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Originally Posted By Looking

Browsing the Parent Profiles, I see that there are 102 looking to love a white child, and only 2! willing to love a black one.
This is sooo sad. What difference does it make how near or far to the equator a human evolved.
I thought we are all God's children?

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Originally Posted By Connie

I so agree with you! I myself am a WHITE female who has a WHITE husband. I feel that a child is a child. However, on our journey through this process we have experienced heartache. Neither of our families accept the fact that we want to adopt a Bi-Racial child. I am having such a hard time with this. Do you have any advise? I realize it is OUR life but it is so nice to have FAMILY support. Please feel free to e-mail me a Crazyconnie@excite.com

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Originally Posted By Treva

Color shouldn't matter. They all have to be taken care of.

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Originally Posted By Ellen

Is the perfect example of how deep seeds of racism are this country. DISGUSTING!!! I must update your numbers 112 Cauc. to 1 AA hopeful adoptive parents. If I was a Birth mom I would only go for the parents willing to adopt a child of ANY race. As for dealing with untolerant family. I am sorry to hear that. In my case the 1-2 ignorants came around quickly once the fear of the unknown had a face, name and smile. If they don't open their hearts go to a senior center and adopt some new parents & grandparents.
I would like to hear from all the hopefuls not willing to cross certain race lines? Why will you adopt say a Asian or AA/Cauc child and not a AA one?

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Originally Posted By my reasons

We are one of those people. My husband discuss this issue daily if we adopt out of our race (white) I want to adopt completely out of our race, he wants to go bi-racial becuase he thinks they are beautiful(and they are!).

As far bi-racial - it would leave my husband with the perception of being "only" a stepfather - I have heard many stories of people asking adopted bi-racial - children no, who is your real dad. If we adopt I want it to be obvious that the child is equally ours wether that means they look similar to us or completely different.

We have given this a lot of thought and you don't have to like our reasons, but they are ours to make for our family.

Just out of curiosity how many bi-racial, AA or special needs have YOU adopted? I know alot of people have adopted many, but they are mostly understanding of others decisions - the people who judge tend to have not researched the ramifications of their statements on the families and CHILDREN - all the love in the world at home will not make others more tolerant or kind. It does add an additional dimension of being "different" which if you talk to adopted children most of them already do feel.

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Originally Posted By Ellen

I have adopted 2 children. Our Cauc/AA is about 2 shades darker than our AA child. Both were considered 'special needs'. Yes, I understand people have their reasons. That FACT is 1 vs 112 in the parent profiles. Judging? no. Reality? yes. I also did much research and transracially adopted children, statistically do just fine.
Why could not YOU be the "stepparent" and the bmom be black. I do not get it. My husband is has a tan color, is also adopted and unsure of his racial makeup. Many think they are his kids. SO I guess if I were worried of the opinions of strangers, I would be the step parent.
My friend went to romania and adopted, and although he has straight hair, his hue is the same as my AA kids. Not what she expected, but would not change a thing, they recently adopt an America AA child as well.
Good luck in what ever you decide.

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Originally Posted By To Ellen

Thanks for your reply - both of us are very fair, and MOST of the time children stay with their mother.

We have good friends of the family who adopted a caucausion daughter and a bi-racial daughter (they are both grown now). Life was wonderful until daughter #2 (who we always believed to be colorblind) became a an older teenager - she had a lot of problems which she placed blame on being adopted into an all white family - while raising "other than our race" children is much different know - looking at the problems she had and still has, has also made me a bit more leary.

Anyway - we are in the process of an adoption now, so we will have time to re-evaluate our position for next time. Life is nothing if you refuse to keep learning, growing and changing!!

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Originally Posted By Ellen

I know of children who blame their biological parents for all sorts of reason and for all kinds of problems. The fact they were too fat & had to wear glasses, their parents got divorced, Dad was a drunk so, Mom was never home ... etc, etc.... Life is not really easy for anyone, and I know their is going to be some unique challenges for my kids. We are all different from one another and that is what makes each person special. I do hope it is growing pains your friends daughter is going through and she makes it through okay.
I also think it is different now, kids are more tolerant then my 30 something yr old generation and imagine the next one to be even more so. Most kids today are becoming kind of a homogenous 'American' regardless of color, yet effected by its economic legacy.
I guess you just never know what life may bring, All we can do is try our best.

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Originally Posted By Article

This is an interesting article

http://www.babycenter.com/tips/5029_200109.html

Just as interesting is the posted responses

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Originally Posted By MaryAlyce

I find the term "colorblind" saddening. It usually implies we ignore all other cultures except white/eurocentric. Please don't misunderstand me, I believe a child is a child and deserves a loving home, regardless the the ethnicities or races involved. But, I also believe it is critical to NOT be blind to the fact that we each have our own cultural heritage that shouldn't be ignored or denied. If any of us adopt outside our race/ethnicity/culture, we should do our best to help our children learn about their birth heritage, as well as their adopted family's heritage.

In my opinion, daughter #2 has every right to be upset if her heritage is being denied by her family. She's not white and shouldn't be expected to pretend she is. Just as I'm not black or asian or multiracial and could never be, even if I was completed submerged in one of those cultures.

Please, let's help our children to be proud of who they are...of ALL parts of their culture, heritage and communities, by adoption and by birth. They have every right to be proud!

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Originally Posted By Lexi

Our profile says we are waiting and willing to adopt multi-racial and we have not been matched yet!!! What's that all about? We have been waiting for 9 months and still nothing!!!