[SL&RL]

Is anyone out there feeling their 3 or 4 ish kiddo isn't needing their nap every day? If they do take a nap, they can't sleep at night, like right now at 10:30 my 3 1/2 year old is still away playing in his room. If they don't take a nap, you have to make sure they are in bed by 7:30 so they don't get overtired and can't fall asleep. Yikes, I'm in a whole new place. I'm wondering if taking away the pacifier at such a late age (3) created a lack of being able to relax without it.
My hubby just picked up a book someone passed on to us...about Raising Boys. Now instead of my "rules", head on pillow......if you get out bed to play (not bathroom), the hallway light will go off (which is devestating to him). He feels we need to talk/snuggle through to the sleepy stage. I can hear our son yawning through the monitor.....and it really doesn't bother me to go into his room and say OK night night that is it...time to sleep. And, then there are tears for a few minutes but no getting out of bed and no playing

I just think he (hubby) is creating a new routine. Right now is PJs, Book & Milk, Brush Teeth, Tuck into bed. So, now it will be listen to his feelings and acknowledge the sadness and snuggle ???? after he goes to bed ??? Any thoughts ??? Anyone ??

[OakShannon]

I do think that there are 3 and 4 year old kids who have outgrown their need for a nap. It seems really individual. Maybe you can have a "quiet time" instead. He can look at books or do some other very quiet, restful activity so that he can rest his body, even if he doesn't sleep. If he's in his bed playing, he's still getting the benefit of a little down time.

As far as the new bedtime routine, it seems pretty sweet to me. If your husband wants to snuggle and talk to your son at bedtime, why not see how that works? In my experience, it is often in those quiet moments that kids are able to open up and share things, so there could be real value in it.

By the way, which book did he read? I just finished, It's a Boy! by one of the men who wrote Raising Cain.

[HappyHopefulMommy]

I have an almost 4 year old. She naps almost every day, but does not NEED it. She actually has "quiet time" every day. I don't tell her she needs to take a nap, but she will look at books or play for a little bit, and then just climbs into bed and falls asleep, every day. It is kind of funny. I will wake her up after an hour of sleeping though. Nap or not though, she still goes to bed by 8 pm (sometimes though she will lay there for a hour) and then gets up around 7 am.

We always read books and sing songs with all of our kids at bedtime. And we have a reward chart with stickers, (going to bed good is one of their things on the chart). But this is the age that most kids are in between needing naps. good luck.

[feelingreyt]

My son will be 4 in Oct and he rarely takes a nap. He does have quiet/down time though where he will lay and watch a little TV or play quietly with his toys. Sometimes I will rock/hold him for a bit after the baby is put to bed. Of course through out the day and evening the boys are held and cuddled, but he really seems to enjoy it when his baby brother is not right there too, LOL!
At bedtime we generally read to him, snuggle and talk. I have never been able to just send my kids to their room and have them go to sleep on their own at this age. Sometimes I still go and read to, lay down and talk with my 8 yr old dd at bedtime. I feel it's a great bonding time for us.
With our 13 month old, dh usually rocks him to sleep at bedtime. At naptime though, I generally have to lay him in his bed to go to sleep by himself because he won't settle down otherwise. All kids are different, thats for sure!

[feelingreyt]

Double Post...Sorry!

[ChromaKelly]

My girls gave up the nap somewhere between 2.5 and 3. The switch to beds was the nail in the coffin for that. I was at least getting them to do "quiet time" in their rooms, but with us being gone for two weeks, my mother didn't even try it, and now they won't stay in their room. I think having twins sharing a room makes it more difficult though.

I do find if they happen to nap, yes, they are up longer at night. I'm with you though, I'm a put them to bed and that's it kind of person. If your hubby wants to change things around, I would let HIM deal with it, but that's just me. Yes, I do go back in if there is crying or they need something, but I have limits on it, or it becomes an endless game of "put my blanket back on", "I need a tissue", etc.

Just clarifying a bit, yes, we do have snuggle time and a bedtime routine, but it's out in the living room and then we do hugs and kisses in their room, and then if all goes as planned, that's it.

[Yash]

I'm having this same problem. We have a routine, but still Jory is up. Last night, I heard him talking at 10:30 from his bed. UGH!! He goes to pre-school and they do have naptime. For a while, I thought he didn't need it anymore, yet on the weekends sometimes he falls asleep on his own.

I do let him play after he comes home from school to work off the energy, but it doesn't seem to be helping.