[ChromaKelly]

I don't know how many times I've said "I can't wait till after we are finalized so I can file a complaint about our HS agency!" Heck, I've probably said it here a dozen times, lol. Well, now we are finalized, and I know it's stupid, but a little part of me is STILL afraid to file any type of formal complaint for fear of some sort of retribution. Like it would be held against us if we ever wanted to adopt in the future, or it will get sent to.. someone, I don't know.
If you had a bad experience, I mean like true unprofessionalism, unethical behavior, that type of thing, did you complain to anyone? I went with this agency in part because I had not found any complaints about them, and at first when I was inquiring, he would call me back right away and I liked that. We cannot be the only family that had such a bad experience. I just wonder how many other people put up with lousy, unprofessional service and let it go undocumented.

[Singlemom619]

I hate to say this because I know it will cause people to not report things BUT I have to be honest...

Years ago I had some major issues that were putting my child's health at risk. I complained to the agency for months and nothing changed so I went above them... As soon as they found out they yanked him out of my home.

It took months and an attorney to have the child put back (through another agency.) I've been scared of SWs and DSS since then.

I told myself after we finalized that I would write a formal complaint -but I never did - because like you I'm still scared of them. Even with nothing to stand on back then they managed to remove him (he was a foster placement then) and there's no way I'd risk them taking him or my younger son now.

Now I will speak up, but only to a certain point.

I think it's a horrible way to live, but based on what I went through and what it did to my son I'm not willing to risk it anymore.

[loveajax]

Chroma, I cannot describe how angry I was at mu agency sw and director. I could write a book.

I always said I woulf write a letter. I even consulted with an atty friend of mine whi is an adad and he was itching to sue them!

For some reason, after finalization, I decided not to. A) because I really didn't want it to be part of my dd's adoption story and B). I thought I may adopt again and did not want to be marred.

Anyway, I sorta regret wimping out! Good luck whatever you decide.

[MamaS]

I waited until my child was home and finalized. Then I filed complaints with the state BBB and the state licensing board. There were no "blogs and forums" in the '80s and I wanted to warn other people who might consider using that agency.
Interestingly, my CW quit the agency because of their unethical practices and formed her own. When we were ready for a second child, we went through her agency to the same country.

[Steph-Jason]

That's really a hard one. I don't know what I'd do. We didn't have any problems with anyone in our agency or SW- in fact we really like them. I think I'd be like you & be kind of scared about it though. At the same time you don't want other aparents to have to go through that. If it were me I think I'd wait until I had all of the paperwork- birth certification, adoption creed, ss card, etc. & then I think I would write a letter. You might look around online- there might be some type of thing for reporting adoption agencies.

[devildogwife]

We did not. Although we had major issues with who we used, I just don't want to burn any bridges. It's not worth it to me anymore. My reasons are really the same as loveajax's.

[aclee]

As everyone knows, we had problems with the ethics behind one of our agencies. In the end we were not given a choice on filing because our social worker in MO filed a complaint with the attny general in the state the agency was in, so we didn't have to.

[tanmansmom]

We were a private adoption and getting the written report from the homestudy took 9 months! Our attorney threatened with reporting him and let the courts know that when she needed someone appointed to do a homestudy for her he was NOT to be used. If possible, let the attorney do it; then you are not the bad guy but the point gets across.

[ChromaKelly]

Oh yeah, we do still need to get his SS number and birth certficate, so I guess we should wait until after that.
Aclee, that's great that the SW in MO filed the complaint, probably carries more weight too coming from another professional.

[Nevada Jen]

I didn't even though I said I would. Same as everyone else, I was scared and thought I might need them in the future. Now that a few years have passed, I am glad I did not. Nothing was extreme as it seemed when I was almost literally crazy for a baby.

[mommamarci]

We also did not. We thought we might use a different agency in the same city and worried a social worker might have switched jobs and we would then be THAT family. So, we let it slide. I still am VERY cautious about even sharing our experience because I fear it could come back and haunt us later.

(Then again, this agency did call and leave us a nice message after they found out I told someone about our experience...)

[brooklyn_girl]

That's a tough one. I'm not sure how agencies work, but I know that adoption lawyers talk to each other online somewhere (ours told us she has such a resource) - they compare notes and share info. If we put a complaint against our lawyer it would probably be put out online as "avoid these crazy people!". However I would not hesitate to take action against the social worker we used since she was independent. If you do lodge a complaint against an agency, could you go the independent route the next time around? Hmmm.

[GuatMommy2Be]

Kelly,

Our adoption agency was located in Florida. It has pretty much been a waste of time to complain. They did an investigation and while there was proof of child trafficking they said they needed more. The investigation ended up hurting ME more then the agency! The agency made LOTS of slanderous remarks, even went as far as violating the HIPAA law in regards to my husband and I. I ordered the public record and it is 1000 pages long - yet nothing can be done to the agency. Florida has not updated their laws since the 1950's - so they in NO WAY reflect how adoptions are done now. It's pitiful.

The only person I found worthy of complaining to was Richard Klarberg. My ex-agency wanted Hague Accreditation to perform adoptions in Hague-Compliant countries... thankfully with all of the complaints they were repeatedly denied their accreditation.

Ultimately, you need to decide what to do.. If your agency was in another state you may have better luck if not... Florida is a real waste of time.

[devildogwife]

Originally Posted by GuatMommy2Be

The only person I found worthy of complaining to was Richard Klarberg. My ex-agency wanted Hague Accreditation to perform adoptions in Hague-Compliant countries... thankfully with all of the complaints they were repeatedly denied their accreditation.

I'm glad to hear that. I know you had a horrible time with them.

[Magic_Hat]

It makes me sick that we are all scared of these agencies when they are working for us!! There is so much shady stuff going on out there and yet we have no power to stop it. I'm just venting...

ChromaKelly, the agency doesn't have anything to do with the SS# and new birth certificate, right? Our agency didn't, we were finished with them at the point where we were getting those docs. So I don't see how they could interfere in any way if you did complain.