[photomommaof2]

wondering if you are allowed to specify girl or boy. i thought i read they do that but then an agency here in canada i called and they said you cannot specify and they have only ever placed boys.

thanks. just curious. still exploring which countries are best for our situation.

[sak9645]

Many U.S. agencies are moving towards not letting first-time parents specify gender, because Americans overwhelmingly prefer to adopt girls. This preference means that too many boys remain in orphanages and foster homes around the world. And when you have a country, like Thailand, where more boys than girls are in need of homes in the first place, the problem is compounded.

Usually, agencies that do not let first-time parents specify gender DO allow parents with other children (bio or adopted) to make a gender request. They know that some people feel that their family isn't complete until they have at least one child of each gender. They also know that, in some families, children must share bedrooms, and therefore must be of the same gender.

I just looked on the websites of two U.S. agencies that place children from Thailand; there aren't too many agencies in the U.S. that do. One is silent on the issue, and one says that it does not allow gender selection for first-time parents. My guess is that, if you are allowed to specify gender, and decide to specify a girl, you would have a very long wait ahead of you. Depending on the Thai welfare agency with which an American agency is affiliated, the wait can be quite long even if you want to adopt a boy.

Also, be aware that the U.S. State Department website says that healthy children -- of either gender -- from Thailand are very rarely placed with foreign families. My assumption is that these children wind up being placed with Thai families.

I hope this helps.

Sharon