[valugirl]

Hi I need advice? I adopted a DD three years ago. ANd have wanted to adopt another. But within the last 1 1/2 years my husband has gone through 3 jobs because the places keep closing. Now they he is at his lowest paying job. We are making ends meet some how. But I so want a another baby. We would have to put the cost on to a creidt card and pay it off that way. My heart aches for another baby to hold but my brain thinks maybe we should wait. It's just that I have had to wait a year and half to just say yes and start the paperwork. I don't want a huge age difference bewtween kids. So should I follow my heart and just go for it or my brain and keep waiting for who knows when? Thanks
Sher

[Sdirector]

Only you can make that decision...

I personally, having a disdain and hatred for debt, would NOT put the cost on a credit card. With an already stressed situation financially, you could be asking for trouble. If you are able to plan, I would encourage proper planning.

Is there a way that you or husband can earn extra money? Be creative! Save and put it aside. Perhaps the adoption tax credit would help you as well? If after looking at your tax situation, you would save a substantial amount on your taxes (and this is HIGHLY situation dependant), then perhaps the credit card plan might work.

But DON'T just tell yourself you will be getting a credit, so you can do this! Check for yourself.

I understand wanting another child, but having a new child and a precarious financial situation can make it very stressful on the family!

[Casey677]

Or what about adopting from foster care?

[Fran27]

It's tough times isn't it I know it's not what you want to hear, but I wouldn't do it... Just think about what will happen if your dh loses his job again, and you'll have so much money to pay off the credit card. Or, as mentioned above, I'd look into foster-to-adopt instead.

[devildogwife]

I wouldn't do it either. I hate having debt hanging over my head. Hate it. We won't adopt again until we're in a much better position financially, even though we'd like to start much sooner. I'd keep waiting.

[journeytolily]

I feel your pain! We would like to adopt one more time, but DH says that till we pay off about $10,000 of debt we already have (that would be most of it), and save at least $10,000 toward the adoption costs, we will have to wait.

I'm not getting any younger! But he is right - with the economy the way it is, we can't possibly add anymore debt, and we really need to pay off what we already have!

I hope things will improve for you soon. As someone else suggested, perhaps you could find a way to make some extra money, maybe a parttime job, and put that away toward your future adoption.

[Wisdom]

What does your husband think about it? Personally I wouldn't do it because credit card debt is the worst. With the job market being so bad right now what if your husband lost his job for several months at a time? With such high interest rates you would owe much more than originally owed.

[valugirl]

I just want to say thnaks for all your input. My heart is breaking but I guess we will have to the adoption on hold for now. We are going to look into foster -adopt. My heart didn't want to tell my brain the truth. So for now I will be grateful for the beautiful DD I do have and the other baby that is not yet in my arms. Thanks for letting me know I am not alone out there.
Sher

[sambob]

I personally wouldn't go into credit card debt to adopt, but I would start planning now if it's something you want to do. It's amazing what you can accomplish once you put your mind to it - you'd be surprised how fast your money can add up if you start giving up little things here and there. Maybe you can think about low cost ways to adopt. Maybe just hire an attorney on retainer with a small deposit, do your own networking, see if anything comes up that way. Save your money for bigger expenses - agency fees (if necessary), legal expenses once they come up, etc. Maybe even ask professionals to lower their rates. In this economy, everybody's hurting for business, so they might be willing to negotiate. It's worth a try.