[dancebabydance]

I am new to this site and not sure if I am doing this correctly but I am so desperate for advice Im willing to take the chance..My story is, I have a friend that I have been friends with for 24 yrs and her daughter who is like a niece to me gave birth to a daughter aug.18th. She already has a daughter that is 2 that she does not take care of. She has made a loving decision to give me the newest baby, my dream come true. I have had her since Sept.24th. I am bonded to this precious angel like I gave birth to her myself. The problem I am running into is one of the potential birth fathers has refused to sign the tpr paper. The others have ignored or signed thier rights away. My lawyer says we should have no problem getting his rights terminated but there is a chance it wont happen. This guy is currently in prison (3rd time). He is a registered sex offender (he had sex with a 16yr). He is a habitual drug user. He has not filed anything in the time allotted to him, so my attorney has advised me to do all the paper work for this guy so we cover all legalities so nothing can be contested in the end. This guy has never tried to see the baby, contact the baby or us for that matter. He is a friend to my step-son so he knows how to reach us. My question to anyone out there is how likely do you all think it is that we will get his rights terminated and be able to offically give this angel our last name and legally call her ours? I am so stressed and worried. I dont know what I will do if I lose this lil girl..she is my life. Please any feedback would be appreciated..Thank you

[mom25-4g1b]

I am some what familiar with this, as it sounds very much like our son's case . With what you have described, it seems extremely unlikely that you would have a problem. Did he give a reason for not signing? In my state rights may be terminated if a bparent has not seen the child in 6 months (abandonment). How long is his current prison sentence?
Blessings,
Shelley in PA

[joskids]

First of all, they should do a paternity test to see if he is even a party to the situation. Secondly, he is a registered sex offender -- if that is true, he shouldn't even be in close proximity to a child. In the state of Ohio an alleged biological father would also have to prove that he support the mother thru her pregnancy both financially and emotionally. He would have to establish that he has supported the child financially (more than a pack of diapers every 2 weeks). From what I know, he would have zero chance, yet I know you have concerns. We had a contested adoption by a biological father but he did not file the necessary paperwork, did not support the biological mother financially or emotionally (just the opposite), and he lost his rights.

[shellers]

It really can depend on the state. I hope you have no problems. We are currently waiting for birthfather rights to be terminated in Kansas and our lawyer has assured us that we shouldn't have any issues- (but its still on my mind) since no support was given during pregnancy and he hasn't tried to contact anyone.
His termination hearing is May 5th so just a few more weeks to worry. Good luck to you

[dancebabydance]

I would like to thank you all for responding to this thread. I have searched the internet to no avail and just so happened on this site. I appreciate all your resoponses. To give a little more info..I paid my lawyer for the paternity test fees but he has now decided that it is up to potential bfather to file and pay for that..Im not sure im in agreement because I would rather do it and get it over with..(she doesnt look like him). My lawyer says since he has failed to provide support, contact and failed to file any appropriate paperwork that we should have no problem terminating his rights. Even though he signed the paper saying he didnt want the adoption to go through he was suppose to file his own papers within 30 days and hasnt done so..its been 4 months. His current (16yr old) girlfriend wants the baby is what I am hearing the reason for him not wanting us to adopt. The 16 yr. old and bmother are enemies so I think it is just a game of drama that no one is thinking of this beautiful little girl that I have loved and taken care of for 7 1/2 months now. My lawyer doesnt think we will have a problem but I cant sleep at times because I think of the life she will have with these young people that think about nothin but drinking and drugging. It literally gives me nightmares that scare the hell out of me..Again thank you for your words of encouragement!!! They are greatly appreciated..

[JustCourtney]

It sounds like you are in a state with a putative father registry? Has your attorney told you when you can terminate? The fact that he has not provided support for the bmom or child since birth can also be terms for terminating as a delinquent father in some states. I would ask you attorney exactly what needs to happen now, and when you can go to court. I would also make sure that your attorney is a AAAA attorney who specializes in adoption law since your case is a bit messy (it sounds like he knows his stuff, though!)