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#1
07-11-2008, 07:19 AM
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Instant Family?
Oh my goodness. The roller coaster has started up again! DH and I are trying again at this adoption thing. This time it would be Instant Family ... from 0 to 60 in 3.4 seconds!!! Birthmom is supposed to sign TPR tomorrow ... so tomorrow we could be taking custody of a 20 month old little girl AND her 3 month old brother!! We said we were open to a sibling group, but we never thought it would happen. We are extremely excited and nervous and trying frantically to figure out what preparations we need to make, both short term and long term.
Wish us luck this time!!! p.s. Anyone had any experience with an adoption of a child this age? (The 20 month old, I mean.) She's lived with her birthmom (as far as we know) her whole life and I'm wondering what the grief and loss will look like....
__________________
2/07 - Started researching agencies 7/13/07 - Signed with agency 8/07 - 10/07 - Adoption put on hold 12/19/07 - Homestudy complete 2/25/08 - Officially waiting 5/29/08 - Matched!! Due 7/08 6/3/08 - Baby F born. Surprise! 6/7/08 - Adoption plan fell through  7/11/08 - Matched! 20 month old girl and 3 month old boy 7/12/08 - The kids are in our care! Instant Family (just add water)! 3/20/09 - Finalized! We are legally, and in all other ways, a family.  
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Adoption Information
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#2
07-11-2008, 07:21 AM
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Congrats. That is wonderful news.
I would post as well on the foster care and adoption forum as they will probably have some good advice as well.
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#3
07-11-2008, 07:21 AM
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WOOO HOOO!! That's fantastic Mini!
Everything crossed that this works out! S
__________________
1993 decided to start a family 1995 discovered problems 1995-1998 fertility Drs and surgeries 1999-2003 break from it all 2003-2005 thought about adoption but trying to find a way to afford it. 2006 decided to do whatever it took to create a family. Money should not decide a family! January 2006 gathering information applying for homestudy. July 2006 homestudy completed- we are officially waiting! July 06-March 09 Several situations that didn't work out.. Our baby will find us,  until then...We are 4-everwaiting for our angel  It finally happened after over 2.5 years of waiting, our angel found us!!! ... Baby Girl Born March 10th! Home forever March 19th, 2009 
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#4
07-11-2008, 07:32 AM
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OMG, that is just incredible. I think its good to check over at the foster board. Or maybe even the international adoption board since they too get older babies. I cannot wait to see how this plays out. I think its just amazing when one door closes, another one opens WIDE! Holding my breath here! There is a book called something like "The Weaver's Craft"; something to do with toddler adoption. I didn't read it, but I've heard it recommended several times. I know you don't have time to read right now, but maybe pick it up at the library. Best wishes!!!
__________________
Jen Mom to my son Austin--3/02 (by birth) and my daughter Savannah--12/07 (by adoption) and my daughter in Heaven--Cheyenne (5/99)
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#5
07-11-2008, 07:32 AM
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Congrats Minibus
Please keep us posted!!!!
__________________
April 19, 2008 mailed registration May 3, 2008 mailed application for Domestic Adoption May 6, 2008....set up homestudy appointments  May 20, 2008 - First homestudy meeting June 5, 2008 Fingerprinted June 6, 2008 - Last homestudy meeting and portfolios are handed in!!!! June 6, 2008 - Officially waiting!!!!! please....please ring  September 16, 2008 - Matched with baby due on September 25, 2008 September 25, 2008 Baby boy is born!!!!  October 1, 2008 In our arms October 4, 2008 Home for good after record ICPC clearance in 3 days!!!! 
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#6
07-11-2008, 07:38 AM
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A great resource for the transition of both children...as both will most likely experience grief is A4everFamily.org - HOME and Attach-China. Both are geared toward international adoption...but from foster care. Helping a child through their grief and guiding their attachment to you will look the same regardless of whether they are domestic, foster, and international placements.
Good luck and congratulations.
__________________
Proud Mommy to two...who have taught me I can not change their pasts but I can change me and the way I parent them~ *Yaya~My Siberian Sweetie ~born in 2001~Home 2002~Now 8 and a 'Tween', and in 3rd grade. She's all girl!!!  *Bubbs~My Samaran Sunshine~born in 2003~Home 2004~now 6, in Kindy and such a sweet, silly & special boy!  'My wish, for you, is that this life becomes all that you want it to, your dreams stay big, and your worries stay small, You never need to carry more than you can hold, and while you're out there getting where you're getting to, I hope you know somebody loves you, and wants the same things too, Yeah, this, is my wish.' ~"My Wish" by Rascal Flatts
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#7
07-11-2008, 07:39 AM
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Just wanted to say Good Luck! How exciting!!!!
