[ChromaKelly]

OK, I wouldn't do it for real, I think it's just the cabin fever setting in, but really, how would they know if we left? We're in the agency apartment right now, and we are planning on leaving it tomorrow and getting a little closer to the state border. I know, we're only 45 min right now, but we're so sick of being here. We need a change of scenery. I was joking like what if our car accidentally keeps driving?

I know we can't really leave the state, we wouldn't jeopardize the whole adoption, I'm just kind of thinking out loud.

[aclee]

I have no idea how they would know and wondered the same thing. We just got a call from the attny, and then we left a day or so later. We did stop by the cradle car facility so they could see him again before we left, but no one said we had to or anything.

[gigigeorge]

OMG, 5 weeks ago I could have written that post ! We got stuck in California for almost 5 weeks waiting for ICPC clearances... I so wanted to leave, I wanted to be home... I asked the same question - lol. How WOULD they know???? lol

In the end we waited it out, because we didnt want to risk it but man I was tempted

gina.

[Linny]

I honestly don't know....but I've had a conversation with an attorney who told me about a family that DID leave before they were given the ICPC-okay. It seems that somehow, this WILL jeopardize an adoption. And...because this particular couple DIDN'T Wait...there was great concern that the entire adoption was 'off'. Don't ask me specifically 'why'; I just know it was a VERY tense and worry-ful time for that family---as I was told.
I suspect, there's a date and time validation from both offices as to the 'when'. I know paperwork has to be verified somehow. It's weird isn't it?
And yet, I know that ICPC is in place to assure that someone isn't crossing state lines with an illegal baby....kidnapping and such, KWIM?

For us, it wasn't bad, as we had friends/family to see during the process. But, having to stay in an apartment, would drive me a little bonkers too.

Hang in there...

Sincerely,

Linny

[minibus]

I don't think they would know and boy, I was tempted, let me tell ya. But I never would have risked it .. the consequences were WAY too great. We had to stay in an extended stay hotel/motel ... I hate to think what the poor neighbors thought!

[Fran27]

They would know if something happened and you had to take the baby to the ER for example (even if it's nothing but you're worried). Personally I wish we had stayed in an apartment, an hotel room was the worst (with only one computer with Internet access in the lobby!). Plus that week added another $2k bill to the adoption, considering we had to board our pets too...

Hope you go home soon!

[HeidiK]

I did think about it too, and called MY lawyer freind to ask about it. He even looked into it for me.....its a felony and would have resulted in the baby being turned over to the agency - they did offer to allow me to pay for cradle care and come back when I could wait for ICPC - I lasted the 4 more days and went home a very happy woman

[Stormster]

It didn't even occur to me! We'd been thru so much this was the least of it. Anyway, DS was hooked up to an IV for ten days of it so there weren't many options though there was some talk about moving him back to a hospital in NY Unfortnately that didn't happen.

Hang in there!

[srhbj]

Our agency told us that when ICPC was cleared through the birthstate that we could leave that state and travel anywhere we wanted as long as we did not enter our home state until ICPC cleared there. We plan to go to my motherinlaws after the birthstate clears us to leave so we don't have to stay far from home the whole time. She lives about 25 minutes away from our home in another state, so for us it will work out well, because we won't have to be soooo far away from home.

I hope you hear something soon. I too believe that I would not want to jeapardize the adoption after waiting so long, by coming home when we aren't supposed to. As long as we have been waiting, I actually look forward to that time away and the time we get to spend with our new baby.

[Lovebug]

The thought had entered our mind as well for our second adoption. We were there over a holiday, then there were more delays with court closures and so forth. It was aweful. I longed to get home so badly...to get back to "normal". We stayed in an "extended stay" type...had we not, I would have lost it a lot sooner!!!

--Renee

[OurLifesJourney]

I understand COMPLETELY-having just left Texas on 09-06-08. We had to wait 10 days and cabin fever was definitely peaking!!! I would offer words of encouragement, but there is only so much internet surfing, go to the store, etc. etc. one can do. I wish you a safe and speedy clearance home.

Luv,
Nik

[joskids]

i've known of situations where they didn't wait but I wouldn't chance it.

[gigigeorge]

Yeah to me it wasnt worth the risk, we asked our attorney and she said a myriad of things could happen from them imposing a fine on us to removing our child... definitely not worth it ! lol

With all 3 adoptions, in 3 different states we were told that we could NOT leave the birth state, could not cross the state lines until we were cleared by both states. I know that a lot of attorneys & agencies tell you that once the bstate clears you, you are free to travel but for me I wouldnt risk it. In fact, with this last adoption we were cleared by the birthstate on Friday, if we had left we would have been in violation because on Monday we got notified by the receiving state that the sending states paperwork was incomplete - therefore we hadnt really been cleared.

gina.

[aMarylandfamily]

We were 3-1/2 miles from another state (and about 5 states from our home one) and we were warned big time not to even go that way to the McD's just beyond the state line for if we were to be seen or caught (i.e., got a speeding ticket) outside of the birthstate prior to ICPC final approval we would not only lose custody of the baby we would also be denied any future requests for approval for that child or any other child from any state at a later date as we had violated regulations (if nasty, the birthstate (even in private adoptiosn as ours was) has the right to charge you with kidnapping also - so no matter how tempting - do not risk it - you would regret it later!

[ChromaKelly]

Originally Posted by gigigeorge

OMG, 5 weeks ago I could have written that post ! We got stuck in California for almost 5 weeks waiting for ICPC clearances... I so wanted to leave, I wanted to be home... I asked the same question - lol. How WOULD they know???? lol

In the end we waited it out, because we didnt want to risk it but man I was tempted

gina.

Gina, I read about your ordeal when I searched for posts related to ICPC. OMG! How did you make it?
Our attny also told us we could not leave the birth state. We did however find a form in with all of our placement paperwork about notifying the agency if we plan to leave the state, but I think that might have just been for IL residents.
We did leave the agency apartment today and get a hotel a couple miles from the state border. Kind of stupid I know, it's only like 45 min closer to home, but we so needed to get out of where we were. But now we are in a flood zone (IL/IN border), and one of my girls is throwing up and was crying when I talked to her. I hope we get clearance tomorrow!