[SAVeronika]

First for the vent. We have finally, finally after two long years made a final decision to start an adoption so for the past week I've contacted social workers about a homestudy. Out of 3 I've contacted to ask if they will be available to do a homestudy, not one has returned my emails. Are you kidding me?? We haven't been turned down, they have no personal info about us, just a question. Can you do an international homestudy for us? And no answers. What am I supposed to do now? Would you wait for them to answer or contact someone else?

Then, a question. This will be our first adoption, our other 3 are biological kids. We can apply for two kids at once if we want to, but run the risk of not being allowed to adopt any if they turn us down for two. Will anyone here risk that or will you just apply to adopt one child and try for another adoption later on?

[ksquilter72]

Since much of the frustration in adoption is the waiting, I wouldn't wait more than 3-4 days for a return email before striking these social workers from the list. You want someone responsive!

As for the second question, I'd discuss it with your social worker. If she/he thinks you could be approved for 2, I'd go for it. Our adoption agency had us request I600A approval for two children 'just in case' anyway.

[Max'smom]

Hi,
There are many reasons why they may not have replied. However, you might want to wait to do the home study until you have chosen a country and an agency, as the HS requirements vary and also, some agencies have in-house people do the home study.

[SAVeronika]

Thanks for the understanding! I'm thinking that I don't want to work with anyone who makes me wait for a response right at the beginning.

Max's mom, we have decided on a country and we're doing an independent adoption.

ksquilter72, I don't think that our social worker will have problems with approving us for two, but the country itsself might have a problem since we are already over the max number of kids already in the home.

[sak9645]

First off, your best bet is to contact licensed, nonprofit adoption agencies in your state that do international adoptions. Those agencies are the most likely to have homestudy social workers on staff or under contract who are familiar with the requirements for a homestudy for international adoption. Also, some countries may require you to use a social worker affiliated with an agency, rather than one in private practice.

I would also suggest that you NOT choose a homestudy agency or worker until you have selected a country and a placement agency. Some very reputable placement agencies require or prefer you to work with a social worker from your state whom they recommend. The reason is that these agencies tend to want a very high quality homestudy, and have identified social workers around the country whose homestudies meet their standards.

By all means, talk to other families in your state who have adopted from your country of interest in the recent past. They can often tell you about social workers who do a great job -- and those who do not. Ask them specific questions; here are just a few.

1. Did the social worker seem very familiar with the requirements of your country of interest?

2. How quickly was the social worker able to schedule your first meeting?

3. Was the social worker able to accommodate your time constraints, such as a need to schedule meetings in the evenings or on weekends, because of problems with taking time off from work?

4. Did the social worker give you a clear list of the documents you need to provide at the first meeting?

5. Did the social worker act as if he/she was eager to make your adoption happen and to help you become the best parents you can be? Or did he/she act as if he/she was trying to find reasons to disqualify you?

6. Did the social worker answer all of YOUR questions about things like the adoption process, the medical risks in adoption, how to teach your child to appreciate her birth heritage, etc.? Or did he/she act as if he/she was the only one entitled to ask the questions?

7. Once the social worker finished all of the document collection, counseling sessions, and home visits required, how long did it take him/her to write up the homestudy report?

8. If allowed by your state and agency, did you get to review the homestudy for inaccuracies? If so, did the social worker get the facts straight, the names spelled right, and so on? A sloppily written homestudy can delay adoptions enormously, as foreign governments question inconsistent spellings, dates that don't make sense, and so on.

9. What did the homestudy worker charge?

Sharon