[minibus]

I've tried to read these posts and be as open and honest with myself as possible. I do strongly believe that there is a distinction between being racist, being lazy, and being willing to recognize what you are willing to do / the challenges that you are able to take on at any given point in your life.

My DH and I were very open and honest in our discussions and decisions about what we were open to in terms of race, medical background, birthfamily history, etc. I don't think that just because we made some decisions about not being open to some situations/children, that makes us "lazy". It's about priorities in life, isn't it? We can't give 100% to every injustice in life (for instance, the injustice that our society tends to devalue AA children, especially AA boys), for there would be nothing left to give to the other injustices or even to our day to day lives. We have to do what is right for ourselves and our families and others shouldn't judge or label, because they don't live in our shoes.

I can't seem to say, especially in writing, what I'm trying to say ... but I hope that it's coming across right.

[Fran27]

Very true Oceanica!

[Stormster]

Maybe we WERE lazy, I don't know. I do know that in our safe cozy little life we would have been terrific parents to a child of any ethnicity including AA. But I also know that we might not have done as well coping with some of the things Oceanica described with Athena. It breaks my heart just to read it. I would be a devil dealing with people, I would probably read into situations where there might not have been one and for sure I'd lose many members of our extended circle who were BOUND to say racist things at one point or another.

I know I am not racist. I'm not sure maybe Lazy or maybe some other weakness. I'm certainly not proud that we didn't check off that box on the website and maybe if I knew then what I know now I would have.

[aclee]

Originally Posted by Stormster

I know I am not racist. I'm not sure maybe Lazy or maybe some other weakness. I'm certainly not proud that we didn't check off that box on the website and maybe if I knew then what I know now I would have.

THAT takes guts to say Stormster...you should be proud that you can.

[gracemetcalf]

Here are more book recommendations for those interested (I'm a college professor of English with a specialization in race and racism in America so I've got lots of suggestions!) :

Non-Fiction, history of race/racism, African American experience:

Making Whiteness, Grace Elizabeth Hale
Trouble in Mind, Leon Litwack
Been in the Storm So Long, Leon Litwack
Black on White, David Roediger
White Privilege, Paula Rothenberg

Non Fiction, anti-racist education:

Uprooting Racism, Paul Kivel
Teaching/Learning Anti-Racism, Derman-Sparks
Colored White, David Roediger

Fiction relating to bi-racial experience:

Caucasia, Danzy Senna
Quicksand, Nella Larsen
Crossing the Colorline, Suzanne Jones

Fiction and non fiction on Asian identity:

Yellow, Frank Wu
Paper Daughter, Elaine Mar
Asian American Dreams, Helen Zia

If anyone wants more or is looking for something on a specific issue, I'm happy to help!

[Saya]

(Slightly OT) Hey Grace, what would you recommend, either non-fiction or fiction, on the Hispanic experience and on the creation of Hispanic identiy in the United States?

[gracemetcalf]

Hispanic/Latino experience is, imho, vastly underrepresented in American literature. Here are a few good memoirs/essays on Latino experience:

Growing Up Latino, Stavans
Almost a Woman, Esmeralda Santiago
I also recommend fiction by Sandra Cisneros or Julia Alvarez

There are a few good non-fiction works on the history of Hispanic/Latino immigrants in America (Strangers Among US by Robert Suro is one) but, because of the plethora of nationalities that make up "Hispanic America," it's difficult to find one text that gives a complete picture.

[binkybear]

4 days and 6 pages later....

Where's the OP/Blog Author? Was anything of worth said regarding your situation?

When a thread goes on like this (esp. the passionate ones) with zero input from an originator I start to feel like an experiment, anyone else ever feel like that?

[Fran27]

I thought the OP just read that blog, not that wrote it him/herself...

[nickchris]

Thanks again for the list gracemetcalf, will add the latino/hispanic ones to my list as well. I for one am always open to learning more.. :-) great way to pass on to the kiddos and so on..