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  #1  
Old 06-26-2012, 01:07 PM
Tenseintexas Tenseintexas is offline
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Turned Down by agency??

My husband and. We're devastated to just receive a letter saying the Gladney Agency had turned down our application for adopting with them. I ne'er even considered that happening. I don't get it. We are a very stable loving family with a 2 year old?? Why did we get turned down? I am devastated.
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  #2  
Old 06-26-2012, 01:28 PM
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mdpaul159 mdpaul159 is offline
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(((HUGS))) sweetie

Try not to get too down on yourself. We were turned down by an adoption facilitator due I think to the situations we would like to be placed with and by an attorney who felt similiar. Sometimes its the type of situations that they are presented to. Just pick yourself up and try again. There's plenty out there!
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Married 9 yrs, TTC for 7 yrs, 6 m/c's
www.ourlifethroughadoption.wordpress.com
2/21/12 Started moving forward with adoption
3/09/12 First Appt with Atty
3/15/12 Completed Parenting Classes
4/24/12 Submitted Home Study App
5/25/12 1st Meeting w/SW for Home Study
7/06/12 Matched and due 10/06/12
8/06/12 2nd Meeting w/SW for Home Study
8/13/12 Home Study finalized
9/14/12 Baby C born
10/23/12 Final Home Study
12/21/12 Finalized Adoption
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  #3  
Old 06-26-2012, 01:47 PM
Zenbaby Zenbaby is offline
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(((hugs))) I agree that it probably has something to do with the situation you are looking for if it is a domestic adoption. If it is international, the program may be closed or you do not fit into that countries requirements. I would try calling so you can get an answer and know if there is something you need to reexamine about your adoption pla. I am sure it is something simple on their part and nothing really to do with you. There are a ton of agencies so just move on to anoher one. Good luck!
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  #4  
Old 06-26-2012, 05:43 PM
TwinkleKS TwinkleKS is offline
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Sending you a PM
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  #5  
Old 06-26-2012, 06:50 PM
sak9645 sak9645 is offline
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Rather than stewing about the issue, why not call the agency and ask? They should give you a reason.

Sharon
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born 10/18/95
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  #6  
Old 06-26-2012, 08:51 PM
Ms.G Ms.G is offline
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Gladney is veeerrryyy picky! They turn down over 75% of the people who apply. Call them and ask them why you were turned down. It may help you with the next one.
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  #7  
Old 06-26-2012, 08:55 PM
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LauraLiz LauraLiz is offline
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They may be very picky to make their numbers look better- only entering certain families and ones that match the situations they are looking for. I don't know for sure.
But I do think that you need to ask yourself if it will stay with you. If it will bother you, then you need to find out the answer about why so you can continue on this journey and be free of that weight.

Hang in there.... this too is just a bump in the road.
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Just when you think you know love, something little comes along to remind you just how BIG love is.

June 2006- Started adoption process
April 2007- DS was born- Never knew so much love
December 2007- DS adoption finalized


April 2009- Started adoption process again
Two failed placements and a lot of ups and downs in our second adoption journey.

Out of difficulties, grow miracles... (Jean De Le Bruyere)

January 2012- DS was born- A completely wonderful surprise!
July 2012- DS adoption is finalized

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  #8  
Old 06-26-2012, 10:08 PM
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Linny Linny is offline
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Agencies and/or attorneys can refuse to include you in their pool for just about any reason. One refusal we heard was because we'd adopted a couple of times already. Another was because we weren't infertile.

I'd definately want to know *why* they refused you; but realize this isn't the end of the world. There are good and bad agencies and as others have said, there are a LOT of agencies in this nation. I would be especially curious though, as to why you didn't realize you'd be turned down from the beginning...rather than having to wait for a letter from an agency?

Evenso, pick yourself and go on to the next agency and/or attorney. Much of the adoption journey has to do with perseverance. It will serve you well in times like these.

Good luck.

Sincerely,

Linny
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  #9  
Old 06-27-2012, 04:50 AM
Tenseintexas Tenseintexas is offline
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Thank you all...I feel better today. Still very down because this agency was the one i really felt a connection with...none of the others, so I feel i have to start a whole new list of ones I like.
As far as asking why-- They will not tell me why. I have asked several times with the " adoption intake coordinator" and she is not even given the information. She said their is a board of members who make the decision...I dont think I can find out the WHY part. What she DID say was that it def could of been because we already have a child and the wait is so much longer for those couples. She said they dont take more than they know they can match in a timely manner.
Whatever.
If yall now of any great adoption agencies in texas-- let me know
Thank you all
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  #10  
Old 06-27-2012, 06:50 AM
misstippy misstippy is offline
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I sent you a pm with info on the agency in Texas we used.
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  #11  
Old 06-27-2012, 07:20 AM
WaitingTX WaitingTX is offline
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I could not respond to your last message because your mailbox is full - please just let me know when you have room and I will send info. :-)
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  #12  
Old 06-27-2012, 09:17 AM
BestMomEver BestMomEver is offline
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My guess is it is totally not personal and just a numbers thing. I know it feels huge to you but they probably did you a favor. A lot of agencies will only work with 20 people or so at a time. Once their list gets so big that they have more than double to waiting list to get into the 20, they do turn people down unless the paps are looking for traditionally hard to place babies and have big budgets. My guess is that it is totally not personal but they probably could have told you from the first phone call.
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  #13  
Old 06-27-2012, 09:30 AM
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DrAmanda DrAmanda is offline
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We were not accepted by a couple agencies because we already had a biological child and were not infertile.
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We are blessed with two amazing children (one biological dd and one adopted ds).

We waited only 55 days before we were matched with our son.
He was born and in our arms just 2.5 weeks later.
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  #14  
Old 06-27-2012, 09:38 AM
oregongirl oregongirl is offline
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We were turned down by Gladney too. At the time I was devastated. I couldn't understand why they would turn us down. I never did get an answer from Debbie the intake coordinator.

That denial turned out to be a blessing in disguise. At the time I didn't realize that locking yourself to one agency is not the fastest way to adopt. A few days later we signed up with One World Adoptions referral service. We were matched within hours and our daughter was born that same week. Many of the people who signed with Gladney at the time that we were rejected are still waiting and our beautiful daughter will be a year old next month.

My advice to you is to sign up with many different referral services like One World, Little Bit of Heaven, Bundle of Joy, Heaven Sent, etc...don't lock yourself into an agency.
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Profile shown: Tuesday July 19th, 2011.
Chosen by birthparents: Wednesday July 20th, 2011!
Beautiful baby girl born: Thursday July 21, 2011!
Placed in our arms: Saturday July 23, 2011!
Finalized: December 22, 2011 at 5:47AM!

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  #15  
Old 06-27-2012, 11:17 AM
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vernellinnj vernellinnj is offline
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In NJ facilitators are illegal. Good luck!
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Single and Fabulous!
Former Fostermom (2004-2010) fostered 3 children
Fostermom to one child for 4 years; child reunited with his mom but he's still an active part of my life.
_______________________________________________
November 2010 - Submitted Application for Private Domestic Adoption
March 2011 - Homestudy approved/waiting to be matched
August 2011 - Received "the call" for a baby born the night before! Birthmom signed TPR papers 72 hours later
January 2012 - Birthdad's rights terminated
February 2012 - Finalized!
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