__________________
April '07 Signed with Facilitator August '07 Matched with emom  October '07 Babygirl M Born December '07 Adoption is finalized Blessed with the most wonderful baby girl in the whole wide world! Starting the process again for #2, June 2009
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#8
07-11-2008, 07:41 AM
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OMG!!!! Good luck and congratulations!! I sort of remember how DD was at 20 months and I think you should talk to the agency about "outside resources" that maybe will be available to help in the transition (if needed). KEEP US POSTED!!
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#9
07-11-2008, 07:47 AM
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Congratulations, I'll keep you in my prayers!! I can't wait to hear how tomorrow goes!
__________________
Luckiest Mom In The World Have Our 1st Blessing From Above... Going For Our Second! 
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#10
07-11-2008, 07:53 AM
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Wow! Good luck!
__________________
“Sometimes the strength of motherhood is greater than natural laws.” - Barbara Kingsolver "If you have love, you don't need to have anything else, and if you don't have it, it doesn't matter much what else you have." - Sir James M. Barrie "Nothing's gonna change my world." - John Lennon
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#11
07-11-2008, 08:20 AM
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WOO HOO! Fingers and toes are crossed over here!
__________________
9/07 - Matched with birthmom through a mutual friend 11/30/07 - Homestudy complete! 2/27/08 - Match failed - birthmom never signed papers  5/5/08 - signed with new agency 5/12/08 - chosen by birtmom! 6/8/08 - it's a girl! 6/17/08 - Home forever with our little girl! 12/15/08 - FINALIZED!   5/7/09 - Homestudy approved for #2! 1/27/09 - present - several leads, but none have panned out. 
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#12
07-11-2008, 08:43 AM
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Congratulations. You must be very excited.
I am happy for you, but also very sad at what your 20 month old will be going through. Even the 3 month old. I think of how my son was at both ages and know how traumatic the change would have been for him. I'm so glad you are aware of the grief these children will face. Obviously their life has not been a bed of roses, but they can't understand at this point that they are moving onto a better life. I am not knowledgeable about the specifics in these situations. However, I am a mom and I know that holding and hugging are what is most needed--for both these children. I would recommend getting good baby carriers as both kids will need to be held almost continually. Check out TheBabyWearer.com There are a lot of experienced moms there who may have ideas on how you carry these two kids at the same time. I will be thinking of your little ones for quite some time to come. I send you the strength to help them (and you) adjust during this very difficult time.
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#13
07-11-2008, 08:49 AM
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Mini- SO excited for you!! I am keeping everything crossed for you. Please keep us posted!
Our DD was placed with us at 3 months, and did GREAT!! The only issues that she had were not wanting anyone but DH and I to hold her. She still struggles with this a bit now. BUT, this is a good thing, because she knows exactly who mommy and daddy are. As far as the 20 month old.....just do your research as everyone suggested. I think things will work out fine. It is a very positive thing that her brother will be placed with her. Best of luck!!!
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#14
07-11-2008, 10:33 AM
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Congratulations Mini. Hope this match works out for you.
__________________
1st DD Hannah Nicole received her wings, July 03  2nd DD May 94  12yr ttc Began adoption July 07 Possible match family placement Oct. 07 Fell through Nov. 07 Jan. 08 Got call ....not chosen by emom 03-07-08 Matched - emom due March 11th Call 03-08-08, lead 4 families to think they were going to parent her baby  Call 03-10-08, she wasn't even pregnant  Waiting again. 03-17-08 Had to turn down baby girl, couldn't get flight before discharge Our hearts are breaking and waiting again. 04-29-08 Got call....not chosen by emom due in June 06-17-08 Got call....not chosen by emom due July 6th Profiled 07-18-08 for emom due in Nov. - emom decided to parent 08-25-08 Profiled 07-25-08 for emom due in Oct. - never heard back from emom Profiled 08-12-08 for emom due in Sept. - never heard back from emom Trying not to get discouraged, but getting more difficult every day. 
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#15
07-11-2008, 10:47 AM
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Holy Cow Mini....you are on the fast track aren't you! LOL. Congratulations and I can't wait to read updates.
__________________
Denice Signed with Facilitator 10/04 Matched with bparents 01/05  Born 05/13/05 and home with us 05/16/05 Finalized 04/26/06
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