[startedover]

PLEASE READ!

I must tell you that I was in almost the exact situation as you. (not about the will, but bgrandpa wanting to acknowledge dd). I spent the first several months of our adoption worried the birth grandparents would find out the location of my dd because I knew they were very upset about the placement of their grandchild. Well four months later I was sitting at work and having a horrible day when a package arrived address to ME not my dd. I opened it and there was a stuffed bunny with a note attached askiing us to accept it for our dd and signed by her bio grandpa. HE HAD FOUND US! And let me tell you, this wave of relieve and love filled my entire being. I wrote him and told him to feel free to write us and let us get to know each other. 5 months later we introduced him to his only granddaughter (his duaghter was and only child) I thank GOd for the peace we have all found in this sitaution. He did not chose to place this child for adoption and he had no say. Today (almost 2 years later) he has told us how glad he is that they did what was best for her and that it was the right decision and even though it almost killed him in the beginning he knows it was for the best. Our relationship with him, has nothing to do with his daughter. Also my older 2 children do not have a grandpa and this was something I was glad that my youngest could expierence. I am not saying that every situation will turn out this way, but I just wanted to share how worried I was in the beginning and how nice things are now.

[Rubi]

Thanx for all your support and advise....I learn so many things from you and I know deep in my heart that this is just part of our adoption journey. And I also realize that my anxiety is the fear for the un known.....We've been blessed with sutch a wonderfull little angle ...

[thanksgivingmom]

I know without a doubt my parents would want to include my placed daughter - and not because she's the first, or the only (she would be the TENTH of sixteen grandchildren so far) but that wouldn't make her ANY less special to my entire family.

My parents still don't know about her birth and adoption, because honestly, I think it would just kill my Mom to not be able to be "grandma" to this beautiful little girl.

Best of luck to you, wherever this journey takes you!

[asante]

what about blind trust fund.. I think I have heard something like that...