[Gs_Mom]

The other thread got me thinking ...

DS will be 4 in January. Making him 4 1/2 in Fall 2010. I assumed he would go to kindergarten in Fall 2011 (at 5 1/2). But, he is in daycare and already can do many of the things on the lists. Because of the daycare, which has an academic component (though not a strong focus), I think he is pretty well along socially and in his ability to "get" the classroom enviroment. He is also well on his way in terms of numbers, letters, coloring, etc., though we pushing him in that regard.

Should I be thinking about kindergarten when is is 4 1/2? Will they even allow him to start at 4 1/2?

I don't want to put him in too early. Yet, I don't want him bored with the class if he waits another year.

[jp4ga]

Check with your state/local school board. In my state students can not start K until they are 5. Even if they turn 5 a week after school starts they are still not permitted to enter that year.

[swd]

You might not have a choice, so maybe check with the school system before you even try to decide. They might not let him in under any circumstances if he's not 5 by whatever their magic date is. I've been reading a lot of threads like this all over the 'net (my son is a late baby, so we'll have that dilemma, too, when the time comes) and most people (in all different regions of the country) are saying the cutoff date is the cutoff date, and even their kids who were born within a week of it are not being allowed to be exceptions.

[soonersfan]

It all depends on the school system. Our system's cut-off date is September 30. My son's birthday is September 27. Of course, he is only going to be two this year, but I know I will have to decide at some point if I should start him when he's 4 (almost 5) or start him when he is 5 (almost 6). I think his maturity level, size (he is small), and academic readiness will all be factors in my decision.

[PersianMama]

As a former elementary school teacher and as a mother, I will say that borderline kids (boys especially) should not start K too early. They do not mature as quickly as girls. It really doesn't matter if they can name their numbers and letters; they won't lose that ability by waiting another year. What you really have to look at is your child being ten in sixth grade, when everyone else is eleven (just an example of a future grade). It is a well documented fact that two groups of children who struggle more than most in the preteen/teen years are girls who develop earlier and boys who develop later. I certainly wouldn't want to set my son up to be smaller and less physically and mentally mature than his peers as he gets older.

My parents (who are raising my nephew) would not listen to me, and he began K when he was 4. He turned 5 a week or so into the year, so he made the cutoff. My mom said that he was too smart to be in preschool another year. He has been in Gifted classes since second grade...he has also been in trouble most weeks of school. He is now in the sixth grade. School started two weeks ago, and he's gotten two detentions. He is not bad in a violent or aggressive way. He talks out of turn, he's bossy, he makes noises, he forgets his papers and books, etc. I'm not saying that he'd be perfect if he'd waited until he was turning 6, but he would fit in better with his peers. He wouldn't stand out as so immature when compared to the other kids in his class.

[mkviola]

Originally Posted by PersianMama

As a former elementary school teacher and as a mother, I will say that borderline kids (boys especially) should not start K too early. They do not mature as quickly as girls. It really doesn't matter if they can name their numbers and letters; they won't lose that ability by waiting another year. What you really have to look at is your child being ten in sixth grade, when everyone else is eleven (just an example of a future grade). It is a well documented fact that two groups of children who struggle more than most in the preteen/teen years are girls who develop earlier and boys who develop later. I certainly wouldn't want to set my son up to be smaller and less physically and mentally mature than his peers as he gets older.

I couldn't agree more. It usually is best to wait.

[waitinginnj]

My daughter missed the cut-off by 10 1/2 hours. My school district wouldn't have considered a change, although I didn't try. I figured there was no rush and she would be older for college etc.

[BethanyB]

Most school have the five year cut off date. And as a teacher, I agree that it's better to wait if you can. Especially with boys.

[portlowski]

I have the same birthday as your son! I am a mere 43 years older

I started kindertgarten when I was 4 which was a good thing for me because I was a D cup by the time I was in 7th grade. I was academically ready but I think later on when others caught up physically I could have benefitted socially from waiting a year. So there are a lot of things to consider along with academic readiness.

[soonersfan]

I am a teacher too, and I agree it is probably better to wait with boys. That is why I will probably start my son when he is 5 (almost 6). I don't have to worry about it for a few more years, but it is something to think about.

[vegaschristina]

My daughter's birthday was 12 days after the cutoff and she's SO much more prepared for kinder after waiting the year.

[MissDixie]

Good points, Persian Momma!
We started school last week, and our "rule" is that you must be 5 on or by Sept 1. We used to have a TK-1 class, transitional kindergarten to 1st grade, between K and 1st. This was a class that children could go to if they were academically ready for 1st, but not socially or mature enough to handle the structure. Their bday had to fall as an "early" bday, I think anywhere from March to Sept...this class was primarily made up of boys...Just food for thought. This year most of my class is made up of May and July bdays...lots of little youngins!

[OnTheJourney]

My neighbour and I were just talking about this the other day. Her DD will be 4 in February. She was going to start her at 4.5years. She is probably ready but after a lot of thinking she has decided to wait a year and start her at 5.5 years. The main reason - if she starts at 4.5 she will only be 17 years old when she graduates. Her and I both feel that is young, especially if she wants to go off to college on her own right away.

1 more year maturity seems like a good idea at both ends.

[mommy3]

I started Kinder at 4 and vowed to never do that to my children -- and have succeeded, even when I thought I might break my own rule with my oldest dd! I was academically fine all through school, but decisions and worries at each grade, even into college, were hard for me -- and I was always always always the youngest in my class, not easy. Then, here comes my oldest, just days older than me and I *could* have had her test into Kinder early, but went with the age requirement and was soooo right. I followed the same game plan for my ds and now know the dates line up well. There's just so much more independence in subtle ways, intellectual development, small and big issues, depending upon your child. As my oldest dd said, "I'll just be the first to get my driver's license!" (noooo, I thought, b/c she was 5 at the time, ha). My advice is to always wait, honestly. susan

[OakShannon]

I agree that I would be really cautious about starting at 4. Kindy is much more demanding, and much less play-based, than it used to be. But I'm wondering what your son's pre-k teacher has to say. A good pre-k teacher usually has a really good sense of whether or not a child is ready for kindergarten. If your son has been at the same school for awhile, she'll know him pretty well. We had two very good pre-k teachers at our school and I found their observations and recommendations really valuable and usually very accurate.