[mkviola]

Hello! It's been awhile since I've been on here and it's great to catch up with everyone.

We are planning on beginning the process of adopting a sibling for MariElla this spring. With MariElla, we created a portfolio, but it was never seen by anyone. I'm starting to think about doing another portfolio and am just wondering what we should put on the front. Before, we had "Brian and Melissa" with a picture of the two of us. This time, should we still just have both of our names or include our daughter's name? Do we have just a picture of the two of us or have one of us as a family?

Wishing you all a blessed 2009!
Thank you.

[mdesi]

Personally, I would do one of the whole family. Someone will want their baby to have a big sister, and that would be the perfect match, in my way of thinking. Plus, I think it speaks to being completely honest and that you are very proud of your first daughter.

[journeytolily]

Definitely put a photo of all of you, with all your names. I wondered about this too, but then decided that whatever baby would be coming to us, would be coming home to a family with both parents AND older siblings. You are a family unit, and I think it's important that you show that to any prospective bmoms.

[mkviola]

Thank you. That's helpful. We are having a ton of pictures of all of us inside the portfolio. I just wasn't sure what to do with the front. I even debated if we put "The (Our last name) Family", but I don't think that seemed right, either.

[nurse_reedle]

CRUD! We just used Stephen and I on the front...Isaac is all through the rest of it.

[Saya]

This has actually been driving me a little crazy. We are putting together our profile right now, and decided (with the recommendation of our agency) to use a photo of all 3 of us on the cover. But do you HOW difficult it is to find a photo of ALL 3 of us where we are all smiling and Anabel - little miss active - is actually sitting still on our laps for the 3 seconds it takes to take a picture?! Ugh - none exist and it's been impossible so far to get one done! This might actually be the thing that delays getting our homestudy done in the end (that and my darn hard-to-print fingertips. . .).

[spischer]

Hi There mkviola!

Long time no talk....

Just wanted to say that is great that you are thinking about starting on number 2! Can't wait to hear more updates as you go through the process.

We are happy as can be with our little boy - the agency was wonderful! Thanks for all your advice!

Take care,
spischer

[rd200]

HI, i put on the first page of ours a 5x7 picture of ALL of us,(me, dh and bio son) and then on the other side of the picture i had room to put the dear birthmom letter. mine was pretty short, so i could fit it in. then on the bottom part of the page i put all three of our names staggered across. its hard to explain, but it turned out awesome. if you want i can email you it so you can get an idea. i was soooo stressed about how my profile would turn out and once i got at it, it wasnt that bad. i think it turned out great! i wouldnt however put THE ........ Family. i dont think you should have any identifying info on your profile unless you are planning on a completely open adoption. Just my opinion. Rach

[redbonec]

But do you HOW difficult it is to find a photo of ALL 3 of us where we are all smiling [/quote]

Saya, this was us! This past August we turned in our portfolio, and on our cover was one of the ONLY pictures of the three of us, and the only good one. And it was her first birthday! K is now almost 2-1/2!!! A little behind the times. On the inside we did put one pic of us together with our dogs. We asked a neighbor the day before turning it in to take a pic of us. She took some of just the three of us, and some with the three of us plus two dogs. Out of like 10 pictures, the BEST one was the one where K was smiling but her eyes were mostly closed. The other one we were considering K had a frown. Those were the two out of ten pics! It IS hard to get a good one!

[mommy3]

Ahhh, the photos. Although every other photo in the portfolio needs to look casual and more "in the moment" that main key photo has to be perfect, from what we realized. I found it's really hard to achieve that normal, great photo look with more than 1 person without a profesional photographer who understands what you are trying to achieve. First, we tried having a close friend take the photos and ended up with 70 "almost there" photos where the light or my hair or someone's smile was just that much off. Then, we bit the bullet and found another person (actually a more distant friend) who took our photos and then we had too many good ones to decide between, really great. Also, on the front of the portfolio/letter use used "The XX Family" with our family name, which we heard later (both adoptions) really drew our children's birthparents in. Have fun! susan

[yehudit]

Hello,
We were actually told to use a photo of just the two of us for the cover, and include photos of our son inside. I think either way there will be an emom for you.

Good luck,

[kellyjames]

I did a picture of all three of us on the first page, and then pics of our kiddo and us throughout the rest of it. (He's now 3 and a half.) One thing I did do on the last page that I loved is include two pictures--one of my husband and I holding Ryan at the hospital, when we met him, and then one of the three of us 3 years later. They're labeled. "From this--we meet our son for the first time... to this, three years later" and then there's a message about how we love being parents and would love to welcome another baby to our family. I thought it was cool to show how the transition from parents of a newborn to parents of a rambunctious 3-year-old.

Either way, your new baby will be joining your family, not just you two as a couple, so I vote for the family pic as the first one. Just my $0.02.

[mkviola]

Thank you all so much for your advice! We would love an open adoption, so I have no problem using our last name. Our first adoption is completely closed (per birth mother's request), but definitely not our choice. We have the inside of the portfolio mapped out. We are doing each of our expectant parent letters (individually) and at the end of those, along with our signatures, a picture of either myself or my husband (depending on who's letter it is), holding our daughter. The rest of the pages are the usual family times that most put in their portfolios. So many decisions!!!

Spischer, so glad you had a good experience with the agency. We love them and are so excited to be working with them again. Melissa

[Saya]

Hey all - while this thread is active I wanted to ask a follow-up portfolio question. Last adoption we didn't do one, so it's new to me. For those who have done them or are in process:

How many pages was it?
How many photos did you use?
If you have kids already, what percentage of the photos included your current child(ren)?
What percentage were family and friends outside the immediate family?

Thanks!!

[rd200]

HI, i just finished my profile. mine was 9 pages. i had a picture of me, dh, and son on front page. i had two pictures of extended family and the rest were a combination of all of us. i did mine where i had a page, my dh had a page and my son had a page and so on. the majority of our pictures had our son in it. i dont know if that is advised or not, but that is our family!!! he is most important to us and alot of our good pictures had all of us together or me and my son together so we used them. we had about 20 pictures. we didnt actually have any of friends outside our family. i guess i just didnt think it was that relavant. i had to shorten mine up already. it was 11 pages and my agency only likes 8. what can i say, i like to talk. good luck Rach