decision about 'how many". we don't want to say ok to 3 siblings, just to speed things up!
our agency has provided us the contact info for some reference families, and we have spoken to some who have adopted sibling groups. but still, my hubby seems more ok with the idea of a 3-sibling-group than i am. i can't help that i'm afraid!--we've never parented before..and it would be 3 all at once!

[tulip100]

Good luck in making a decision. Listen to your gut instinct and your heart and you will make the right decision, whatever it may be.

[sak9645]

I think that you are very wise to think twice about adopting a sibling group of three, when you have never parented.

While parenting three children is a challenge for anyone, you should also consider that you are not dealing with three children born to you over a period of years. They are three children who will probably have some "baggage" from life in their birth family and/or in an orphanage or foster care -- issues of ability to attach, issues of "survival" behaviors that work well in an orphanage, but not in a family, issues of grief and loss, etc. There may even be abuse issues.

In addition, they are three children who may have such a strong bond with each other, having had to protect each other for some time, that they will sometimes "gang up" on you or, at least, go to each other for help and reassurance, instead of trusting you to assist them. While most internationally adopted children learn English quickly in the U.S., a sibling group may have greater difficulty, because their natural tendency will be to talk to each other in their native language.

All in all, I would recommend that you do a lot of reading about parenting older adopted children, and try to meet other families who have adopted sibling groups internationally (not necessarily from C.R.).

If you conclude, at that point, that you feel capable of parenting three siblings, by all means, go for it. Older children, and sibling groups, are among the hardest to place, and many languish in orphanages and foster homes for years because no one wants to adopt them. But don't rush to adopt three siblings just to make the adoption process faster. The children will be yours for a lifetime, and you want to be sure that you can help them achieve their fullest potential without sacrificing your sanity, your marriage, etc.

Sharon

[maggie_va]

I would be careful of any agency that says anything such as "quick", "fast", etc and then uses the word "anticipated" especially when dealing with a Latin American country.

Most pilot programs never quite conform to the timelines agencies think they will.

I would love to see that adoptions progress in some country in Latin America as I am hoping to adopt again but so far I have found very few. It seems like El Salvador is the one country where some adoptions have completed in the 2009 - 2010 time frame.

There is one agency that has a couple pilot programs - 2 in Spanish speaking countries and on another continent - that does monthly updates on their programs. It's a good agency and well regarded and it can give you an idea of how timelines and setbacks develop for pilot programs. If you want the name, you can PM me.

good luck.