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#1
12-21-2008, 09:24 AM
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"Wanting" to place your child with an Adptive family
HI, i need some advice. i'm working on the final touches of my profile and the last paragraph of it reads," In closing, thank you for reading our letter and we hope you have seen a glimpse of our lives as a stable, loving, and nurturing family that you would want your child to be part of."
And then the last 2 sentences. But what i'm concerned with is that i dont think that the birthmom really WANTS to place their child with some other family, but more that they need too. i mean, every situation is obviously different, but i dont want to offend anyone that is reading it that they simply WANT to give up their child to my family. i think its okay, but does anyone think it would be offensive? on the other hand if they are looking at profiles, they probably have made that decision that they are more than likely placing their baby for adoption. Any input would be appreciated. i'm trying to get it completely done before my last home study appt tomm so my SW can read the whole thing through. Thanks so much Rach 
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Adoption Information
Adoption Websites
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#2
12-21-2008, 09:30 AM
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change the "want" to "considering"... Because at this point until TPR is signed they are "considering" adoption/placement...
__________________
1993 decided to start a family 1995 discovered problems 1995-1998 fertility Drs and surgeries 1999-2003 break from it all 2003-2005 thought about adoption but trying to find a way to afford it. 2006 decided to do whatever it took to create a family. Money should not decide a family! January 2006 gathering information applying for homestudy. July 2006 homestudy completed- we are officially waiting! July 06-March 09 Several situations that didn't work out.. Our baby will find us,  until then...We are 4-everwaiting for our angel  It finally happened after over 2.5 years of waiting, our angel found us!!! ... Baby Girl Born March 10th! Home forever March 19th, 2009 
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#3
12-21-2008, 09:39 AM
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I would end it at "family"...but that's JMO.
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#4
12-21-2008, 10:07 AM
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Quote:
lovemy2boys, great suggestion. I agree.
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#5
12-21-2008, 10:48 AM
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I agree...ending at family is perfect!
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#6
12-21-2008, 12:42 PM
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I also agree at ending it at "family."
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#7
12-21-2008, 03:33 PM
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I agree with ending it at "nurturing family," too. However, that's the writer in me. Conversationally, what you wrote is good, but in writing it reads better to end it at "family."
__________________
11/07 Started research on infant domestic adoption 01/08 Met with Home Study Agency 03/08 Started Home Study 05/06/08 Yeah! Home Study approved!  
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#8
12-21-2008, 05:09 PM
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I agree with the other posters about ending it with "family".
__________________
 ~~Raven~~What does not kill me, makes me stronger. ~ Friedrich Nietzsche, Twilight of the Idols, 1888, German Philosopher (1844-1900) 
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#9
12-21-2008, 06:00 PM
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End it with family. You're right, I can't think of a single first mom or emom that WANTS to place her child for adoption.
__________________
First mom to the amazing Kiddo and adopted adult. 1-4-2009 Mom and I visit Kiddo despite the bad weather. He really loved the blue mittens I made him and even helped me plan my living room. Apparently Hot Wheels wallpapper is the way to go. 2-16-2009 I got a promotion, that comes with a raise. Mom and Dad are visiting and we're going to Al's for pie to celebrate. 4-27-2009 Dad surprises me with a Lady Ugly Stick (an awesome fishing rod that is pink) and a 2nd Iowa Light Artillery Battery jacket. I'm a lucky girl! 5-30-2009 Kiddo turns five. It is hard to believe he is that old already, it seems like just yesterday he was being born. I was at peace for the first time on his birthday, what a nice feeling. 6-13&14 2009 A cannon live fire in Casper WY. We got third place and I got to see Devil's Tower for the first time, it was pretty awesome. 7-4-2009 Amelia the kitten comes to live with me and Liz. Talk about jealousy, Liz will adjust though.
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#10
12-21-2008, 06:16 PM
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Another vote for ending it at "Family". It stills gets your point across, but doesn't have the possibly offensive tone. Plus, you won't wonder and worry about it if it's not in there!
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#11
12-21-2008, 07:31 PM
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I agree. It sounds perfect ending at family.
__________________
12/8/08- Received the call about a 4yo boy. 12/11/08-1/28/09 Visitation & transition. 2/1/09 He has officially moved in, and now we wait for finalization. 9/3/09-Adoption is Finalized!!! Woo hoo!   9/9/09-Started the process again. This time for a baby girl ! _____________________________ http://awesomestever.blogspot.com/
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#12
12-21-2008, 08:59 PM
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Well, its pretty unanimous than. i had kinda thought that ending it at family was good too but wanted another opinion. thanks alot everyone.
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#13
12-21-2008, 09:40 PM
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I would end it in family - but don't put the "nurturing, stable" part. It just sounds like you are selling yourself to much IMO...
__________________
 "Sometimes on the way to a dream, you get lost and find a better one!"
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#14
12-21-2008, 09:47 PM
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I would end it at family, too. But, I would keep the stable, nurturing, if that is what you want to convey. We wrote something very similar.
It's a very difficult letter to write! In the end, we found that if we kept it simple and wrote it as if we were saying it (if that makes sense), we were happy with how it turned out.
__________________
8 failed IUI's, 5 failed IVF's, 1 Foster/Adopt placement (maternal aunt claimed him) July 2008 - signed with agency (Domestic Adoption) November 2008 - homestudy approved & profile handed in - Officially waiting! April 2009 - Looking into signing with an additional agency, since we haven't even been "shown" with our current one  June 2009 - Reluctantly signed with additional agency 
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#15
12-22-2008, 01:55 AM
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Quote:
sorry vogi, this made me actually chuckle. this is kinda the whole point of the letter for pete's sake..LOL!
__________________
Leigh 
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