[ProspectiveSingleMom]

Just for a little background info -- last fall I was in the middle of working toward a master's degree in counseling when I got a "can't miss" job opportunity in another city. I took the job and moved in February, so I dropped my classes for the spring semester. I have found a program at the university in the city where I now live that is comparable to the program I was in, so I would like to apply to that program. Originally, my plan was to apply to start in fall 2009.

Now that I've started the adoption process, I'm wondering if I should put off school until after the adoption. Problem is, I have no idea how long the adoption will take, and I know that if I didn't get a placement by next fall, the fact that I had put off school would make the wait even more frustrating. At the same time, though, I don't want my school plans to hurt my chances of adopting. I know that balancing a class schedule on top of work would make child care even more of an issue than it already will be, but I'm a little worried that if I put it off for too long, I'll end up just never going back.

Has anyone else been in school or had plans to go to school when they were in the process of trying to adopt?

[CaddoRose]

From someone who teaches college: I would say start school. I know it cost money, but if it were to ever be a problem with your adoption, you can always drop out. I know it isn't the best thing to do, but you shouldn't stop making your life while you are waiting for another part of it to happen.

[ProspectiveSingleMom]

Originally Posted by CaddoRose

From someone who teaches college: I would say start school. I know it cost money, but if it were to ever be a problem with your adoption, you can always drop out. I know it isn't the best thing to do, but you shouldn't stop making your life while you are waiting for another part of it to happen.

That's kinda what I've been thinking lately. I've taken breaks from school before, so it's not like if I start back I'll necessarily be committing to 4 consecutive semesters. Also, with the way costs keep going up, I really worry that the longer I wait, the less affordable it will be. Like, I saw the tuition they're charging now where I got my B.A., and it's almost double what it was when I started there less than 10 yrs. ago!

[finallyamom0310]

I say start school. It will keep you busy while waiting and give you something else to think about. The waiting is afterall the hardest part.

[Fran27]

I kinda wanted to do the same thing, but didn't... It's too expensive to start something I might not have been able to finish.

[Eponine]

I say go back to school. I'm a believer in not putting one part of your life on hold while waiting for something else.

I started my MBA (part time) in 2002, we were trying to conceive at the time. Some people thought it was absurd to be pursuing a degree and a family at the same time, but I didn't see any reason to not go after both things I wanted.

We started the adoption process in early 2005, I finished my MBA in December 05. So we realistically could have been matched/placed while I was in school but again, I didn't see a reason to call of school while waiting - plenty of people parent and continue their education at the same time. And I knew should something come up that made school impossible (special needs child or just not able to keep up with both things) I could re-start my degree at a later time.

Good luck to you!

[ProspectiveSingleMom]

Originally Posted by Fran27

I kinda wanted to do the same thing, but didn't... It's too expensive to start something I might not have been able to finish.

It is expensive, though at this point I feel like I've already invested so much that I need to finish my degree so that it wasn't all a waste. One thing that's kinda depressing is knowing that I'll only make slightly more with a master's degree than I am making now, but I do believe that my long-term income potential will be better with the degree. Also, my previous coursework did help me land my current job, so I have gotten something out of it even without having the degree yet. I think if I could go back and start all over, I'd probably choose a higher-paying field, but now that I'm so far into it, I don't want to change directions and have to start again at the beginning with another field.

One thing that's kinda funny is that even though I'm "taking a break from school," I've still been taking foreign language classes. I'm such a nerd that I can't even go two semesters without taking some sort of class!

[Fran27]

I see your point, but you can always do it later. My mom and my MIL both went back to school at 45 to finish their degrees.

[KarynB]

I took a break from school while we were waiting, although it was only one semester. In a way it was good, in a way I regret it a bit. I also didn't want the call to come and have to stop mid semester and waste money and time...but, it did make the wait more frustrating because I knew what I could have been doing.

Good thing was that it allowed me to work fulltime and save more money for the adoption. Bad news, is of course I had more to finish before once the baby came home.

However, if doing your MA without working fulltime is an option for you once you get a placement, that is ideal! I love being in school and having kids - I have a reasonably flexible schedule and I get way more time with them than if I worked full time. And I agree with you, for me, education doesn't really have a price tag. I don't really see many downsides to being more educated!

Good luck!

[keekee1006]

I say go for it, I'm starting school on Monday. I'm taking advantage of the fact that I'm not a mom yet. If I had a child I couldn't work from 7:30 am -4:30 pm and go to school 5:30 - 9:30 pm three nights a week, it wouldn't be fair to my little one. I may have to push my adoption plans back but I know that I'm building a future for my family.

[leenie71]

I've been thinking about going back to school myself. I'm actually going to a graduate school open house in November. I would be going back for my Master's in nursing to be a geriatric NP/CNS.

I'm very much with the idea that if you're ready to go back, then you should do it. As for me, I think I am going to wait until we have our child with us for various reasons. Not being entirely ready to get back into school mode is one big reason. I also worry about getting the call if I'm in the middle of a semester or clinical rotation. That's just me though!

I think if you have enough desire, you will go back, no matter what is going on with your life. I'll probably have to do it very slowly, taking 1 class per term, but if I'm still thinking about it when baby is here, then I'll do it.

Good luck with whatever you decide! From your posts, it sounds like you are definitely ready!! You're already taking classes (funny, I was thinking about taking Spanish myself during my wait!), so you're in the frame of mind...go for it!